The Morning Conversations of Barack & Michelle Obama #12

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April 16, 2011 - Open Mic

A fictional account of the private morning conversations of Barack & Michelle Obama by Dexter Yarbrough. Twelfth in a series.

Barack: Why are you still upset about this?

Michelle: Because I have told you time and time again to watch what you say when there is a microphone and reporters around!

Barack: How was I supposed to know that my remarks would be picked up?

Michelle: Barack, you are being an idiot! Just because you were back home in Chicago does not mean you are to let your guard down.

Barack: What did I say that was so bad?

Michelle: OK. I will start with you saying that federal workers are "slugs and not doing their job."

Barack: I said "some," Michelle. I was actually defending government workers by saying they compare favorably to private sector workers.

Michelle: And what part of this will your critics seize upon, Barack? Many federal workers will only remember your "slugs" comment.

Barack: Alright.

Michelle: How about the remarks about technology in the White House? Why would you even mention that the telephones don't work? And the comment about you being the President of the United States! Oh, let me quote it for you! (Michelle quotes) "The Oval Office, I always thought I was going to have really cool phones and stuff. I'm like, C'mon guys, I'm the president of the United States. Where's the fancy buttons and stuff and the big screen comes up? It doesn't happen. It's true in the Pentagon. It's true in the agencies. It's true in the Department of Homeland Security." (End of Michelle quoting)

Barack, what were you thinking? You aren't playing XBOX and Playstation in the Oval Office, dummy! What does the rest of the country and the world think? That we operate in some ghetto fabulous way?

Barack: Well...

Michelle: Barack, you got comfortable around those donors at your fundraiser in Chicago. I told you and Joe Biden, after he opened his big mouth, to watch what you say, didn't I?

Barack: Yes.

Michelle: And then those remarks about the battle with the GOP over the budget! If you had private conversations with GOP leaders over health care reform and other social programs, why are you telling donors what you said? Do you understand the meaning of "private?"

Barack: I was just explaining that I stood up to the House and Senate GOP leadership by letting them know that I wasn't going to be nickel-and-dimed.

Michelle: I haven't heard John Boehner on an open mic discussing his conversations with YOU! I haven't heard Mitch McConnell talking about his private conversations with YOU!

Barack: Alright, Michelle. You made your points. I should have been more careful.

Michelle: Damn right you should have been more careful! Let me be very clear. You are not a shoo-in to win a second term. 'The people' are upset about these wars and military conflicts, losing their homes and jobs, high-ass gas prices and everything else. Bush is not getting the blame, Barack. They are looking at you! Remember, you were supposed to bring 'change!'

Barack: Yep.

Michelle: Let me leave you with this before you run off to another meeting - I heard Jay Leno make a couple of thought-provoking jokes about you.

Barack: What?

Michelle: Leno joked, "President Obama is going to seek re-election. His slogan this time? 'Change you can believe in. This time I promise. Really.'"

Barack: (smiling)

Michelle: And he joked, "President Obama said in an interview over the weekend that he really misses being anonymous. He said, 'I miss Saturday mornings rolling out of bed and not shaving, going to the market...' Be careful what you wish for, 2012 is just around the corner!"

Barack: (not smiling)

Michelle: There won't be a John McCain/Sarah Palin ticket to stroll to victory against next time!

Barack: Pretty harsh words, Michelle.

Michelle: Stick to the script, Barack! Stick to the damn script!

Stay Tuned for More 'Morning Conversations...' with Barack & Michelle Obama, next time!

Copyright 2011 - Dexter Yarbrough

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Comments 21 comments

WillStarr profile image

WillStarr 5 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

What is so great about your musings is the ring of truth. I suspect that your imaginary conversation was probably very close to what was said in the Obama household after his major gaffe.

I especially liked the part about respecting private conversations. Whatever happened to honor?

Voted up and awesome!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thanks, Will Starr. You are right. I attempt to get a non-political message across that folks of any political leaning can get (sometimes I am successful, sometimes not). Having honor and respecting privacy is the message! Thanks so much, sir!


PK2010 profile image

PK2010 5 years ago from United Kingdom

I don't follow World politics that much, but I can only envisage how Obama's dream of hope and his ideology of "yes we can" has turned into a nightmare of "after all we can't". Everything has began to crumble around him. I should read your morning conversations from chapter 1. Will do. This one makes a great read. Lots of wit and humour here, and I bet you are not far from the truth. Loved it.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thanks, Anthea! You are so right about his ideology. I hope you like the others and you will undoubtedly find some other truths in the humor. Thanks, again!


breakfastpop profile image

breakfastpop 5 years ago

I agree with WillStarr, this conversation probably happened. It's pathetic.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thanks for checking it out, Breakfastpop.


N.E. Wright profile image

N.E. Wright 5 years ago from Bronx, NY

Hey Dexter,

Another great read. LOL.

To be honest I did not hear about him calling public workers a slug. Not good.

I must admit I did not have a problem with the rest. Not even the part about his telling his donors how he let the GOP know he would not let them nickel and dime him.

The GOP leaders allow their own party members to question his legitimacy and do not shoot it down at all. Liberals act like he is the punk of the century no matter what.

The moment he agrees with something the GOP likes or even comes up with they change it. They make deals with him and change it all the time. They diss him completely and he is not suppose to be human, and talk about it. He is not perfect. He should have checked the mic. LOL.

Still, sad to say, it may take another century for true fairness for Presidents of color.

Again, enjoyed this insightful and funny read.

Take Care,

N.E.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi N.E.! You are right. The GOP does try and marginalize him and I give him credit for standing up to them. Thanks for checking this out!


N.E. Wright profile image

N.E. Wright 5 years ago from Bronx, NY

No problem.

Keep it coming. LOL.

Take Care,

N.E.


steven m. gallo 5 years ago

Dexter, you have great insight to what must have transpiered in the Obama household. Let us all hope and pray that the Lord gives the President the strenght, courage and wisdom to make great decisions.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thanks, Cousin Steve! I appreciate you reading my work!


Ghost32 5 years ago

Awesome, Dexter. I was up on the "WHAT private conversations" part but had missed the federal slugs goodie.

Man, he tells the truth for once, and see what THAT gets him? Now he's gone and lost the slug vote!

Up and Stuff.


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

So true! Thanks for reading Ghost.


Ashantina profile image

Ashantina 5 years ago

...as Willstar says theres such a ring of truth to these convo's...

Up n UP!!

Back soon for the next installment :)


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Hi Ashantina! Glad you enjoyed it!


Jo_Goldsmith11 profile image

Jo_Goldsmith11 5 years ago

LOL I wonder if they really do talk to each other like that. I love this idea! bravo!!


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Thank you so much, Jo!


epigramman profile image

epigramman 5 years ago

..well Mister D - this will be your artistic/creative legacy - you should be represented in the library of congress with this series (if they have a sense of humor) and I think your writing here - this concept - is truly a work of genius in terms of satire and human nature of what goes on behind closed doors. Hubbravo to you sir!

lake erie time 1:23am and listening to some mighty righteous blues music at the moment with a full moon over my lake .


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 5 years ago from United States Author

Epi! You made my day with your wonderful comments. Thank you so much!


Lesleysherwood 4 years ago

I thought they did play XBOX and Playstation in the Oval Office, don't they?

O well, I'm British, what would I know:(


Dexter Yarbrough profile image

Dexter Yarbrough 4 years ago from United States Author

They play some games in the Oval Office all the time, I believe! lol

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