well I I am the mom who pops in and out while kids are online. They do know this. My oldest is almost 15 and I do believe everyone deserves privacy so I do not butt on his chats or so on, thankfully he is so busy with sports he only spends limited time online daily. I believe this is about trust and communicating with your kids, if they are old enough to chat they are old enough to carry the responsibility
My kids have a laptop, it's the only computer they're allowed to use. On the laptop I have it set to the highest parental settings, only trusted websites will open and I've placed a list of websites they are allowed to visit on their desk. Any websites other than those on the list have to be pre-approved by my wife or myself.
This may sound strict to some parents, but I have 4 daughters and have seen too many teenagers getting in trouble on-line to not enforce a strict internet policy.
I have 3 kids my oldest is 15 but his an honest boy and i have never checked up on him, i don't want to pry but when he has a friends request on facebook i always ask who they are along with my other son who is always online. I sometimes check my middle sons laptop but his only in to games online and plays them sitting next to me so i know his safe. x
I use the Parental Control tools on all their computers. And since I'm the Administrator on their computers, I'm able to define acceptable contents and limit their computer time by configuring the settings from the control panel. The trick is to not give out my password, EVER!
There must be trust with your children. Allowing them some freedom and sharing online experiences with them together.
My wife and children are always doing stuff online together. They enjoyed each other's company and doing things together.
Trust can be earned when they are showing you they can be trusted, Share doing things online and they will know what you can teach them.
I too think that trust is key and that as parents we have the responsibility to place any sort of boundaries or parental controls on computers. But I also think that it starts early and often! If you haven't let your children know by the time they are 8 that mom and dad are involved in and aware of all that they view online than trying to enforce that at 15 is going to be tough! We have told our children that if they can't view it with one of us sitting next to them than it's not something they should view either. But we keep the computer in a family area so that they aren't alone with it either. No computers, phones or ipods in bedrooms prior to college years too. You have to live out what you expect your children to follow. We also had a plan for them if they view things with friends, outside our influence. We taught them how to walk away, turn away or go do something else...whether they followed through or not is between them and God. I can only hope the advice we gave them is something they have been able to act on. It's that trust thing again!
Lock everything down with admin controls. Install a very limited operating system and let your kid use only something with limited hardware, etc. Oh, and use blocking software to censor certain domains.
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