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How old were you..?

  1. NewYorker profile image63
    NewYorkerposted 7 years ago

    ... When you started doing all that "grown up stuff"?

    Like, I was 14 when I lost my virginity.
    I was 15 when I started smoking and drinking
    I was 16 when I got my drivers license..

    All that stuff.

    1. tobey100 profile image61
      tobey100posted 7 years agoin reply to this

      18  Just got married, my wife was killed by a drunk driver.  I instantly became a grownup.

      1. profile image0
        Justine76posted 7 years agoin reply to this

        sad
        that's not "grown up stuff"...that's just awful.

      2. Daniel Carter profile image79
        Daniel Carterposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        Wow. Sorry to hear that, friend. Seems, though, that you have a lively household now. Hope life is good now.

        9 yrs wrote my first piece of music
        14 yrs got driver's license (in Idaho you can get it that young. Glad I don't live there any more!)
        21 yrs published first piece of music
        19 went to England
        24 got married
        28 daughter born
        30 son born
        50 started completely over for the 2nd time
        54 in a good place in my life

      3. AnythingArtzy profile image82
        AnythingArtzyposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        what a horrible step into adulthood. I'm so sorry you had to deal with that so young tobey.

      4. profile image0
        B.C. BOUTIQUEposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        Very sorry Tobey..
        I do not even know what to say ..I just hope things have gotten better and you have been able to continue or start healing slowly..I had a man I was close to shot 5 ft away from me while his band was doing a performance. I do not share it often. I have shared the story with Misty Wild and Stevennixx, but it is something I really do not mention much, luckily I have healed, but I still carry the scars..

        You have my full condolences, my friend.

      5. shazwellyn profile image44
        shazwellynposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        tobey.. tragic circumstance not only breaks the heart and the soul but, does indeed, make people grow up xxxxx Poor baby!!!

        1. tobey100 profile image61
          tobey100posted 7 years agoin reply to this

          Does change a persons entire outlook on life.  Looking back I believe her death was one of the main reasons I always chose dangerous hobbies like motorcycle and boat racing.  I had sort of a 'kiss my ass' outlook on life. (pardon the expression).  I think it made me very protective where my sons were concerned.  I've had to always fight being over protective.  The life we've lived makes us who we become I guess.

    2. profile image0
      Justine76posted 7 years agoin reply to this

      I was 18 when all of "that stuff" started.
      I was more of a "grown up" whe I was 8, my fatehr became disabled, we went bankrupt and moved out of our home in the country to a disgusting apartment in the city, my mother had surgery on her shoulder and she was in a drug induced near coma state for months, and my  youngest sister was 6 months old. I did everything, cooking, cleaning, laundry, taking care of my baby sister...etc...

      1. tobey100 profile image61
        tobey100posted 7 years agoin reply to this

        Now its my turn.  That's awful.  Between the two of us I believe we just defined 'life'.  You must have done a good job.

    3. prettydarkhorse profile image63
      prettydarkhorseposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      I was 21 when I had it all, married, fcuk-- hehe, lost virginity--never tried smoking and drinking, crack etc..
      divorced once, had children

      my life is boring except of course I traveled a lot before

      happily single and I can say i had it all---but everyday is a new day

    4. profile image0
      B.C. BOUTIQUEposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      around 13, but I did not come from anything but a very untraditional family. My grandmother adopted all her grandchildren, Grandpa passed, and she did the best she did.

      I would not be the person I am today if it were not for the situations we endured as a makeshift family when I was a child.

      Thank you Grandma, I will always hold you close and dear to my heart, but I think you know that . ( B.1927 - D.2000 )

      1. profile image0
        B.C. BOUTIQUEposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        sorry, I can not give many personal details of my childhood or make an official time line, I will just say things were different than how I raise my child and how a "average" family" operates

    5. profile image0
      cosetteposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      i started working when i was 14 because my dad died. my older sisters watched me like a hawk so i remained a virgin until i was almost 20 (first kiss and everything). i hated that. any man that tried to talk to me they ran off. i didn't even drive a car until i was 20. i tried a cigarette once when i was 21 and instantly hated it. i had my first drink at 21 also, but didn't take to that either, although i do drink at parties and enjoy relaxing with a nice glass of sparkling wine now and then. oh, and i tried pot once or twice and couldn't get past the taste. blechh..

