I definitely agree with the natural selfishness kicks it. Definitely comes with the territory. The individual is now removing themselves or the fact of any association/connection they once had with the person. I think it comes off as selfishness but it's like confirmation to self. Especially if you were unconditionally supportive to that individual.
It's really hard to counteract your natural selfishness because thinking about self and tending to self is a natural reaction that some how allows you to separate yourself from them. But if you truly love that person you will revert from those actions and thinking once the hurt subsides.
Vonda G. Nelson