Should you be able to discipline someone else's child?
How would you deal with someone else's child if they had done something terrible while in your care? You may be babysitting/child minding for a friend or relative or have visitors with children when something very bad happens that needs adult intervention. Do you treat them and the situation the same as you would your own child? Your house rules may be very different to someone else's, so what do you do?
I don't think there is anything wrong with asking another person's child to stop doing something or to point it out to the parent. If you are a caregiver, daycare, babysitter then it may need to go further into a timeout or taking something away. That is my 2 cents.
That's the way I was brought up (Generation X). Aunts, uncles, grandparents, and in some cases, neighbors were allowed to discipline unruly kids...and we were more respectful and better raised for it (http://beyond-politics.hubpages.com/hub … Ill-Travel)
You do the right thing, which is to discipline with love. This does not mean corporal punishment, but may mean giving a time out or taking a toy away, etc, depending on the age of the child.
Absolutely OK to intervene in naughty or unsafe behaviour. I always let children (now teens) who visit our home know our rules if a problem arisies such as we don't use cell phones during dinner. I remember giving our neighbours child when she was seven a short time out after she threw some food on the floor at a party because she didn't like it. She was fine and continued to vsiit. Oftentimes children like to know that there are rules and boundaries. Makes them feel safe. However the discipline must always be fairly done and never shame or humiliate the child.
If my job is to babysit a child and get paid, yes, I would discipline the child if he is in the wrong. If the child is under my care for a short while, no i won't do that he may complain to his mommy and argument may occur.
When one of my daughters friends comes to my house I think that they should know that there are certain rules in my house. Even if they are different then at home. One of my daughters friends will use a word often that I do not like. I tell her that she is not allowed to say that in my house. She says that she can at home. I let her know that it is ok to say it at home if her mom lets her, but not ok when she is with me. Usually she will stop or catch herself and say sorry. But I also expect my child to follow the rules while she is at her house.
I think the key is in defining discipline. Never use corporal punishment on someone else's child, even if you would use it on your own. One might make an exception if they have permission from the child's parents, but I would strongly advise learning new ways to discipline if you ever end up watching the children of non-spanking parents. Really, the best answer I would give is that, if all else fails, promise to tell the child's parents how they misbehaved, and let them come up with a punishment.
I recall once when my brother and I were being watched by a neighbor, my brother started throwing a tantrum. I don't remember why. When the neighbor started yelling at him, loyal big sister that I was, I started yelling at her to leave him alone. Our mother was told of the incident, and we both had to write letters apologizing for our behavior and thanking the neighbor for looking after us.
As I remember the incident, I admit I am still inclined to side with my childish self. Although I remember my brother could throw some epic tantrums, I also recall that this woman's children by her own admission were usually worse, and I remember plenty of times she sided with me over her own daughter. I expect my brother had simply had enough of her son and reached the breaking point.
by Shil1978 6 years ago
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