Being Popular vs Being Unpopular in High School

1. 84

   gmwilliamsposted 12 years ago

   Many of our precious young people are going through dangerous lengths to be accepted and well-liked by as many people as possible.   It seems that in high school, being popular and well-liked is the dream of many teenagers.    They see the great rewards in being popular such as security as there is strength in numbers.   They also view popularity is being considered important and  included in receiving the lastest high school and social news.    For many teenagers, the worst thing is to be considered and/ or to be the dreaded word-unpopular.   Unpopular teenagers are often viewed as outsiders and outcasts in high school.   However, there is some positives regarding teenagers who do not follow the crowd and pursue their individual paths.   Were you popular or unpopular in high school?  How did this effect you later on in life?   If you have children, are they popular or unpopular?   If they are unpopular, do you feel comfortable or uncomfortable with it?  Furthermore, do you try to make your unpopular teenager conform in order to become more popular or do you applaud and encourage his/her unique nonconformity and individuality?

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2. 62

   ikechiawazieposted 12 years ago

   I was unpopular in high school but it did not affect me a bit, thanks to my mother. She always told me never to be like everyone else but be myself. Later in life, these words helped me even when I was in the university and today I am happy with my life.

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      gmwilliamsposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      To ikechiawazie:  God bless your mother.   It is the rare parents who supports and applauds their children's individuality.   Many parents feel that their unpopular teenager is abnormal or worse thus forcing them to conform with the crowd.    These parents often view their unpopular children as oddballs and social misfits, causing further distress to their children. 
      
      This is so sad.   It is not important to be so-called popular.   Many of our most successful and highly creative people were unpopular in high school.   High school popularity is so overrated and such a waste of time.   We must encourage our young people to be strong individualists who are quite comfortable in their own skins.

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3. 62

   ikechiawazieposted 12 years ago

   I agree

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4. 91

   Pcunixposted 12 years ago

   I was not popular but not unpopular either. 
   
   I never thought about it at all.  The question would have surprised me. I probably would have answered that I neither knew nor cared,

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5. 60

   LookingForWaldenposted 12 years ago

   Selling weed can make someone very popular in high school.

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   1. 84

      gmwilliamsposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      Now you have gone ENTIRELY too far.  Let us be civil regarding this issue, please!  Thank you kindly!

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         LookingForWaldenposted 12 years agoin reply to this

         Please.
         Obvious joke.
         However, also true.

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6. 0

   Arlene V. Pomaposted 12 years ago

   What I didn't like about high school was the focus on popular kids being cheerleaders, beauty queens, and athletes.  So if you had brains and were an honor student, headed to college or were already organizing the yearbook or newspaper, you were usually ignored.  I've been a writer from childhood, so you might say writing saved me.  Since I did not stand out as a pretty girl who could wield the pom-poms or make it as homecoming queen, my biggest gift as an unpopular student came in the form of going after what I want and focusing on my writing.  I learned to love my independence and know it's okay not to follow the crowd.  I don't even attend my high school reunions because most people who go to those want to get into your business or to lie about their accomplishments.  And, they think they have such fabulous lives since high school and will tell you all kinds of lies.  Being an unpopular student in high school showed me to rely on myself.  I didn't have anything to prove to the others, and I certainly don't feel that way, now.  You might say I am happy to do my thang.  In the animal world, I'd be the Alpha mare.  In life, I do get involved and play my part.

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   1. 84

      gmwilliamsposted 12 years agoin reply to this

      I also was unpopular in high school.  This made me into the unconventional, iconoclastic individualist that I am today.   When I was in freshman and sophomore years, I bemoaned my status.  However, when I become a junior and senior, I could not have cared less.   The older I get, the more I was thankful that I was not popular.   I was ME and that is the only thing that is important.   Being an unique individual, not a carbon copy of the crowd conforming to the groupthink mentality and consensus!

