From crib to bed - is there a norm?

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   L a d y f a c eposted 13 years ago

   I have an 18 month old, who is no where near ready for a toddler bed. He'd be up all night playing.. I'd find him in the morning, passed out haphazardly on the floor, stuffed kitten in one hand, lego block in the other.
   
   When do kids usually make the great switch to beds?

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2. 64

   Mishaposted 13 years ago

   Did you actually try?
   
   And then, what exactly do you mean by crib and toddler bed? As far as I remember toddler beds have high barriers around.

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   L a d y f a c eposted 13 years ago

   Cribs have 4 walls, toddler beds are miniature beds. It's a training bed essentially, from which the child can exit at any time.
   
   I have tried, yes. We had to put his crib back up, because all he did was mess his room up and then cry because he could get to the door, but not out.
   
   I was looking for an opinion on a general age or mentality that kids are or possess when they're able to successfully use a bed instead of a crib. It was sort of a 'when did your child go from crib to bed' question.

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      Mishaposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      OK, so you are not talking about bassinet here. I think mine stayed in crib up to 2.5-3 years. Until they just outgrew it.

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         L a d y f a c eposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         Oh! Sorry no, not a bassinet. We never actually had one for him. He slept in his crib from day 1. The mattress has two levels, one for newborns, and a lower one for when they get a little bigger. I got lots and lots of "*gasp.. you didn't let him sleep in your bedroom, or your bed with you??"
         .. I did not. He seems to be doing just fine without that.. Back to bassinets, I think they're classically adorable though. Would loved to have had one

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            wychicposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            Nothing wrong with that, in my humble opinion...my son never had a bassinet either. My then-husband had sleep apnea and weighed 400 pounds, and we shared a double bed (NO room left!), so it would have been very dangerous to allow any co-sleeping with baby. He slept in the next room over from day one, and I only used the baby monitor for a week or so until I stopped being so obsessed about needing to hear him breathe all the time. We have a bassinet for my daughter, and I do have to admit that it is a lot nicer getting her in and out, but I'd just as soon have had the space to get something she'll use for a couple of years instead of just a few months.

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   Giselle Maineposted 13 years ago

   I think there is such a variation and so much depends on the child.  18 months is considered on the young side these days.  I know this because I switched our child at 18 months old from a crib to a regular bed not a toddler bed (although we attached a bed rail).  A lot of people seemed horrified that I would switch him so young (it involved him switching rooms too).   I wasn't trying to 'be mean' - I knew my kid and I thought he was ready to handle it (well, also kid #2 was due really soon which was the main reason behind the timing!). I was prepared to be flexible about it though - if it didn't seem to be working out after a week, we'd let him go back to the crib & get another for the new baby.  But sure enough he handled the transition fine at night (although it did take the full week before he'd successfully take daytime naps in there on the bed). 
   
   The reason I thought he was ready was a) he has always been a pretty good sleeper - in that he 'likes' to sleep and b) although he COULD get in and out of the big bed on his own, it wasn't easy so he had figured out pretty quick that staying in the bed was to his advantage.
   
   Anyhow, I know this is a really long post, but what I'm saying is that a) every child is different b) whatever you do, it will seem 'early' to some people and 'late' to others.  (most of my friend's kids switched around 2 or 2 and a half yrs old).  c) you know your child better than other people do, go with what seems to work for him.
   
   Hope this helps! Feel free to ask if there's anything that's not clear.

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      L a d y f a c eposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      No no! Everything is clear. This is a wonderful response, thank you You're absolutely correct. It doesn't seem to matter what I do, concerning any topic you choose, there are critics. According to some people you can't do anything 'right'. Lol
      
      Sounds like your oldest was a dream in this respect! So glad it worked out for you. I think I'll take your advice and try again when he's 2 - 2.5, and try to clue in to little signs.
      
      Thanks!

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   Stina Caxeposted 13 years ago

   I had read that between the ages of two and three was best.  My daughter is not quite there yet.  I think once I'm afraid of her crawling out of her crib and hurting herself I will want her in a bed.  Also I'd like to wait until I know she can safely get in and out of the bed by herself.  I know that is not an issue for most people but my daughter is very small for her age due to being born early.

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      L a d y f a c eposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I can totally understand why you would want to wait since your daughter is, as you say, small for her age. I was told that when kids' chests reach the top of the rail they should be switching... but I think he'll be older than 2.5 - 3 by then!

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   wychicposted 13 years ago

   My son went to a toddler bed at about 18 months, but basically the deciding factor was when he got to the point that he could easily climb over the rails of his crib anyway. While he was very good at swinging over the rails, he did fall a couple of times, so the toddler bed just seemed safer. We did have to work with him a lot on, "Now it's bed time, you have to lay down and go to sleep." That took a couple of months before we didn't have any trouble with him trying to get up, but we also had a very small house and I slept lightly so I was able to get up and put him back in bed every time he got out. He got a twin-sized bed when he was two years old, which was a lot higher off the ground, but I moved then and he ended up with my first "real bed" that my mom still had in storage. No problems with that, just again have to tell him to get back into bed if he gets up after lights-out unless he has to go to the bathroom (he's 5 now, wasn't potty trained by time he got the big bed) or has to get a drink of water.
   
