I'd like feedback on my article: Birthday Vacation Ideas

1. 32

   Nik Kalwaniposted 4 years ago

   Hi Hubbers,
   
   I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my article? What can I do to improve? Thanks!
   Here is my article: Birthday Vacation Ideas (must be signed in to view)

   replyreport
2. 78

   theraggededgeposted 4 years ago

   Hi there,
   
   I think your introduction is a little vague and makes an odd claim. What do you mean by, "Well honestly you don't need to spend much on a trip. Well having a very luxurious trip is another thing. But if you throw a party instead, you will have to spend at least twice."
   
   There are way too many variables to say that a party costs twice as much as a trip. A trip might be a cruise. A party might be five people in a pub. In fact, the examples you have listed would cost a great deal more than the average party.
   
   You have to be careful, when writing articles, not to overlay your personal vision. Because what is true for you, is not the same for everyone. I know this because I do it all the time. It's easy to think that your reader's life and viewpoint is similar to your own.
   
   The article needs proofreading. There are many errors. One subtitle is repeated. You have not cited the source of your images - you can't take images from the internet as you please, they must have a Creative Commons license.
   
   Suggesting people do a search is not a good idea. Your article needs to give all the information necessary. For instance, the cost of taking a trip to Norway will be huge if you live in Australia, but much cheaper if you live in the UK.
   
   My feeling is that you have over-extended yourself with this topic. You've chosen four random destinations and not thought it through properly. There is not enough information on each place.
   
   Edit: I notice your bio says you are a travel blogger. Have you been to these places? If so, you should add your personal experience of staying there.

   replyreport
3. 77

   Robie Benveposted 4 years ago

   Hi Nick,
   honestly, to the random reader looking for vacation ideas and ending up on your article, it may look really limited as far as ideas go. Only three, and not many details.
   Maybe you can broaden the category of each idea and then post that specific place as an example.
   Like: Tropical Paradise  > Example: Mauritius
   European Beach + History > Example: Santorini
   etc
   Also, there are several typos and errors. I use Grammarly.com, and it helps me proof-read my articles. You may want to try it too.

   replyreport
4. 94

   AliciaCposted 4 years ago

   Hi, Nik. Another problem that I noticed is that you've listed Norway as the fourth place to visit but haven't said anything about the country. It seems strange that you've described the first three places in your list but not the fourth.

   replyreport
5. 32

   Nik Kalwaniposted 4 years ago

   Thanks a lot for noticing the problems in the article and letting me know. Thanks for the suggestions as well. I'll fix my article as soon as possible.

   replyreport