I wanna have the feedback

1. 38

   Maikel Helenposted 6 years ago

   Hey, I submitted this content a couple of time but got the rejection. So, I wanna have your advice to improve the content. Now, I've changed it, is it ok? https://hubpages.com/travel/15-Best-Saf … or-Seniors

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   1. 88

      theraggededgeposted 6 years agoin reply to this

      Hi there,
      
      There are many grammatical errors throughout the article. You could try pasting the text into Grammarly (free online) to fix some of them.
      
      You also have to remember who your reader is. So you have to tone down the style a little bit. For example, the first sentence, "While talking to traveling, there is an insane feeling in my mind because I’m crazy for traveling."
      
      There's no need to use extreme descriptors, especially if you are writing for middle-age or elderly people.
      
      "When talking about traveling, I get so excited--there's nothing better than going on a trip to a new place."
      
      A 'medical study' is a different thing to a 'medical examination'
      
      There's a lot of work to be done on this article, but good luck with it.

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2. 38

   Maikel Helenposted 6 years ago

   Thanks a lot for your cooperation!

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3. 38

   Maikel Helenposted 6 years ago

   Hey, theraggededge! I have changed the content...If you don't mind, could you check it again?https://hubpages.com/travel/15-Best-Safe-Travel-Tips-for-Seniors

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   1. 81

      sallybeaposted 6 years agoin reply to this

      here are still too many grammatical errors.  It is unlikely to be featured in its current form unless you either download Grammarly or paste the text into Word to review it.  Try reading the hub out aloud to yourself.  If I were elderly I might take offense if I was referred to as an 'aged person'.

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      1. 38

         Maikel Helenposted 6 years agoin reply to this

         Thanks!

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      2. 89

         Jean Bakulaposted 6 years agoin reply to this

         I agree. Especially in a time during history where many of us don't even let our hair get gray! We don't need to be reminded of our health issues, aching bones, and limitations. Some dignity, please.

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         1. 92

            Rochelle Frankposted 6 years agoin reply to this

              I know you are posting this with a smile.
            I don't mind. My hair is greying, I have occasional minor aches but don't feel  limited in what I want to do. I still have some dignity, even if it is only in my  own mind.

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4. 91

   Natalie Frankposted 6 years ago

   Yes, for those of us struggling with the realization that we aren't as young as we once were, your article could be worded better.  If your English isn't great or near perfect (something needed to succeed on HP) you can overcome this problem if you have a friend who is a native English speaker read and edit the article for grammar and wording choice.  Good luck with the article.  I hope you get it featured without two much pain!  Don't give up - there are always ways to correct for our weaknesses if we look hard enough and if you persevere I have no doubt you will succeed.

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