   My daughter isn't even two months old yet, still in the bassinet, so it remains to be seen with her .

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      L a d y f a c eposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Wow thanks for the great intel, Wychic I think his 'toddler bed' will actually end up being a twin bed. Like you, my old one is still available, and it's in not-too-bad condition and closer to the floor than most. Maybe if he has lots of room to roll around in he'll be more likely to stay in it? ? I can hope right??
      
      Congrats on the birth of your daughter

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   Lisa HWposted 13 years ago

   My three kids were just three.  It was just kind of the age that seemed right to me.  Their third birthday was the signal for me.  I didn't want a three-year-old in a crib.  My sons had toddler beds. My daughter went straight into a regular bed, because I got her a whole, new, bedroom set.
   
   I don't know..   They just seemed to be comfortable with their cribs when they were two.  It was like they were still little enough to sleep in a crib, and yet old enough to think of it as their own "special place".  Two-year-olds are known for not liking changes in routine, so I suppose that factored in for me too.
   
   Two-year-olds can get of their cribs, so the rails aren't usually a major issue for a lot of people, I don't think.  The little rails on the toddler bed, and the low height make less concern that they'll fall out.  I put plastic guard-rails on my daughter's bed.
   
   Also, to me, they can just understand a lot of things better; but three-year-olds are usually pretty cooperative.   They tend to be more likely to see new things as "exciting and new", rather than as an "unwanted change" (generally, anyway).
   
   As I said, three just seemed like they were more than ready to me.  There weren't any issues.  They just happily went along with the switch.  (I did talk about it some before I actually made the switch, so it wasn't "some big shock".    )
   
   Personally, I'd never switch a toddler younger than two. There's just too many things they don't have a clue about in one way or another.
   
   One worry with a crib, though, can be a child who climbs over the rails.  One of my sons was ten months or so when I heard him calling, "Hidin'".  I went in to discover him straddling the crib rail.  Apparently, he'd figured out what "high" means (and maybe heard the word, "hiding").  Either way, it was something he'd do on a regular basis for awhile.  He was a super-tiny little guy because he was a premie, so I was pretty concerned that it was a particularly big drop for such a tiny guy.    Then, though, he got a little older and stopped doing that (at least until he got old enough to climb in and out on his own later).      (At least he'd always warn me by calling, "hidin'".    That was a help.  )

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      L a d y f a c eposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      That's some really great advice, Lisa, thanks
      
      So, the story about your son "hidin' made me go
      Heart stopping! So very nice of him to give you the warning signal I love kids, they're so innocent and sweet.
      
      Good to know about two year-olds. I don't know much about what to expect, I was raised an only child and I didn't see any little people growing up. I do, however, like any other living, breathing ball of cells on this planet, know about THE TERRIBLE TWOS. Every time my son has a bad string of days where he throws tantrums more than usual my inner voice goes "oh god. Oh god this is it, isn't it. Get the riot gear" All the stories you hear about THE TERRIBLE TWOS make you wish you could skip this second year you haven't even entered yet
      
      My son is in the 'still too many things he doesn't have a clue about one way or the other' stage. For a lot of things, he quite simply doesn't seem interested yet.
      
      Thanks for the advice and words of experience

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         Lisa HWposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         Ladyface, I wasn't thinking of it so much as "advice", as just "one person's take" on the matter.    I'm uncomfortable with the word, "advice".   
         
         The Terrible Two's aren't always anywhere near as bad as a lot of people say.  They're all different, but I found mine were most exhausting at fifteen months, when they're REALLY too little to understand much but when they're about at the highest physically-active/no-thinking stage.  For me, eighteen months was a little easier than that non-stop fifteen-month thing; but eighteen months was still too young for them to really play and understand a lot of stuff.  I didn't really get any Terrible Two's (although I did figure out not to let a two-year-old get too tired, and to "keep them abreast" of any plans  ).  THEN, though, my daughter was three when she suddenly developed a thing where she'd scream when we went to leave the park she was having so much fun playing in.  (And I'd thought I was out of the woods as far as that kind of thing went.)  I eventually figured out that even at three she needed "warning" about any changes in what we were doing.
         
         It turns out (apparently) that even if you think you have a rough idea of what to expect, there's a really good chance a little kid will surprise you and do something that nobody would have expected.    What a sweet, sweet, age your little guy is, though.  No doubt about, though - it can be an exhausting age for moms.   

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      wychicposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Definitely a terrifying experience! Ten months is about the age that my son, who was big for his age, figured out how to step on the crib bumper and launched himself over the side. Luckily he wasn't hurt, just scared himself really bad, and the bumper went away and never came back.

