How do you influence what type of friends your child will want?
It shouldn't matter what kind of friends your child will want. The important thing is that they should make friends.
I do not want them to choose friends that will be a bad influence. I have to disagree with you Cristale. I think it does matter.
I have to agree with you xanzacow. I wouldn't let my kids be friends with just anybody. Part of my job as a parent is teach, inform and help direct my child to choose good people to be friends with.
I just try my best to teach them right from wrong and trust they will choose wisely when picking friends.
I talk to my daughter about characteristics of people and which are good and which are not good. I emphasize loyalty, honesty and trustworthiness. I figure if I did a good job of raising her, she will choose friends that are like her. She has and they all go to church regularly, don't sleep around, don't take drugs and don't drink. They are a nice group of kids that I don't think anyone can complain about.
We all want our children to have loyal and good friends, that treat them right and won't hurt them; unfortunately even children have to learn somethings the hard way.
Using stories is a good way of influencing a smaller child. Winnie The Pooh and his friends work for me.
I also think your general approach to life and how you deal with things and the people that are mostly around your child will influence them. The most important thing is that your child feels complete confidence in you and will tell you how things are going. Always ask your child how they are and what things the enjoyed about their day and if there was anything not so good.
And remember: some experiences have to be experienced and you can't change that, but you can be there to wipe away the tears and give them a cuddle. Your love and support is what matters.
By controlling the world around them. No public or private school. Just learning from home. When you take them to their extra activities (gymnastics, swimming, wrestling, sports, etc), they can make friends here but you still control where they have lessons and can choose a better environment.
Be being a positive role model and discussing with my children everything. And then biting my lip when they make choices and learn from them for themselves.
You surround YOURSELF with the right people so that your child experiences firsthand what a good person is. Then you start by surrounding them with good people, and as they grow, you talk to them, you answer their questions, they see you are happy in your relationships with your friends, and they will want the same things. You emulate. You are the example. It all starts with you.
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