  2. Urbane Chaos profile image92
    Urbane Chaosposted 7 years ago

    I'm still trying to figure out what all that "grown up stuff" is.. hmm

  3. Ivorwen profile image73
    Ivorwenposted 7 years ago

    I was...
    8 when I began caring for the numerous pets and burring all the dead ones.
    9 when I began driving.
    12 when I began babysitting and working with my dad, doing drywall.
    13 when I began checking the cattle regularly, and helping with calving.
    14 when I began tutoring classmates in algebra, first date.
    16, drivers licence, traveling w/o parents, nannying, first boyfriend.
    17 college.
    20 married.
    21 first child, first alcohol...

  4. Chloe Comfort profile image57
    Chloe Comfortposted 7 years ago

    Here I go...

    15 when I lost my virginity.
    14 when I started smoking.
    17 when I got my first job.
    18 when I got my drivers license.
    22 when I got married the first time
    25 when I divorced the idiot
    28 when I remarried
    30 when I had my first child
    33 when I had my second child

    1. double_frick profile image61
      double_frickposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      14 when i started kissing boys, drinking alcohol, smoking cigarettes and cannabis and basically being a bad girl.
      16 moved to arizona and became a "jesus freak" (i really called myself that LOL)
      17 i reverted back to my bad girl aspirations and lost my virginity. and had my first job. baskin robbins, yum! smile
      18 first year i couch surfed. almost joined the navy (sworn in and the whole deal) got my first drivers license! and my first tattoo!
      19 i fell in love the very first time. he introduced me to drug addiction.
      20 i quit drugs. went out of the country. and got pregnant. (not by that same guy, actually by the one who helped me quit)
      21 had a baby. grew up, officially and dramatically.
      24 had another baby. and grew up in new ways.
      25 i feel a little less awkward referring to myself as a woman and until this year i never felt grown up or adult like.

      wow. thats sort of my life story in a nutshell.

  5. wychic profile image92
    wychicposted 7 years ago

    10 when I started my own business
    15 supporting myself
    16 got a driver's license
    17 lost my virginity (same year as my first kiss...go figure)
    19 first kid
    21 drunk the first time
    22 first marriage (we'd been together five years)
    23 first divorce (took him six weeks after marriage to head for greener pastures, almost a year to get the divorce)
    23 second marriage

    and that brings us up to the present...and now I'm feeling very young in here...that just all looks really bad without the back story tongue.

    1. motricio profile image73
      motricioposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Wow, a sort time to have so many experiences like those.

  6. profile image0
    Pani Midnyte Odinposted 7 years ago

    11: Started Smoking
    14: Lost Virginity
    14: Started Drinking & Doing Drugs
    17: Moved Out On My Own
    19: Quit Drinking & Doing Drugs

  7. elayne001 profile image57
    elayne001posted 7 years ago

    13 Kiss boys
    14 Tasted vodka
    15 Drivers permit
    16 Hippy style
    17 Graduated High School
    18 Married
    19 Worked long and hard
    20 Jilted - Divorced
    21 Married again
    22 1st baby - really had to grow up
    22 Moved to another country - eyes opened
    23 2nd baby
    27 3rd baby
    29 4th baby
    30 Hysterectomy
    Still didn't really grow up until I was 40 : )

    1. profile image44
      Now what!posted 7 years agoin reply to this

      So there is time for me!

  8. tobey100 profile image61
    tobey100posted 7 years ago

    Well thank you.  Very confusing.  that's not how life's supposed to be.

    1. wychic profile image92
      wychicposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Unfortunately, life rarely is how it's supposed to be...I've never lost anyone as close to me as a spouse, but still someone close...my nephew died almost two years ago now, his father is like a twin to me, and it's still a daily struggle for all of us, especially him. He got sent to Iraq, and three weeks before he was to come home his 3 1/2-year-old son died in the care of his ex-wife's boyfriend under "officially undetermined" circumstances. I have ties to the medical community and know what happened, and anyone who hears the basic details can infer correctly.

      1. tobey100 profile image61
        tobey100posted 7 years agoin reply to this

        For a long time I had the feeling, strange as it may sound, that I wanted to get off the train I was on and walk a while.  Doesn't make much sense but I can't say it any other way.

        1. prettydarkhorse profile image63
          prettydarkhorseposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          maybe freedom and the feel of it, and the challenge it brings like walking to a new way, new direction maybe?

        2. wychic profile image92
          wychicposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          No, it does make sense...it is often the feeling that leads people into drugs or alcohol to take a break, or to suicide because there is no way to go away and then come back.

          1. tobey100 profile image61
            tobey100posted 7 years agoin reply to this

            Too true.  Can't say either didn't cross my mind.  Teenagers aren't equipped to handle loss on that level.  But just look at me now.  I only have shock therapy twice a month now!

