Good job "programming" your husband to create mutual compliments. I would call what you do (and my wife and I do it to), mutual compliments.
Other opposites of a back-handed compliment:
To another person:
- a straightforward compliment
- a straightforward insult
- a cutting remark (backhanded insult)
Or, if the "opposite" is that you direct it towards yourself:
- cursing oneself out
- sly self-aggrandizement
- subtle self-put-down
So many ways to create opposites!