How do you handle a bad neighbor?

1. 60

   Sam Dolloffposted 12 years ago

   How do you handle a bad neighbor?
   
   i have an unreasonable neighbor that has called teh cops and animal controll on my several times.  They will not have a decent conversations with me to just come to the root of the problem.  What would you do?

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2. 60

   Hound Catposted 12 years ago

   Somehow lines of communication need to be built.  Sometimes this is impossible and the authorities need to be utilized.  Having to move to get away from unreasonable neighbors is a poor choice.

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3. 87

   ThePracticalMommyposted 12 years ago

   Why would they call animal control? Do you have a dog that barks non-stop? I agree that you should try to civilly try to speak with them to see what they want from you.
   
   If it is a dog problem, I'd find ways to control the barking. I have a dog who likes to bark, but we trained him so that with one simple command (Leave it!) he refrains from barking. I wouldn't want it to disturb the neighbors, even though they have worse problems than I...

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4. 80

   lydociaposted 12 years ago

   We used to have a bad relationship with our neighbours, and we have no idea what fixed it.
   
   All I know is that the woman next door seemed an old grumpy witch to us at first, and my mother's reaction was to ignore her and say mean things behind her back. I, however, took the time to smile and wave and say hello everytime. At first, she never returned it, but after a while she noticed I meant it seriously and she responded with a wave, after some more time she smiled and after even more time, we stood outside talking about the weather.
   
   All I am saying is, if there are no "decent" reasons (i.e. your tree is blocking their sunshine, your kid is a drummer, etc) for why they may hold a grudge against you, it oftentimes is just prejudice - and prejudice can be broken by a smile and determination.

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5. 59

   delmer47posted 12 years ago

   We had a bad neighbor, an older woman who was afraid of a lot of things....afraid that our tree would fall on her house, etc. We ended up just killing her with kindness. We Cut her yard while she was on vacation, cleaned her gutters, etc. No problems now. I guess in the long run showing someone kindness can open the door to good things.

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6. 60

   seichepreyposted 12 years ago

   I have a couple of neighbors that I despise and they return the favor.  We just tend to ignore one another and that's about it.

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7. 69

   cre8ivOneposted 12 years ago

   Sam
   I feel your pain, my neighbors don't call the police on us but she is a single mother and she not to mention her two children know nothing about boundaries.  The kids run in and out of driveways and yards, several of the other neighbors are worried we will hit her kids with our cars because she sends them outside and doesn't watch them.  She always acts so surprised whenever any of us try to talk to her about the situation.  She deflects every issue with something else.  I just don't really try to talk to her anymore, I live my life, she lives hers, no it's not very neighborly but after several incidents, it's come to this.
   
   I hope you can find a way to talk with your neighbor but honestly, if you can't get on speaking terms with them to atleast find out why they are upset, you might not get the chance to really fix the problem.  Good luck to you, hope things calm down. : )

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8. 40

   Borsiaposted 12 years ago

   The first thing you need to do is look at what the complaints have been.
   You mention they have called both the police and animal control. Do you have a problem that you are not addressing?
   If you live in pretty much any city there are animal codes. If you have a dog is it kept restrained to your property? Does it bark, as someone else mentioned?
   In most cities it is classified as a nuisance if it barks for more than 30 seconds without stopping. Most cities also have strict leash laws that allow a leash of a specific maximum length, usually 6-8'.
   Before you blame your neighbor make sure that they aren't in the right.
   If the police come to your home on a complaint they are not supposed to say who complained, but they are required to tell you specifically what the complaint is.
   If it is a complaint about your dog they are supposed to tell you what the dog is supposedly doing.
   If you can honestly say that nothing is wrong on your end, and the police can't find any problem when they come, all you can do is attempt to talk to your neighbor in a non-confrontational manor. Be the better person. If they insist on continuing the problem file a harassment complaint with the police, if it is extreme look into a restraining order.

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