            1. wychic profile image92
              wychicposted 7 years agoin reply to this

              Personally, I don't think ANYONE is equipped to handle loss on that level...maybe teenagers are a little less equipped, because it definitely blows the mind a lot more than, say, an 80-year-old spouse, because the latter has already exceeded the average human life span. That said, no matter how much we know something is going to happen or know that it has happened, our minds still refuse to accept it. I know that, barring accident or injury, my husband will die long before I do...and I cringe to think what might happen to him if I were to go first, because that's something neither of us is expecting.

              1. tobey100 profile image61
                tobey100posted 7 years agoin reply to this

                I guess the Lord knows best.  We lost a son, Joshua, a fews years back and I really believe my earlier pain helped me with the loss of a son.  Still goes against nature though.

      2. NewYorker profile image63
        NewYorkerposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        Life is NEVER what you want it to be.

  9. theirishobserver. profile image61
    theirishobserver.posted 7 years ago

    I was 12 years old when my fourteen year old cousins taught me how to be a real man.......I just never looked back..... smile

  10. Jane@CM profile image60
    Jane@CMposted 7 years ago

    Tobey, you did have to grow up fast!

    I don't remember all the dates.

    18. Mom died
    19. Dad died

    26. married
    29. 1st baby
    33. 2nd baby

  11. TheGlassSpider profile image74
    TheGlassSpiderposted 7 years ago

    Hmmm...

    I was 8 years old when I got my first job with mentally ill people in our family business...

    I was 10 when I started raising my brother as my own since my parents were kinda out of it at the time...

    I was 14 when I got hit by a car and realized I was not immortal; shortly thereafter, I had  my first (and only) nervous breakdown. 14 when I was taken from my parents and separated from my brother...that might have really been the BIG growing up year.

    I was 15 when I had my first therapist's appointment.

    I was 18 when I became the first in my family to go to college.

    I was 21 when I lost my virginity. 21 when I lost my fiance to a motorcycle crash. Oh yeah...got my learner's permit this year as well.

    I was 22 when I became the first in my family to graduate from college (with honors). 22 when my aunt (who saved me from my parents), died. 22 when I became homeless and when my mother and I became a part of each other's lives again. Got my driver's license this year (I lived, prior to this time, in a place where mass transit was better than having a car).

    I was 23 when I got married the first (and only...ever) time; I was still 23 when he decided to walk out about because I wouldn't allow him to use drugs in our home.

    I was 26 when I decided that I was slowly killing myself and had to lose weight; I have lost (and kept off) over 200 pounds, with only minor fluctuations.

    I was 27 when I became the first in my family to go to grad school (by the grace of God and the support of the gov't). Started living the freelance writer dream that year. Later that year, Mom died.

    I was 28 when I stopped smoking (almost three months ago).

    I am 29 now...Am I grown up?

    tongue Nahhh! It's a process! Despite all the ups and downs, I'd like to think that I'm still young at heart, in awe of the world, and generally positive about the goodness of life and humanity.

    Nice thread. It's interesting to see the time lines of other hubbers.

  12. Cagsil profile image60
    Cagsilposted 7 years ago

    To give a timeline? Can be difficult, but I'll give it a try. lol

    At age 5-7 abusive(unauthorized touching/fondling)
    At age 7-11 abusive(authorized over used physical)
    At age 9 started drinking and smoking cigarettes, first kiss
    At age 13 quit smoking entered high school, lost virginity, made first communion based on catholic religion
    At age 17 graduated high school, got license and started smoking again. In same year, had multiple accidents, left with multiple scars(one V shape on forehead and duel scars on right wrist) - father died(while in high school) **just wrote a hub about it. Also made confirmation, based on Catholic religion.
    At age 18, denied entrance to military due to right wrist. First engagement, got first job, first car.
    At age 22, began studying core of religion. Worked odd jobs.
    At age 24, began a second engagement, which fell apart.
    At age 30, began self-realization life's misconceptions.
    At age 35, completed studies of religion scripture and self-realized, there is no "GOD" looking out for society. Thus, creating life-altering changes to my life.
    At age 39, began developing self-employed business to help others.
    At age 41, presently gripped in reality of life and spreading knowledge I've learned and experienced. smile

    That's as much was I can remember. smile

  13. Sa Toya profile image75
    Sa Toyaposted 7 years ago

    Still a virgin

    Childhood- shit happens....

    19: Alcohol
    20 tried a cigarette or 3...couldn't smoke, I just couldn't get the smoke down...not my thing.

    19-22 been drunk about 7 times

    Don't really drink so two drinks usually does it.
    Still not a drinker/smoker

    Still a virgin.

