Should parents allow their children make their own mistakes?

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  1. Barine Sambaris profile image76
    Barine Sambarisposted 7 years ago

    Should parents allow their children make their own mistakes?

    Instead of over protecting/caging the child every time, shouldn't parents allow their children to see for themselves? I know some mistakes are quite costly but hey, experience is the best teacher.

  2. souvikm16 profile image77
    souvikm16posted 7 years ago

    It actually depends on quite a few factors. First and foremost being the age of your child at which this thought crosses your mind.
    Protecting or caging a child is preventing him from exploring the world and learning from it (And that includes the mistakes). A child at an young age needs to explore. That's how his wholesome development of the mind occurs.
    Looking at a hypothetical example:When a child first learns to walk, he would fall. You should be there to hold him should he fall, but he needs to walk again. If you prevent him from walking, then would it serve the purpose of his learning to walk? smile
    If the child is in adolescence or teenage then the situation needs to be dealt with a little more sensitively. Remember that this is the time in everyone's life when the rebel instincts actually take shape. Hence curbing their desires or their independence would only be detrimental and thus make them more determined to pursue their rebellious attitude. However timely watch over your child and effective communication, as and when it's required, are effective solutions to make sure that your child doesn't cross the line.
    Mistakes would be made no matter whether the child is caged or given complete freedom. But the mantra lies in the fact of letting your child know of the mistakes and ask them the question of what they have learnt from them. It's the parents duty to inform the child of the consequences of their mistakes.

  3. DDE profile image27
    DDEposted 7 years ago

    Parents should allow their children to experience their ups and downs life is not perfect mistakes are part of the learning experiences.

  4. peeples profile image94
    peeplesposted 7 years ago

    Yes and this should begin as early as possible. When I have told my 2 year old not to throw her toy down or it will have to go to the wash, she throws it down anyway and gets to learn that her mistake will cost her a day without her toy. My older children have had the same issues. Some may see it as too much but my 9 year old almost two months ago kept jumping in the pool. Not in a way that could kill him but I was worried about the side of the pool getting his feet. I told him this repeatedly. He didn't want to listen. So finally I told him he could do it but when he got hurt to remember I told him so. Sure enough 2 days later he went to jump in the pool and his foot caught the side metal of the pool. The result was 9 stitches and guess who hasn't jumped in the pool again! So long as it is not life threatening I let my children learn from their mistakes. It is my job to teach them about life, not shelter them from it.

  5. emilynemchick profile image92
    emilynemchickposted 7 years ago

    Speaking from the perspective of the child, I think yes - parents should allow children to learn through experience even if it means making mistakes. Although my mother was always there to offer advice if I asked, she never told me what to do - she might tell me she thought my decision was wrong, but she wouldn't stop me and she would support me in everything I did. I value that a lot.

    I think the key is that parents need to support their children. If a parent tries to control a child's decisions, especially as the child gets older, it encourages the child to break away and not to confide in the parent. By offering support even while gently saying they think the decision isn't great, a parent earns trust. I always listened to my mother's advice and respected her opinions, but in the end I had to learn by doing what I thought was right, even if it wasn't.

    I've seen a lot of people make mistakes in life - even big ones - in the end it's up to them to make those mistakes. You can't tell another person what to do. But I am sure if I ever become a parent, I'll have a hard time watching my child do something I know is a mistake.

  6. lburmaster profile image82
    lburmasterposted 7 years ago

    To a certain point, yes. Most psychologists are very encouraging of parents to let their children make their own mistakes while the parents watch and wait if the child gets in too tight a spot. Overprotecting parents often cause more problems than they know. You see many overprotecting parents in homeschooling, which gives the homeschool community a bad name when their child finally gets off the leash and goes nuts. However, I will say it's entertaining. The parents turn to each other and say "what did we do wrong" when everyone else already knows.

  7. Penny G profile image60
    Penny Gposted 7 years ago

    It depends . If it is a matter of life and death you should step in. If in ten years is won't matter as my Grandmother said then maybe. Parents were put here to take care of and guild our children. Gotta be sure when we apply the "Experience is the best teacher" we believe it and don't use it as an easy way out. Not implying you are or do,  I mean people in general.


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