I'd like feedback on my Hub: Inventing Wisely and Economically = highly profitab

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   Inventingposted 9 years ago

   Hi Hubbers,
   
   There is no spam or flaws in my Information and wisdom sharing Hub
   
   I appreciate passing the Quality Assessment Process.
   Will you please give feedback on my Hub Inventing Wisely and Economically = highly profitable Investments' Opportunities!
   Amnon M Cohen.
   
   What do you think I can do, so to improve?
   Thanks!

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      relacheposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      I'm pretty sure you have a "flaw," also known as a spelling or typographical error, in the title.  Along with what Paul said.

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   Paul Maplesdenposted 9 years ago

   Here's my advice, based on a quick read-through of your hub:
   
   - It is not clear what your hub is about; you should start with an introduction and summary of what readers can expect to find
   - It is not clear what the header image is meant to be for or how it relates to the hub
   - You drop straight into an external website link; this is not good practice and people will have no idea where they are clicking through to
   - The paragraph following this link is *extremely* long, break it up into smaller chunks to make it easier to read
   - You have several sentences in that paragraph over 70 words long, one is 200 words long; you should split your sentences into much shorter phrases
   - It appears that you are writing from a 'stream of consciousness' rather than providing useful information to your reader; you could probably remove two thirds of your text and be able to get your message across
   - You seem to move between topics with dizzying speed, bringing in new things and trying to explain them all
   - Focus on one specific theme that your hub is exploring, explain the problem to the reader and then set out a step-by-step guide on how they can solve that problem.
   
   Good luck.

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   1. 62

      Inventingposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks Paul, for your advice.
      You did note note, that English is not my natural language, but natural logic is.  I grew up with Eevreet/Hebrew where there is structure and no limitations in writing a thought and fact in accurate way, including proper names of people and places plus truth.  (Note, Eevreet is the proper name of Hebrew, no need to Anglicize.)
      After 45 years of working with English, I know I shall never be able to use it for conveying my wisdom nor my content.  This is why my sentences are long, as these follow a thought.  I try not to write books, so I compound my thoughts and information in long sentences.  As you cite, it is a confusing style, unclear, long-winded; yet I hope the reader, after 3 times, will capture it.
      I still can not write without a spellchecker, but the limitations of such software will show through my writings.
      In my hub, I try to share information on what is yet new and unknown, so it does not add up as clear as needed and in simple proper way, as you sighted and suggested in your detailed advice.
      
      I thank you for your advice, yet I must apologize for my inability to write in English, in a more powerful concise or poetic way — for sharing my gifted knowledge plus insights in the arts of modern options for investing and inventing new products and services.
      
      At the same time, I shall take time to rewrite as to your suggestions, with the understanding, others are not benefiting from my shared help to modern inventors and investors.

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   psycheskinnerposted 9 years ago

   I tried to read the hub but after 10-12 sentences that conveyed no meaning at all to me I gave up (and I read academic papers including those by non-native speakers on a daily basis).  I suggesting being more direct and simple in what you are saying, and breaking into more paragraphs.
   
   Also you plug two of your own websites very hard in that opening section.  That is probably considered spammy.

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      Inventingposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      es, sorry, there is too much content compounded into my hub, and the links are to samples of what is needed in modernizing the patenting industry.
      A hub can not replace the vast new information, reasoning, experience and wisdom gathered into the new method.  Just the Global Taxation Treaty is a book by itself.  Try to put all the patent system information into a short hub…   …and you will realize why I know it takes 3 times to 5 times reading, to capture my thinking and the innovations of the pre-patent pre-partnering proposal method.
      I do hope investors and inventors see more value then casual readers of the hub = my apologies, but if you are one of both (inventor/investor) more personal help can be offered at no costs other then time and effort.

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   psycheskinnerposted 9 years ago

   I am not saying don't link.  I am saying make the hub have value and link in a non-spammy way at the end of the hub (not the beginning).
   
   Great understanding allows people to create clear messaging even about complex subjects.
   
   One of my professors had students present their PhD thesis topic to seven-year-olds at a local school as a test of whether they were ready to begin their research.

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      Inventingposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks.
      Not all links are spam, and for information reasons I am sharing these to start with, as these are not the objective as it will be if I add them in the end — even as added references. (At least, this is what I am thinking.)
      YES, with too much content, it is not simple for me to create clearer messaging with my complex subject, but I shall keep editing and try.
      Thanks again, as each point helps.
      Respectfully yours, 
      Amnon

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