Rekindling old relationships...should you go there?

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   rfranklin09posted 14 years ago

   New conversations with old friends spark festive feelings but you are already in a relationship...what do you do or how do you handle it?

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      Justine76posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      romantic? drop it...

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         rfranklin09posted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Wow...just drop it. No peeking allowed, uh? Your are probably right but that curiosity just eats away at you...and eats and eats.

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            Justine76posted 14 years agoin reply to this

            oh, curiousity killed the cat. do you value what you have now?

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            1. 57

               rfranklin09posted 14 years agoin reply to this

               Yes I do value what I have and I would never go romantic with the old friendship. I guess you just think what if and how would it be. It is just my head going there not my heart.

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      prettydarkhorseposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Well, you have to cut it if it is romantic,,,,

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      rebekahELLEposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      'festive'?
      
      stay away if you value your current relationship.

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      Mocha Mommaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Leave it in the past.  There was a reason why you two are no longer together, and if you are in a relationship with someone else, consider what the impact would be to what you have.  Is it worth it?  Remember the grass is always greener on the other side until you find out what it's been fertilized with. 
      
      Move forward, learn from your past relationship and do not project it into your current or existing one.  Keep them separate always. 
      
      Also ask yourself why are you even participating in those conversations with an old acquaintance.  Is it that you seek attention?  You felt that was the one that got away?  Or you haven't had closure to move on in your life? 
      
      Really think about why, and if it's for closure reasons, or insecurity, or because you feel you need attention, then it's time for some personal introspection.  Hope this helps.

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2. 59

   hoodieweatherposted 14 years ago

   You shouldn't play with fire.
   
   

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      rfranklin09posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Not even spark a little smoke.  I think it is just the intrique of the warm feelings coming up but I would never act on them. I am human and very much a woman. Howver keeping it strictly platonic is best!

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   Ghost32posted 14 years ago

   I admit to having a problem with the word "should".  As I've heard  stated,  too often we  "should all over ourselves". 
   
   In the cited instance, I don't see a set answer handling all possibilities.  Seems to me it would depend on ALL of the people involved.

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      Paradise7posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Agreed, thought this was good.
      
      I was just wondering, what did you mean by "festive feelings"?  We all seem to be interpreting "festive" as "romantic".  Is that what you meant?

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      1. 57

         rfranklin09posted 14 years agoin reply to this

         No not romantic feelings but excitable if that is a word. Or maybe I will describe it as flirty perhaps. You know there is some history there with the old friend so maybe I have some repressed feelings just coming to the surface.

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   2. 57

      rfranklin09posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Yes that does make a lot of sense based on the people involved. I believe you can be in control of your urges and no one has to get hurt. Having your special relationship is special and having friends that may intrique you isn't bad either. You just have to know when not to cross the line.

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   Paradise7posted 14 years ago

   You're a decent woman and have a child.  (I can tell from your photo/avatar.)  I believe you, YOU just want to be friends.  But is that what HE wants?  BE CAREFUL!

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      rfranklin09posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Now that is the question. He is divorced. Right now it seems to be "lets catch up" time and pretty innocent. I wonder how I will react if his intentions are different.

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5. 68

   drej2522posted 14 years ago

   I guess the question is...do you trust yourself? If so, then you have nothing to worry about.

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6. 69

   Paradise7posted 14 years ago

   Plan to walk away, if you treasure your current committed relationship.
   
   How would you feel if the shoe was on the other foot and your guy was looking at renewing a friendship with a lady from HIS past?

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   1. 57

      rfranklin09posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I am a woman and I would be very upset. You are right...that definitely keeps you grounded. I would not want to jeopardize what I have now.

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7. 79

   europewalkerposted 14 years ago

   Don't invite trouble, leave your baggage at the door.

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   Clovellyposted 14 years ago

   I did it, one thing lead to another, but of course .... now all that is left is a trail of destruction. We all want to believe that we can handle situations, control ourselves ..... think of the worst case scenario that could happen .... and then you will have your answer.

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   Star22posted 14 years ago

   You cannot live in the past. But if you're single, and you do find yourself talking with a GOOD friend from the past then I don't really seem the harm in it. Especially if your GOOD friend from the past is single too!!

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    blackheart50posted 14 years ago

    take a good look at your present relationship and see what you have with the person you are with now, thensee how much you will lose if you do rekindle an old flame,then ask yourself is it worth it,was i really happy with that person,and what was the reason i ended that relashionship.think real hard at your answers. just stop and think!

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