I like the post a few days ago from fierycj. He related a chivalrous act of when he defended a damsel in (sexual harassment) distress. That got me thinking.
What characteristics make a "mere male" into a real MAN?
Share some thoughts please, (esp. ladies).
Chivalry, Humor,Kindness, Understanding and Patience
When he comes to understand where the boundaries are. Children, even adult children, haven't either a) figured this out yet, or b) have figured out where they are but enjoy violating them
A MAN has self control and refuses to violate boundaries, either someone's personal boundaries or those that society as a whole has agreed are necessary.
One who doesn't pass out when his wife is having a baby.... common men, why do you do that?
to me, what makes a man a real man as opposed to a mere male is a man who knows how to handle me, and who is in control of his emotions and other things. i don't mean a brawny guy who is arrogant...i mean a man who knows what it is to be a man and who can cut through all my personal crap and get to my creamy center. those men are hard to find but when i meet them, i don't usually forget them.
Honesty ,Respect,Kindness and open to further learning
Oh forgot to add ,really helps if he can cook
Ability to communicate, laugh and love with an open heart. Limited ego and confident in who he is...
Too much time is spent on being just female and just male with both the sexes, I think.
Intelligence--and using it, decency, self control, kindness, humility, the ability to be like a kid when it is appropriate, humor....all good traits, but not an exhaustive list!
edit*...oh, yeah, after reading eaglekiwi's response. I never think about this--I would hope we are past this stuff...but I've never been with a guy who couldn't 'take care of himself.' That to me means cooking, cleaning, doing their laundry, and ironing, etc.
Ahhh now that's a great point. My man is great round the house ... in as much as he more than matches my abilities to run a home.
However, he chooses not to cook, clean, wash, iron etc as much as is humanly possible. I like to stop and glare rather a lot
And Ralwus? That video ...
Well maybe this link will help you to understand.
I really don't think the qualities that make a real man out of a male are much different than the qualities that make a good woman. If you're kind, loving, decent, you take responsibility for your actions, you treat people only the way you'd like them to treat you, and you temper your desire for justice with mercy, that makes you a good person regardless of gender.
But I will add this. A real man is so secure in his masculinity, he doesn't need to act "macho" to prove anything, he's not intimidated by powerful women, feels no need to prove he's not "whipped," and he's not afraid to defy stereotypes associated with manliness.
Are you saying there is NO difference between them?
I'm saying that the concept(s) of "maleness" or "manliness" have been effectively made up by society. And I think it's silly to debate the differences that we ourselves built into these pseudo-definitions.
So we build( or destroy) on something already there ,yes?
Same and different ,aint it great!
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