Article fine tuning

  1. Peter Strahm profile image82
    Peter Strahmposted 6 years ago

    I would like feedback on my article


    https://hubpages.com/travel/Eating-off- … own-Mexico

    It is featured but I want to receive criticism. I grew up receiving harsh criticism from four older siblings so don't feel bad about being blunt

    1. TIMETRAVELER2 profile image73
      TIMETRAVELER2posted 6 years agoin reply to this

      OK...I took a quick look.  You write beautifully, but I think you should have stuck to the food descriptions.  You weren't specifically writing about  one small town, but at the end you kind of threw in a brief description of it.  Also, you left out one very important point...most US citizens should not eat food that is sold off of street carts because it is very easy to get sick from it.  The main reason is that crops there are fertilized with human excrement.  I've been there and when I went, I visited a friend who is a medical doctor.  HE is a native and HE is the one who told me this.  He warned that I should never eat any food unless it came from a higher end restaurant.  I think you really should place this warning in your hub.  You may be one of those people who has immunity to this issue, but most people do not.

    2. Eurofile profile image71
      Eurofileposted 6 years agoin reply to this

      As I still feel like a relatively inexperienced hubber myself, I am a little hesitant in giving advice. But, as you asked, here goes. I found the mix of tenses in the first paragraph a little confusing. Is it in the present or the past tense? I noticed the odd typo. I was advised early on to download a free version of Grammarly, which has helped me a lot. No matter how many times I read through an article, the odd error still sneaks in. My early hubs came back with loads of editing suggestions. From those, I have altered my style a little. The editors seemed to favor a titled text followed by a relevant untitled photo capsule, with the photo description written below the source. Do you have any photos of the stalls to illustrate your text capsule after you have eaten as much as you can? Your last two paragraphs didn't quite fit with the rest of the hub. I can see where you are going with them, but they need to be integrated and linked in more with the food theme of the hub. Maybe this information is more suited to an introduction at the beginning, leaving you to summarise your experience at the end. I hope this helps.

 
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