What if your wife says that she needs to love her before she can love you ?

1. 53

   clarkjlposted 13 years ago

   What if your wife says that she needs to love her before she can love you ?
   
   I am haveing some issues with my marrage ! well first of all I am in the military and me and my wife didn't have that long of a courtship period before we got married almost a year and a half ago. we had to move 3000 miles away from her family which is hard on both of us ! she lost here mom a few months after we met and I don't know if she has completely greeved yet ! right now she says she dosen't know if she  loves me like a husband and she is won't sleep in the same bed with me ! she says that she need to love here before she can love me! I don't know what to do !

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2. 60

   DanuckInUSAposted 13 years ago

   She doesn't understand the love is something you give away not something you hoard and lavish upon yourself.

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3. 61

   prettydarkhorseposted 13 years ago

   That is tough, she doesn't know if she loves you now. It must be hard between the two of you, she didn't recover from the death of her mother yet, and she is very far from her family. Talk to her, and explain to her that she is married now. She must be feeling so alone now, specially if you are on duty always. You need to stay with her as often as you can and let her have some friends there if possible. Does she has other activities? Do you have children together? Be strong, support and love her more. I hope things will change soon for the two of you. Good luck.

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4. 59

   ChristineVianelloposted 13 years ago

   I am sorry to hear that you are having problems in you marrige. I know that loosing a mother is one of the hardest things to go through in life. I would just try to be by her side as much as you can. I believe also that you do have to love yourself before you can love someone else.

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5. 69

   puddingicecreamposted 12 years ago

   Some people are like that. Try to be as supportive as you can, and be there for her! Things have been tough, and she just wants to know that you'll be there with her before she "throws herself at you" or "dedicates" herself to her husband. She's just afraid of feeling left alone again, especially since you're on duty.

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