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7. 62

   prettydarkhorseposted 12 years ago

   I am a little bit popular because I am top of the class, and by level. In that culture, academic excellence is a top priority in order to be successful in life. Most parents wanted me as a friend of their daughter. I am not happy because I don't want to be popular for that reason. I wanted to join the Dance Club plus Baseball Club, and wanted to become a dancer and play baseball during Intramurals. My parents just forced me to excel academically and they put a lot of expectations on me.
   
   I feel I don't belong anywhere because whenever I am with a group, they feel that I should be the leader being on top of the class. I wanted to be accepted for what I am as an ordinary high school not a student with lots of expectations.

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8. 0

   Arlene V. Pomaposted 12 years ago

   My experience as an unpopular kid in high school taught me well.  I am drawn to interesting people--no cookie cutter types for me, either.  I will always admire those who go after what they want and follow their needs and wants.  I like being around risk takers.  I like to know what makes a person tick.  Have you ever noticed the "popular" people in high school who are lost without high school?  You can't stay in this phase, but some people do.  I don't have time for them now, and I didn't have time for them back then.  In my opinion, they are very sad individuals who had no clue on how to grow up.

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   LookingForWaldenposted 12 years ago

   Alphas are born that way and would be in high school.
   I don't think you can like change into one magically after high school.
   
   People can become more attractive or gregarious after high school for sure.

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10. 89

    TheMagicianposted 12 years ago

    I wasn't unpopular, but I wasn't really popular... I was known by a good 2/3 of the school of 2,500 kids without even trying though, so that was cool. As an 18 year old, I've noticed that nowadays, things are much different than what others describe was popular back in the day -- now the IB honor students who are going to Ivy League colleges, or work for the school paper or yearbook, are just as popular (if not more) than the jocks. The only ones who are really "unpopular" are the kids who are uh... I hate to say it, but just really annoying, and not in the socially awkward way (I'm as socially awkward as they come) but just 100% drives-you-crazy type
    
    
    I remember two specifically nerdy guys from middle school -- one was really overweight and the other was your typical inhaler-ridden glasses-wearing chubby guy. Junior/Senior year, the one has put off all the weight and is a star soccer/football player and loved by all, and the other got fit, left the school and joined a thespian-friendly one to become a star of a lot of local plays, hanging out with some well known people. They were never unpopular because of their looks, just because they felt uncomfortable so they'd avoid everything and everyone. Then when they were comfortable, they came out of their shell and wowed everyone. Glad to call these two guys some of my good friends

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    1. 89

       TheMagicianposted 12 years agoin reply to this

       Also, I hear being a hardcore comic book fan was considered lame back in the days at school? Is this true? Because that certainly isn't the fact now... thankfully!

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          gmwilliamsposted 12 years agoin reply to this

          It is important that teenagers to not succumb to the popularity consensus.  Many teenagers wish to be popular in order to gain mass approval and feel like a celebrity.  While there are some teenagers by virtue of their personality will be popular, others will not so do not agonize about it!  If a teenager is a more introverted personality, he/she should rejoice in that and just be themselves.  If no one likes them, so what?  It is important that they like and respect themselves first and foremost of all!

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    darkeyeringsposted 10 years ago

    This is a very interesting question. most people in high school are unpopular. I guess people skills and how good looking you are can determine this. not how smart you are, or how unique you are.or sweet you are. I've always been the type that apparently doesn't have a bullshit meter. i can not pretend with people. i wear my heart on my sleeve. and am not fake at all. I have gotten better over the years.( in work situations) or (meeting new people) but this is the way i see popular people as fake and dont know who they are. at least in high school guarantee im not alone. you see the way i see it is if you are always accepted. your never forced to find out who you are. what makes you, you. what kind of things  give you an amazing feeling inside like awe i love this so much it makes me burst at the seams! in middile school and elementary school people who aren't popular are way more concerned about becoming popular, then in high school. for me i fell into my own nook. and it didn't concern me anymore i was who i was and glad to know who that was. I love to play music. i love animals. i have great empathy for people. and love to help. love to give gifts, make people smile and laugh.compassionate, i love god and learning new things. I cant wait for what life has in store and being unpopular helped me figure these things out. im almost 23 now and wouldn't change my high school experience for the world. but trust me if your in highschool now it gets better! : )

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