    22 Graduated with Law degree- makes me feel grown up but still awkward thinking of myself as a woman.

    22-now 23- writing a novel I intend to publish and started a blog... feels grow up because I'm doing what I really want to do and am happy with it.

    22- found myself again and actually loves her/me.

    I'm fairly boring to other 20 year olds who shag around and binge drink and club hop...but I AM far from boring big_smile

    1. TheGlassSpider profile image74
      TheGlassSpiderposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Good for you!! I am sure you are growing into a very interesting and mature woman.

      1. Sa Toya profile image75
        Sa Toyaposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        Cheers...I hope so!

  14. myownworld profile image80
    myownworldposted 7 years ago

    ...this thread is a fascinating read!! big_smile

    1. Cagsil profile image60
      Cagsilposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Interesting, intriguing, unique, fantastic, awesome and fascinating are all different words you could have chosen.

      lol lol lol lol

      1. myownworld profile image80
        myownworldposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        lol ((esp. loved your 'timeline'! )))

        1. Cagsil profile image60
          Cagsilposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          Why? smile

          1. myownworld profile image80
            myownworldposted 7 years agoin reply to this

            well....it was direct and honest...and because I find you intriguing...! (see, I did use one of the words u suggested! wink

            1. Cagsil profile image60
              Cagsilposted 7 years agoin reply to this

              Okay, just checking. big_smile tongue

              1. myownworld profile image80
                myownworldposted 7 years agoin reply to this

                wink

    2. TheGlassSpider profile image74
      TheGlassSpiderposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      I agree. Will you be sharing your "time line" with us? Inquiring minds want to know, you know. wink smile

      1. myownworld profile image80
        myownworldposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        I tie the facts of my 'real' life in a neat little knot when I come here....and I like them to stay like that. It's others who fascinate me more....! wink

        1. TheGlassSpider profile image74
          TheGlassSpiderposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          I can understand that. I had similar intentions when I first came here. But it's difficult to maintain. Glad you're enjoying the reading though.

          1. myownworld profile image80
            myownworldposted 7 years agoin reply to this

            join us behind the curtain to watch....! wink

    3. tantrum profile image61
      tantrumposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      yeah !!
      that's why I'm not posting  !
      lol

      1. motricio profile image73
        motricioposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        uf Tantrum is afraid? neutral

        1. tantrum profile image61
          tantrumposted 7 years agoin reply to this

          No !
          I like to keep the mystery ! big_smile

          1. myownworld profile image80
            myownworldposted 7 years agoin reply to this

            Exactly! big_smile

            1. tantrum profile image61
              tantrumposted 7 years agoin reply to this

              Very interesting to see what others have to say.
              lol

  15. shazwellyn profile image44
    shazwellynposted 7 years ago

    I left home at 16, had to survive and earn money with 3 jobs, a bedsit with a hole in the floor, looking down to the bedsit below.
    I grew up

    I left a violent relationship within a drug community...

    I grew up even more

    I had a baby who at 18 months became insulin dependent diabetic (brinking death every other day) another son who was undiagnosed aspergers

    Did I grow up?  I broke down... then I grew up!

    at 38 the kids were older... Like a sprung jack in the box, I became who I was at 16, 18. 24... I didnt grow up.. I regressed!

    Im not sure if I am grown up now, but I am self assured x

  16. motricio profile image73
    motricioposted 7 years ago

    So do I wink

  17. myownworld profile image80
    myownworldposted 7 years ago

    yep...let's hope we have more 'confessions' on the way....! wink

    1. tantrum profile image61
      tantrumposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      and who will dare now ? hmm
      lol

      1. myownworld profile image80
        myownworldposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        lol shhh...stop scaring them...let's pretend we're not here...!

  18. tantrum profile image61
    tantrumposted 7 years ago

    big_smile

    By Mow !! See you later !!
    ((closing the door and staying behind it))

    1. myownworld profile image80
      myownworldposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      lol

      *ducking behind a curtain and lying very very still...

  19. tantrum profile image61
    tantrumposted 7 years ago

    Whispering in you ear

    ((this thread is dead ))

    big_smile

  20. myownworld profile image80
    myownworldposted 7 years ago

    *controlling her laughter

    (((( not yet .....just watch and wait ))))

  21. motricio profile image73
    motricioposted 7 years ago

    mmm nah I'll pass
    Too much confessions on the dance floor.
    cool

  22. Christene profile image73
    Christeneposted 7 years ago

    Wow, I feel guilty that I had such a non-dramatic childhood. Some of you have been through so much!

    drivers license and first job @ 16
    graduated high school and started college @ 17
    first boyfriend @ 18
    never smoked
    never been drunk
    never done any drugs
    graduated college, lived alone, and had first professional job @ 22
    moved in with (5th) boyfriend @ 23
    married & had first & only child @ 24

    I'm 33 now.

