Man or just MALE ?

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   aka-djposted 14 years ago

   I like the post a few days ago from fierycj. He related a chivalrous act of when he defended a damsel in (sexual harassment) distress. That got me thinking.
   What characteristics make a "mere male" into a real MAN?
   Share some thoughts please, (esp. ladies).

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      AEvansposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      
      
      Chivalry, Humor,Kindness, Understanding and Patience

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         aka-djposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Stop talking about me so soon.

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      Madame Xposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      When he comes to understand where the boundaries are. Children, even adult children, haven't either a) figured this out yet, or b) have figured out where they are but enjoy violating them
      
      A MAN has self control and refuses to violate boundaries, either someone's personal boundaries or those that society as a whole has agreed are necessary.

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      Lady_Eposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      One who doesn't pass out when his wife is having a baby.... common men, why do you do that?

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         Eaglekiwiposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Escaping like Houdini

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      cosetteposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      to me, what makes a man a real man as opposed to a mere male is a man who knows how to handle me, and who is in control of his emotions and other things. i don't mean a brawny guy who is arrogant...i mean a man who knows what it is to be a man and who can cut through all my personal crap and get to my creamy center. those men are hard to find but when i meet them, i don't usually forget them.

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   Eaglekiwiposted 14 years ago

   Honesty ,Respect,Kindness and open to further learning
   
   Oh forgot to add ,really helps if he can cook

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      aka-djposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      You might be losing me on the cooking bit. Willing to learn. Does that help?

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         Eaglekiwiposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         Are you a quick learner? lol

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   Ladybird33posted 14 years ago

   Ability to communicate, laugh and love with an open heart.  Limited ego and confident in who he is...

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   Leta Sposted 14 years ago

   Too much time is spent on being just female and just male with both the sexes, I think.
   
   Intelligence--and using it, decency, self control, kindness, humility, the ability to be like a kid when it is appropriate, humor....all good traits, but not an exhaustive list!
   
   edit*...oh, yeah, after reading eaglekiwi's response.  I never think about this--I would hope we are past this stuff...but I've never been with a guy who couldn't 'take care of himself.'  That to me means cooking, cleaning, doing their laundry, and ironing, etc.

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      frogdroppingposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Ahhh now that's a great point. My man is great round the house ... in as much as he more than matches my abilities to run a home.
      
      However, he chooses not to cook, clean, wash, iron etc as much as is humanly possible. I like to stop and glare rather a lot
      
      And Ralwus? That video ...

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   ralwusposted 14 years ago

   Well maybe this link will help you to understand.
   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTK-osudoR0

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   Valerie Fposted 14 years ago

   I really don't think the qualities that make a real man out of a male are much different than the qualities that make a good woman. If you're kind, loving, decent, you take responsibility for your actions, you treat people only the way you'd like them to treat you, and you temper your desire for justice with mercy, that makes you a good person regardless of gender.
   
   But I will add this. A real man is so secure in his masculinity, he doesn't need to act "macho" to prove anything, he's not intimidated by powerful women, feels no need to prove he's not "whipped," and he's not afraid to defy stereotypes associated with manliness.

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   Maddie Ruudposted 14 years ago

   Gender is a construct.

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      aka-djposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Are you saying there is NO difference between them?

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         Maddie Ruudposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         I'm saying that the concept(s) of "maleness" or "manliness" have been effectively made up by society.  And I think it's silly to debate the differences that we ourselves built into these pseudo-definitions.

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            rednckwmnposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            more like, we should ask what makes you an adult?

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            CabinGirlposted 14 years agoin reply to this

            That is pseudo true

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      earnestshubposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      With you Maddie.

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   Eaglekiwiposted 14 years ago

   Construct?
   
   So we build( or destroy) on something already there ,yes?
   
   Same and different ,aint it great!

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