Randy Behavior interview A.I.D.Y.
Hi Sandy (AIDY to all us Hubbers), come in, come in. Thank you for agreeing to this interview. You know from my interview that you are one of my very favorite, albeit ever so mysterious, poetesses. If you’ve made yourself comfortable I’d like to just dive in.
1. Cute hat in your avatar, but why won't you show us your face?
Woah! You sure don't beat around the bush! Well, to answer--its complicated.
If you can remember my published work 'et cetera' on Eye on Life Magazine, describes my typical day. I always give hints in my work of how I truly am. So each written piece is an actual truth. By not showing my face affords me the anonymity I need to keep me safe. In truth, with my writing, I tell everyone everything about me, then nothing at all. It is difficult and it takes a while for me to 'learn' people so I do what I can to keep personal interaction to a minimum. Imagine if people knew me from my pictures online and come up to me and start asking questions! I shutter to even think of it!
2. For those that haven't read "et cetera" yet, what happens in a typical day of AIDY?
I have a diagnosed social anxiety disorder that complicates my interactions with people on a personal level or I am an Aspie (Asperger Syndrome) which complicates my personal and interpersonal relationships; I can become easily overwhelmed. So I am extremely shy. I struggle daily to handle mundane tasks, like going to school, the store, work, etc. I am constantly bombarded with questions (mentally, on what to do, how to say it, should I say it) to a point I can get distracted and it would seem that I am not paying attention to what someone is saying. So I have a developed routine that I must stick to or my entire day is kaputt!
3. So, AIDY is a strange name, but “Am I dead yet?”, from which it came, is even stranger. Would you like to explain why you picked such an ominous name?
The AIDY part evolved from the Hub community. I guess it was much nicer to 'type' AIDY then 'Am I dead, yet?' I nearly cannot explain as to why I choose that name. I believe that every time I dreamed of waking, I asked myself that very question. Wanting the worry and fear to go away; so shadows no longer followed me where ever I went. So the stress of a new day or worrying about tomorrow and existing only in isolation would end when I am dead. So in wishing it to be so at times, is in itself a blessed dream or foretold nightmare.
4. Sometimes you throw German in your work. Where does this influences come from?
I love the German language. One of my 'things' is that I am obsessed with certain words. Give me a word I have never heard of before, and I would obsess over how to say it, how it should sound, the meaning of the word, how it is used in writing, in conversation. German sounds powerful, in speaking. Where I am silent in writing, my use of a German word 'shouts' what I am trying to say in not actually having to say it. If that makes sense?
Words are my private fascination or my passion.
5. I was gonna ask you to tell us your favorite hub of all you've written, but where have all your writings gone? Is there yet another name we should look under to find your creative stylings? Maybe you have some other websites that house your work you'd like to share ? Here's your chance; spam us.
My favorite poem would have to be 'Untergang' or 'sinking,' 'destruction,' or 'downfall.' As it remind me of myself the most. I have two web sites actually, one will be for a new project I am working on (animation) and for all my old stuff and new stuff, you can find me at my site. Still a work in progress, so if anyone wanted to say 'hello' you know where I am. I'm found in other places too on the web; including the Hub as A.I.D.Y & Notmyself. My website merely combined the two 'Hub-alities.'
6. It is traditional to ask you, your favorite Hubbers of all time, but I'm not going to. Instead I'd like to know what new talent you’ve discovered on HubPages. Maybe one's that have only been here a few months that you find intriguing.
As far as talent on the HubPages, I will have to ask you to fill this part in for me. As I only frequent those I most favor; you (Randy Behavior), Tom (Rubenoff), Cris A, Michelle (Frieda Babbley) & Cindyvine. I can only attach myself to a few people at a time. I cannot overwhelm myself reading from too many people. Each of you struck a specific uniqueness quality that I liked in reading your work. I am selfish this way.
In that, your work is deeply personal and has a powerful aspect that I can find only through you--reading you enables me. I can repair myself. If that makes any sense.
I adore Tom's work because he always uses the most fantastic words in his writing--It is like brain candy reading his poetry. He is purely brilliant at manipulating verse. He is a genius.
Cris A, cater to the hopeless romantic that is deep within me. A person I am still trying to find. It is as if he speaks to my inner lover, and she is always pleased to hear word from him.
Michelle & Cindy are like the mother figures I never had. I find in reading their advise articles and poems are like reading a guidance manual; a subtle tutor, like a hand on my shoulder that lets me know that its okay...its okay.
7. Sandy can you tell us about your family... Is there a Mr. Dead Yet or any baby Yets?
I'm sorry, you must ask the right question. Its complicated.
8. Ahh, there’s the mysterious AIDY, we know and love. How about this then, are you married or shacked up?
I am single. I live alone.
9. Tell us what your guilty pleasures are. What consumes the mind of AIDY when she should be listening to a lecture.
Ritter Sport chocolate & gaming. I am a obsessive gamer. While in class, I think of things to write about in my composition notebook, I try to fill or write through one each week. Watching people, learning how they react and interact. I try to learn things from them about things that I would never get to do. Be normal.
Thank you so much for sharing yourself with us. You didn't try and duck out on one question, and I asked some tough ones! I applaud your bravery and honesty. Do you have any last words you'd like to leave us with, as I'm a little speechless at this point.
I have to say that my life is not of my own choice; it is a life that I was given, I deal with it in my own way. I know that I will never be normal and I do not expect any one to understand why I feel the way I do. But we all are imperfect and yet we are all blessed with gifts that benefit each and everyone. I know that we all can't be normal. I write the way I do to remind myself, and others that we need to seek and understand the flaws and differences within ourselves, first, before finding flaws and differences in others. Understanding that these flaws are what make us all unique, human.
What could be more normal than that?
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