What would you do if your child indicates that h/she wants to become transgendered?
Perhaps, you are not familiar with trans issues, so I hope to help you a little. First of all, it's "transgender" not "transgendered." That's a common mistake. Second, trans people don't "want to become transgender," they simple are. Being transgender can mean many things. In simplest terms, it's when someone is born one biological sex, but identifies as the opposite sex, such as a male identifying as female. I have written a few articles on trans issues if you wish to check them out.
I'd like to say that Social Thoughts is spot-on.
If I had such a child, I'd say that the surgical option would not be available on my watch. My child would need to reach the age of majority first. Then he or she would have my emotional support for that decision, if that big step is what he or she truly wanted. (SRS is not the only option.)
In the interim, I would be agreeable to legally changing his or her name to an androgynous one, like Chris.
If and only if he or she requested it, counseling by a COMPETENT mental health professional would also be appropriate -- assuming that I could find one.
Dressing in a way that's appropriate to his or her gender of choice would also be OK. In order to avoid extreme, and possibly life-threatening bullying by his or her peers at a public school, I'd give serious consideration to home schooling.
If we went with the home schooling option, it would be desirable to find wholesome opportunities for peer socialization within a tolerant social environment. Toward that end, I'd also give serious consideration to joining the Unitarian Universalist Church.
I won't be happy about it, but it is not like they are doing anything wrong and as parent, don't you just want your kids to be happy? But, I won't pay for it, if they want to do it, they have to wait for they are after 18 and work, to pay for the surgery him/herself.
Social Thoughts is right - it's "transgender" not "transgendered" - and there is no choice in it, they just are.
If my child came to me and said that their internal gender didn't match that of the outside, then I would be supportive, and investigate and organise anything that needed to happen to help them on the road to making their outside match their insides - be that slowing down puberty so that they could be sure, or investigating hormones etc if they are past puberty.
We had a "surprise" baby - found out external gender at the moment of their birth, not before. And a saying I really like about all this is about how everyone just wants a healthy baby, it doesn't matter what gender.
"If it didn't matter before they were born, why does it now?"
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