how do you know if your partner is cheating

1. 61

   sweetjulieposted 14 years ago

   how do you know when your spouse is cheating

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   1. 67

      goldenpathposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Look for signs:
      Mysterious phone calls
      Periodic absenses without expanation
      Notes/Letters
      
      If you find any of these or anything you feel uneasy about then ask him straight out.  If you feel any kind of deception in his answer or defensiveness it is a red flag that "something" may not be right.
      
      I would suggest doing a hub search on the subject.  The best advice I would give is be watchful and always keep yourself unspotted.  Never give him the same reason to suspect foul play on your end.

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   2. 57

      andromidaposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I think the level of intimacy will certainly fall no matter how hard one tries to hide,one way or another you will be able to notice when your partner decrease doing the things he used to do before he starts cheating.

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      1. 67

         AnythingArtzyposted 14 years agoin reply to this

         so very wise and true.

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   3. 69

      alexandriaruthkposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      ask them and you will know, their eyes will say say it all
      
      lack and sudden lost of intimacy
      
      their cellphone is always secured and also email unlike before
      
      schedule is uncertain
      
      they are suddenly grooming
      
      they pick up fights immediately with you
      
      they are avoiding you
      
      check the receipts and credit card billings, if there is some items bought which you didnt see, restaurant billings which you didnt go together and motel etc

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   4. 0

      Poppa Bluesposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      If you have a suspicion, then thats an indication that something is wrong with your relationship. Whether he/she is cheating or not the problem needs to be addressed. The best thing to do is to speak openly about your feelings and get to the bottom of the underlying problem otherwise refer to my song "Forget Your Ex"!

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   5. 36

      curlytree2009posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      so true.

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   6. 0

      cosetteposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      you don't. even if all signs point to yes, people still deny it to themselves. if you really suspect your partner is cheating, talking to him or her won't do you any good - they will just lie about it.
      
      you will either have to start examining your phone bill or start looking for strange things like a cell phone that you don't know about or strange charges on your credit card, or unusual withdrawls from your bank account.
      
      this is why cheaters suck, they are not poor lost souls looking for love - they are sneaky and liars and would endanger their spouse just so they can get some sack time with some lowlife who, when it's all said and done, they will dump like a hot potato and beg you to take them back even as you slam the door in their face. who wants someone like that?

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   7. 36

      curlytree2009posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      How? Sometimes, signs aren't enough. Being sweet or romantic does not mean that he or she is not cheating, that's why there is fooling. You continue to believe even if you didn't know that he or she is fooling you.

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2. 60

   theirishobserver.posted 14 years ago

   Boots under the bed.....

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3. 58

   irishsoul28posted 14 years ago

   I think you just know in your heart. Put aside any paranoia you may have then think about all the things thats lead up to you thinking about this, if you still feel the same i would tell you to comfort your partner as calmly as possible.....then lose it if they have been cheating!!

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   1. 59

      globalserenityposted 14 years agoin reply to this

      This is a difficult topic indeed, simply because everyone is different. No two people are the same in their suspicions and what makes them suspect another of cheating, just the same as no cheater behaves the same way.
      
      Therefore, it doesn't seem to be possible to nail down exactly what to look for in every case.
      
      My suggestion? If someone suspects their partner of cheating, approaches their partner who then denies all accusations, and still feels there is something going on, why stay with that person? 
      
      The concept of cheating to couples often differs, which is to say sometimes they don't agree about exactly what cheating consists of in the first place. Also, whether its cheating or something less severe, either way, something about that person is rubbing you the wrong way....I say it's time to get out.
      
      The only reason to waste your energy playing sleuth, is to "catch someone in the act" so to speak.
      
      The point is, something is making you uncomfortable, and if its the unable to eat or sleep kind of uncomfortable, and the partner is denying having been a part of cheating, then just get out.
      
      At the very least that sort of "shaking of the sugar tree" as it were, can open up a new communication, so that the partner can better understand why it is the accuser feels that way.
      
      Or the partner will not try to get the accuser to stay at all, and though difficult, facing that the two parties are not compatible sooner rather than later is best.

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4. 63

   Wayne Orvisburgposted 14 years ago

   When as he walks out the door he says he's going to his girlfriend's house.

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5. 68

   Pearldiverposted 14 years ago

   I guess I first worked out that she was cheating when I noticed that every day for 3 years, there seemed to always be another guy with his arm around her, who kept smiling at me and was too young to be her father

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6. 58

   irishsoul28posted 14 years ago

   Maybe tell us why you think your partner could be cheating so we could give a better answer?

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7. 57

   TerryGlposted 14 years ago

   I wrote a hub about software that allows you to monitor your partners cell phone.
   
   I had trepidations writing the hub because truthfully, would you really want to know. Listening in on a cell phone conversation would be gut retching to me.
   
   Unless there is proof, time dates who when and how, speculation can always bring you down or do your head in.

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8. 60

   theirishobserver.posted 14 years ago

   If you find panties in his pocket and they are not yours...although he may be cross dressing...which means you will have more clothes to choose from and you can enjoy shopping together....

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9. 60

   theirishobserver.posted 14 years ago

   If you find a bra in his pocket and they are not yours...although he may be cross dressing...which means you will have more clothes to choose from and you can enjoy shopping together...

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10. 60

    theirishobserver.posted 14 years ago

    I write stars for my friends and family, what is your star Anythingartzy....

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11. 61

    Greg Cremiaposted 14 years ago

    loss of weight
    new clothes
    extra grooming
    new look
    excuses you did not ask for
    their friends treat you differently
    happy for unknown reasons
    unhappy for unknown reasons
    cold look in their eyes
    
    you find yourself asking this question

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12. 59

    hollywoodjamesposted 14 years ago

    Please read my hub to answer this question.

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