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   L a d y f a c eposted 13 years ago

   Lisa, I appreciate the take from experience You are indeed correct, it's hard at the age where they can't express what they need, you don't know what they need, but they need something. The only time my son displays anything other than sweet, little boyishness, is when he's overtired, hungry, or if I've taken away something and he doesn't understand why. Such as large hard plastic big blue kids bowling balls that get thrown across the living room and at daddies' heads.
   
   It's good to know about things like advanced warnings of changes to come. I'll be happy when he can understand those things. He finally understands that when we stop doing something, like playing outside, we haven't actually stopped it forever

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   Giselle Maineposted 13 years ago

   Hi, thanks for responding to my post. Like LisaHW said though, I also wasn't intending to give 'advice', I was just saying to go with what your gut tells you about your child regardless of what the expectations are by 'societal standards'. (I learned this from having to ignore all the negative comments I got from transitioning my child early!) So whether you plan to continue with the transition or wait until he's older for it, it doesn't matter as long as you have some kind of basis for the decision based on your child's needs/personality/development. Crib-to-bed is such a child-specific thing.
   
   Best wishes for whatever you do, I'd love to hear what you finally decide! (By the way if you do decide to put it off until a later date, the only real 'advice' I would have is to consider avoiding starting the process in the middle of summer. Doing it in late autumn, winter or early spring when the nights are long might be less distracting for the child). Again though it should all come down to your child rather than the season, that was only if all things are otherwise equal.

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      L a d y f a c eposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      That is great 'advice'! Waiting until the autumn and winter months for that very reason only seems logical now that you've mentioned it. Thanks
      
      I think 'advice' was the wrong word to use in this thread. lol. I like to hear other peoples' experiences and opinions so that I can get a feel for what can come, and what one might expect, and also, what worked and what didn't work for other people. But rest assured, I wouldn't hold anyone to anything they say. I own all my own decisions Most of my friends don't have kids so this is the closest I come to chatting with friends about kids . Is that sad? Even my mom doesn't have much to say about kids!

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         Lisa HWposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         Ladyface, it's probably like that for far more mothers than you realize.  Someone in any group of friends is always going to one of the first to have a baby, and lots of mothers want so much not to seem to try to be "butting in" they'll keep their thoughts to themselves.   (So I don't think it's "sad" at all.     )
         
         On something like this forum, people aren't worried about whether someone will think they're trying to butt in.  Everyone just throws out his take on the matter, and all the different takes are just kind of there.  My thing with the word, "advice", isn't even so much that I'd be worried someone would pay attention to what I say  . .  It's more that I'm not, by nature, someone presuming to offer other people advice.    I think it's good that people get to have a discussion about whatever issue there is.  Having a baby, or a few of them, can be a time when young mothers feel pretty isolated from "plain, old, conversations" with other adults (about one thing or another), or else don't have anyone around who's interested in talking about kids.
         
         There was no Internet when my kids were babies, but I did the same kind of thing you describe with books and magazines.  I'd read everything I could find, see what was out there, and feel like a little bit better informed a decision as a result.  My mother used to make comments about "these young mothers read a book and then do what they tell them."  It used to irk me, because the last kind of mother I was was one who'd do whatever "someone who writes a book" said.    I was just kind of getting a reading on what issues were "out there" and using that as a way to see any new "issues" there may be that I ought to be thinking about  (in order to form my own ideas).
         
         Anyway, to me, talking, reading, sharing ideas, whatever...    That's what most mothers do (at least the thinking ones).  Besides (at least for me), on a site like this, talking about babies and cribs and stuff like that is far more pleasant than bickering over politics or religion    .

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    MelissaBarrettposted 13 years ago

    For me, it was always when they were old enough to start showing interest in climbing out of it.  Once they were able to get their legs up on the rail (or try to) out came the toddler bed.  The way I figured it was I'd rather have them fall from the 18 inch toddler bed than the 3 and a half foot tall crib rail.

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       L a d y f a c eposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       An excellent point you make.

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    L a d y f a c eposted 13 years ago

    I'm with you 100% there. My area of knowledge expansion is primarily my son, then my relationship with my husband, then politics, and then....whatever looks interesting! I'm not into debating over Religion ever, because so many people are so set in their ways, you're essentially just going out looking to argue, not discuss.
    
    Of course the same could be said for politics...and kids... lol
    
    I read a lot of things online, to which my mother says 'remember, you can believe everything you see'. To which I respond the same way I have been for the last 30 years, 'yea mom, I know..' There is no disputing that it's always better to be well informed when you make a decision, than less or misinformed. We each take what we will from it all and form our own opinions, but if no one ever shared any information or experiences or tactics, we'd all be making the same mistakes and having the same troubles over and over...when help was just around the 'corner' so to say.
    
    I'm lucky in the sense that all of my friends except one don't ever say anything about my or my husband's parenting skills or methods. The other one has grown into a completely different person than I, and therefore our parenting techniques are like night and day. But, the world needs diversity! Not criticism.
    
    I like HubPages a lot for the people on here who are always happy to talk about whatever, and share their thoughts. It's like having a magazine that always writes about things you want to read about

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