How could I not?

1. 57

   dee106posted 14 years ago

   Ok, So I am asking for a little advice.  I was with my ex for ten years we were only married for a little over 5 months.  We have two little girls together, and he beat me up for the first time in our kitchen with my then 10 month old daughter in my arms.  He wasn't just cheating he was using meth.  So I left and filed for divorce.  Taking my two children, only to keep hearing about him and this other woman using meth together and beating up their property, and each other.  So my divorce became final due to money issues I allowed him to have joint physical custody with every other weekend visits.  He came to me two weeks ago talked about his addiction and his violent relationship.  I recorded it because I am just not too trusting of him.  He went one week before using again, to which I don't have proof of, and went back to that relationship. 
   Now that was a little background, my girls are two and three, and have no way to protect themselves.  My ex moved in with her, and the only thing in my favor right now is that he neglected to send me 30 days advanced notice on his address, and refuses my request to not take the girls to that house.  He has never come to where I live to shop, and they did this week.  He had the nerve to approach me Spun out completely asking me if I have my kids.  I just turned around and ignored him.  He started yelling over me trying to get my girls attention.  I turned around and explained to him and his girlfriend, that if he doesn't leave us alone that I will get a restraining order on them both.  My kids don't need to see him like that.  You know he wanted to fight me..lol.  I walked away as he was screaming at me.  I honestly don't need that around my kids, and fear for my safety as well as theirs.  How could I not....But, I am running out of ideas What can I do to keep my kids safe.

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2. 60

   SpanStarposted 14 years ago

   The first thing I believe is a positive is if I'm reading this right is he's doing these things in public and I say that because this is a good opportunity to gather evidences.  My recommendation is find a good friend that's good with with video cameras and still cameras.  Have your good friend remain out-of-sight at all times and should these events happen again in public get as much footage as you can and even if you have to endure these verbal assaults more then once with your kids then maybe this should give the courts enough evidences to take stronger messages against your ex.
   
        That would be my suggestion

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   1. 57

      dee106posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      I have him on video recording not even two weeks ago admitting to beating up his girlfriend or supplier.  He also admitted that he has a problem with meth.  Some of the things he doesn't isn't on recording.  I might be able to get a copy from the store I was at with the girls.  But I doubt they would release it without a supoena.

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3. 61

   SomewayOuttaHereposted 14 years ago

   i think i'd talk to a group that is familiar with family breakdown (mental health and addictions problems will of course and unfortunately be an area they'd be well versed on).  i'd also connect with the police (depends on where u live tho) just to let them know what is happening for u - where i live we have a community liaison cop who could/can be a good source of info. especially if his behaviour escalates.
   
   sheesh - you're not in a good situation are you?

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   1. 57

      dee106posted 14 years agoin reply to this

      Thank you very much for your posts, I really appreciate it.  The real tough thing here is that I am a cop.  I have talked to my chief who is aware, but because so much of this is civil plus the fact I can't file exparte  or restraining order papers because it will cost me my job, because he will in turn file right back on me.  I wouldn't be able to carry a weapon while working.

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4. 83

   donotfearposted 14 years ago

   A meth addict is dangerous and upredictable, as you well know. Keep your babies away from him. Did you know that if you file a report with CPS of his violent & erratic behavior during visitation or in their presence that they can order him to drug test? Did you know that if he tests positive for a drug like meth he can be blocked from contact with them? Better to be safe than sorry. If CPS knocks on his door and he's cooking the stuff, he's popped. I know for a fact that if somebody tests positive for it the children will be removed & placed with another family member. That's the way it is in Texas. Keep them away from him!!

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