Have you encountered a not-so-friendly hubber? How did you deal with him/her?
I know there are a lot of awesome people here. But there are still times when we encounter hubbers who are a bit rude. What's your experience?
I had a really rude answer given to one of my questions once. I didn't respond to it and left it how it was. It didn't take very long before the answer started to get down voted. When I checked back, the answer was gone. I'm not sure if the person deleted it or it was otherwise removed (still learning about HubPages).
I figure that, by receiving so many down votes and subsequently removing your answer, a lesson had to be learned that the type of language and attitude displayed was not acceptable and probably won't happen again anytime soon.
It's a good thing the comment was removed. Also, besides rude comments, I also dislike responses marked with sarcasm (hidden rudeness). And, sadly, it seems like some people are fond of leaving those kinds of comments.
Of course the other alternative, yougotme, is to take the sarcastic comment, laugh, and write a hub about it!
For the most part this doesn't happen, but sometimes, particularly if it's a hot button subject like politics or religion, it can bring out the worst in people's passions.
I work to keep conversations as civil as possible, knowing that sometimes we disagree. I'd rather have someone who disagrees with a hub or question etc. state in dignified fashion why they disagree. After all, many types of opinions exist and it's nice to consider others views. What I don't tolerate is sarcasm and being mean. We can make points without being condescending.
I will admit I've made responses a couple of times that others took as "rude" - simply because I disagreed. for example one was a response I made to a blanket statement that said atheists are not moral people are more or less to blame for societies problems and we need to have prayer in school again. I told the poster that her answer is insulting to atheists as a whole (because it is!) and she took that as rude and promptly took apart one of my hubs and twisted my words around... This is where things cross the line.
Yes you can disagree - and disagreeing is not insulting. We don't have to candy coat everything we say, but we can disagree in ways that respect other people. My thought on this particular exchange was that this lady had no right to insult an entire group of people and blame things on them, it was unfair and thus insulting - her response was that since I said her statement was insulting - that I somehow meant she was a bad person.
Keep in mind, we are also reading responses here. Sometimes things get misinterpreted also. I try to keep that in mind when reading anything here - so as not to overreact to an unintended slight.
With those who are blatantly rude, I delete their answers and comments - no need to keep them around, it isn't going to teach them anything. I don't want nasty comments to degrade a good hub or conversation or answers so I delete and move on with my life
My biggest pet peeve is the passive aggressive thumbing down of answers people simply don't agree with! That happens ALL the time and is very annoying. If an answer contributes to the question it doesn't deserve a thumbs down, unless it is rude, spammy, or off topic.
To some extent you simply need thick skin on the internet. The internet lacks the civility present in face-to-face interactions. It is also important to preserve your emotions for things that matter. Don't waste emotional effort on people who just aren't worth it. People who are rude and offer nothing of value aren't worth an effort. Ignore them, delete their answers, or simply let them know that you will respond if and when they can formulate a civil and valuable comment.
The people that irk me are the ones who actually make somewhat decent points, but only seem able to do so if it is laced with insults. If you have point, make it, but the insults just get in the way of communication. I don't really get it.
I have to admit, I can be somewhat obnoxious. I love sarcasm, mockery, and satire. Can't live without it. However, I generally only apply it to ideas (rather than people) and I don't ever say something I wouldn't willingly say face-to-face. Am I rude? Maybe, but if I am let me know. That is part of the issue as well. We all have different ways of communicating and different tolerances. Sometimes we just don't know.
There was once a hubber whom I thought was unfriendly to me. I made it a habit to read some articles from that hubber, and left positive, encouraging, friendly comments. Either my feelings have changed or that hubber has changed but of late, I don't feel offended anymore.
If you cannot reason with them and tell them you are willing to discuss but not argue and that the discussion was going to stay on topic, then I will continue to deal with them.
If they write something and expect me to spend two or three hours answering all their points, I tell them I cannot devote this much time.
I have asked one hubber to quit following me.
One hubber was so out of line I just ended the discussion.
The ones that expect a response to the level of a dissertation cannot be sated. The most intelligent, educated person in the world will not be able provide a satisfactory answer.
Some will infer whatever they can spin from your statements. The more you write, the more you're wrong; being factually correct has nothing to do with it.
I had disagreed with a person who was considered good enough to receive a Hub Nugget. She refused to accept what I had written as it was written. She even went as far as to delete some of my comments to manipulate the appearance of our conversation in her favor.
But she had many more followers supporting her; as far as I know I was the only one disagreeing. Maybe I was the unfair one, but whatever the case, the best course of action was for me to stop commenting as it was only making things worse.
No matter how nonsensical it may seem or how 'right' I am or how passionate my heart is, unless they are violating tou, I simply stop engaging.
Well, I didn't on this site but i have some really mean girls from my school and they always bullied me and I stop paying attention to them and just continue my life!! I guess you should stop paying attention too and act like nothing ever happened, trust me you'll be happier than ever!!
Yes today I had my first run in and at first I just ignored his rude comments to 2 of my questions, but the more I thought about it I really was upset by it so I commented on his post spoke my mind never being rude the least bit and moved on then his next comment just earned him a negative rating and I moved on. I try not to become what he is for that makes me look like something I not.
Do your own thing. How do you deal with a not-so-friendly person in real life? It is the same concept. Reason if you can, if that doesn't work just ignore. If ignoring doesn't work then just embarrass them in front of everyone or just tell them they are being mean and not following hubpages guidelines.
Yeah I did, he tried to pick an argument with me on a post and you know debate is fine but he was extremely personal in how he did it. Asked for help on here and the general advice was to just ignore the comment and move on, and it worked really well. I think you'll always come across the odd bad apple wherever you go, just keep going and ignore them. After all, we do have the deny button for comments thank goodness!
I don't know if this incident will be categorized of being mean. You see, kabayan, I respected this hubber so much but when I post a remark on his hub regarding 'homosexuality' (based from the Bible), he deleted it twice.
He didn't wanted my remarks. That will also mean he didn't want me, either.
There are many spammers posting spammy links on my hubs. I patiently delete their posts, so that the Hub Score will not suffer and the reputation of my individual hub will be free from such alterations.
Not till now, as i found all of the hubber friends quite friendly here. But if in future I face this kind of a situation i would like to reply positively.
by starme77 9 years ago
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