People losing their job

1. 47

   sandradeeposted 15 years ago

   How do you console a person who was with a company for five years and got suspended and then terminated?

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   1. 48

      dmyers7usposted 15 years agoin reply to this

       
      
      I think the best thing to do is to be supportive and try to be a cheerleader for them.  Point out all the things they may have learned in the role and talk about how they can turn this negative occurence into a positive.  Also, just listen if they need to vent or wallow for a bit so they can get it off their chest then pass on any good leads to a new position their way.

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   2. 56

      Rosa Bergerposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I think one must understand that loosing one's job requires a period of grief. It is a tremendous loss because for most people, at least part of their identity is directly connected to their job. If one looses one's job, one also loosen part of one's identity. Hence, the necessary period of grieving.
      
      In addition, I would point out how to find a new job. The job market - and the finding of jobs - has changed tremendously over the last few years. A couple good books from a bookstore will keep your friend busy and inspire him/her with new ideas. Hopefully, s/he will find something better than what s/he had. Good luck!

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      1. 83

         rebekahELLEposted 15 years agoin reply to this

         very helpful advice ~~ positive support, encouraging words, starbucks gift card, a lunch date... I would also encourage some time to reflect and refocus before trying to jump back into the job search.

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   3. 72

      AEvansposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      It depends on what they were suspended and terminated for, it would be complicated for me to console anyone who was negligent with there work ethics so it would really just depend.

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      1. 84

         gmwilliamsposted 9 years agoin reply to this

         Exactly, if the person was suspended, it was for cause- a disciplinary issue at work.  Then he was terminated-again for cause and in relation to the disciplinary issue which probably escalated.  It is quite commonplace for companies to terminate people after successive disciplinary issues.  First, verbal counseling then written counseling then suspension and if the behavior does not improve or escalate, then goodbye nice knowing you.   The only way to "console" the person is to wake him up to reality.  Tell him that he has burnt his career bridges so to speak.  If he was terminated for cause and there is a suspension on his record, his career chances are irrevocably damaged and ruined.  There is nothing better for him over the career horizon.  He will be lucky if he is hired for a minimum wage Mcjob.  Employers do not want people who have been terminated/fired from their jobs; they want employees with excellent, perfect, and UNBLEMISHED work records.

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   4. 0

      sneakorocksolidposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      It's a sign he wasn't in the right place!

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   5. 63

      sensu0sposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      My parents says jobs are always selfish. They will hire you when they need you and when you have something to offer in return. Once you are exhausted and lost the cream ... you will be scrapped like a dead leaf from a green tree.

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   6. 57

      Hawkeyedubaiposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      Without knowing the reason for termination it is difficult to address this issue. However, no matter what the reason I think I would help them examine what their achievements were during the five years and through this hopefully they will see they have much to offer a future employer. They need to concentrate on their strenghts and have confidence they can demonstrate this to a future employer. They must gain value and strenght from their experience.

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   7. 60

      Jane@CMposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      It is hard to say, not knowing the circumstances.  My hubby was laid off after 17 years with the same company.  Yes, you go through a period of grieving, yes, you get angry and yes, patience becomes very hard.  Offer you ear to listen, help network if you can...just be a good friend

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   8. 0

      AdviceDoctorposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I'm a psychiatrist, so I'm going to fill you up with some shrink babble.
      
      When a person loses his or her job, they lose around 80% of their self image. They get a shattered self image, which is of course not good, and it doesn't matter if you've worked for some company for 1 year or 50 years, you always take it as near you as you possibly can.
      Having no job can lead you to loneliness (since you're not working all day with coworkers, people who are NOT your family) and you get lazier, which means you have less enthusiasm to find a new job. Also, alot of people don't believe in "beginning at the bottom", but there is nothing wrong with being a 43 year old Costco cashier. Anyway, this person you're asking advice for, my advice is just get him or her to find a new job as soon as possible. Tell him or her to apply EVERYWHERE!
      
      Hope I helped.

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2. 59

   itcollposted 15 years ago

   say to him that a better job awaits him.he might even turn to work at home jobs.There are so many opportunities out there.

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3. 68

   TINA Vposted 15 years ago

   Being terminated from work doesn't mean that it is the end of the world.  Hubber itcoll is right.  There are so many opportunities out there. As the saying goes "It is not the times that we stumble and fall that counts but it is the times that we rise from each fall that matters."
   
   I have articles about finding the right job that might help you or your friend.  If you have time, you might want to visit  my hubpage.
   
   Goodluck!

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   1. 84

      gmwilliamsposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Disagree, being terminated IS the end of the world, particularly if the person has a history of being disciplined i.e. suspended.  Anyone who has been terminated/fired has his/her career ruined and destroyed irrevocably.

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4. 62

   Lisa HWposted 15 years ago

   I think all you can do is acknowledge that it's a difficult time, and that s/he will have a period of adjustment and sense of loss; but that lots of people go through it, find a new job/way to earn an income, and that (when it comes down to it) all that really matters is that we're healthy.  As with any loss, the person is "entitled" to a little "mental confusion" and feeling knocked for a loop for a while.  As with any loss, I think the person needs to process the whole thing and find his/her own way to sorting out what needs to be sorted out.

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5. 69

   easyspeakposted 15 years ago

   People being laid off should look at doing sales as an option.  CNBC reported that companies are still hiring sales people, because they are the ones bringing revenue and they can't afford to lose them or not hire them.
   
   It's difficult, but I have some hubs on sales jobs that might help you find courage to maybe go out and try it.
   
   It doesn't require a degree or advanced education and there is no lid on income.  Yes, you have to be good to make a lot money, but who know?  You may have it in you.

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6. 0

   Denno66posted 15 years ago

   I flipped my finger at the company that let me go and enrolled in college. Problem solved for two years anyhow.

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   1. 68

      wyanjenposted 15 years agoin reply to this

      I flipped my finger. I still had to go back to work though.
      
      Seriously, even though I am still on a venomous rant, what do you think about underemployment? I DO try to keep a cool head because others in my spot have different situations than I do, but I'm in one of my boiling over phases today.
      
      I have this convo every now and then with people. My point is, I would rather have been laid off or terminated than to be in the spot I'm in right now.
      I'm still working full time but I can't get my bills paid with the lower salary.
      I can't get a second job because of the commitment to the first one (That is to say I haven't yet found a second job that will work out)
      I can't shop for a new position at another company because there have been so many going out of business. Too many folks applying, not enough being hired.
      
      I'm far from stupid I just haven't figured out how I'm going to make this work (yet?)
      
      

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7. 63

   sensu0sposted 15 years ago

   I would personally advice to go for a self employment or be a freelancer.

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8. 60

   coltrane36posted 15 years ago

   I agree with AdviseDoctor.
   
   I have recently gone through this and have found that the most important thing to do is to try and remain positive. Easily said, more difficult to accomplish. Take a look at the perspective of; "Is it 8% unemployment or 92% employment?".
   
   It is very important that when you try and get back into the job market that you are positive and confident. Lack of confidence and negativity show on the face and in body language. There are not many organizations looking for the down-and-out negative types who are not confident in what they have to offer.

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