Is sparing one feelings a good reason to lie to someone or do you tell them the

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   graceinusposted 11 years ago

   Is sparing one feelings a good reason to lie to someone or  do you tell them the truth regardless?
   
   I believe this is a question we have all faced at some point time. It is most likely the most common kind of lie people tell (to spare one's feelings). And for many people this kind of lying is directed towards those we love the most. Is sparing someone's feeling a good reason? Or do you tell people the truth regardless.

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   Rev. Akinsposted 11 years ago

   My only issue with people telling the "truth" is it is typically an opinion. Too many people claim they "speak the truth in love" and all they really do is point fingers and tell others how to live their lives. With that said, I think people need to hear the actual truth. If it is said in a polite and actually loving way, the truth can help people become better. People can hear the truth in a way that will still save their feelings but also help them become closer to the best person they need to be.

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      graceinusposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Rev. Akins- I like your answer and many thanks

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   celafoeposted 11 years ago

   That is a real problem today.   Few want  to hear the truth, and not many people are willing to speak the truth if  they think it will be taken as an attack because this is the most common result these days. 
   True love is saying  and/or doing what is correct (true) whether it is welcome or not
   So,no it is wrong to not speak the truth no matter the reason.

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      graceinusposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      celafoe- My Dad had a saying that goes like this:
      "It is far better to tell the truth and earn their respect, than to lie and keep a seceret.
      Thanks celafoe

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   snapbackbettyposted 11 years ago

   I go ahead and tell the truth no matter how much it may hurt. I have found that when someone lied to me to spare my feelings, I always ended up finding out the truth of the matter eventually and was even more hurt and upset about it. I wouldn't want to make anyone to suffer from those same feelings so I go ahead and say what ever it is that needs to be said and deal with the consiquences.

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      graceinusposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      snapbackbetty- I agree, truth should always be told. If a lie is discovered, the pain an a result usually cuts deeper. God bless

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   ketageposted 11 years ago

   Telling a person a lie to spare their feelings will only hurt them in the long run. Its better to tell the truth even if it hurts them for a while and spare them the pain of living with a lie.

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      graceinusposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      ketage- You are right , it best always to say the truth even if it hurts. Many thanks for your answer

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   blessedpposted 11 years ago

   Speak the truth speak it ever, cost it what it will.  I believe speaking the truth regardless of the repercussion.  But no matter how honest we are we all have been in a situation whereby we do not want to hurt another feelings.  I know I have.
   
   For Example
   
   A friend with a bad breath or smelly arm. We all have had that encounter but did we told that person that their mouth or arm needs help.  Instead, we bore the unfriendly odour and continue to allow that person to go around offending others and embarrassing themselves.
   
   Being truthful helps all of us, even if it hurts.

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      graceinusposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      blessedp- it seem so far that most agree that the truth is always the best answer. Thank you for your answer.

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   stanwshuraposted 11 years ago

   This is one of the toughest questions (yours and in real life) I ever have to answer.  I pride myself on being absolutely honest, so I would likely find a kind way to express an unpleasant truth (or opinion).   But no doubt, this one is a toughie.

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      graceinusposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      stanwshura- I thank you for your answer

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