    1. TheGlassSpider profile image74
      TheGlassSpiderposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Hey, that's nice...Don't feel guilty. I'm glad to hear SOMEBODY feels like they had a pretty good/stable childhood. Yay!

  23. KCC Big Country profile image88
    KCC Big Countryposted 7 years ago

    15-lost virginity to my boyfriend of over a year who would end up being the only boyfriend I ever had and become my husband of 23 yrs
    18-married
    23-had my first alcoholic beverage
    27-had my son
    29-had my daughter
    40-filed for divorce after 23 yrs, 3 wks later our son died as a result of go-cart accident (life-changing year to say the least)
    43-traveled alone to England to meet a man I had been talking to online
    44-married the Englishman I met online and he moved to the states

  24. profile image50
    Stephanie_Hposted 7 years ago

    15...lost virginity
    16...started smoking (still am, unfortunately)
    22...got pregnant and miscarried
    23...started smoking MJ (done w/ that crap)
    27...started drinking
    29...I FINALLY

  25. AEvans profile image80
    AEvansposted 7 years ago

    7.... First Spelling Bee
    8.... Took Second at Spelling Bee heck and I forget how to spell now, lololo big_smile

    9.... When I wrote my first short story
    10.... When I wrote my first (real poem) that made sense I still have both of those which mom saved.
    15... when I was able to stay out until 10:00pm
    16.... Driver's License
    17....First date was at 17
    18.... When I had graduated from high school
    21.... When I graduated from The University I already had two years of college when I was in High School.
    21.... Lost Virginity

    and the rest is history. smile

  26. NewYorker profile image63
    NewYorkerposted 7 years ago

    I'll put down my whole journey.

    5.. Stopped picking my nose.
    7.. Had my first crush (on my math teacher, mrs. vernasques)
    10.. Learned about schizophrenia
    14.. lost my virginity
    15.. smoking, drinking
    16.. drivers license, first car.
    16.. got my first real job (starbucks)
    17.. finished high school, started college
    21.. finished college, started med school, moved to new york
    25.. got my m.d., picked my specialty
    26.. got accepted by a hospital, started my psychiatry career
    27.. Here I am today!

    Nothing interesting happened to me, lol.

  27. torimari profile image71
    torimariposted 7 years ago

    This is an interesting thread. Other than the normal, grown-up stuff, it's neat to see what other events people felt affected their maturity. smile

    8-14: Tortured as being the chubby girl and had 0 confidence; became a young recluse...
    15: Discovered I actually was smart and was socially accepted by many.
    17: Mother died.
    18: First real and serious boyfriend who lived in Europe. Started college.
    19: Visited Europe (twice), first time out of the country. Lost virginity.
    20: Europe for a third time...mentally drained by relationship and cutting self.
    21: After 2.5, dumped problematic bf, and in doing so, gained a bit of confidence. Also, discovered a belief-system appropriate fully for me: atheism.
    22: Finished college with my BA in English, and had an internship with two newspapers.
    23: Currently lost in life, but considerably content regardless. smile Just gotta get my foot in the door.

    1. NewYorker profile image63
      NewYorkerposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      I know what it's like being a teen with no self esteem..

      1. Daniel Carter profile image79
        Daniel Carterposted 7 years agoin reply to this

        Yeah, me too.
        The first 20 years of my life I lived in a torture chamber.  Took 47 years to make peace with it and forgive the abuse. But if you can unchain your hatred by forgiving, a whole new world starts to happen. I held my abuser's hand as they took their last breath, and we learned to love each other. It was actually rather miraculous. I didn't think I could ever do that.

        No one really escapes the crap in this life and nobody gets out alive. It may be different for all of us, but it's still usually just as devastating in whatever way it comes.

        My life is good now. There are lots of setbacks and problems, but I think I know how to keep moving forward and for the most part, no longer be a victim. I'm finally good with being me and I like me. It's taken a long time.

    2. wychic profile image92
      wychicposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      I was the chubby one in school too...until Sophomore year...I lost 80 pounds over the summer and all of a sudden people realized, "Hey, she's 5'6", 128 pounds and kept the DD's!" (yeah, the kid grew them a couple more sizes since then). It really served me well that I got to see how those people acted before that, made it easier to see who to just cut out of my life. My "pack o' misfits" are still my friends today, and all of the people that showed up drooling out of the woodwork when I lost weight got booted as quickly as they turned up.

 
working