Wasn't worried before but now...

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   Crazdwriterposted 13 years ago

   Before I said about my pap smear and how now I have to go in next Tuesday for an ultrasound. I wasn't worried before but then yesterday my doc called me and said that my white cell count was high from the urine sample...he said it was probably contaminated but I am no worried more about the ultrasound and the whole call. Mom and dad, and hubby and my friends keep telling me not to worry but how can I not with a phone call saying that my white blood cell is high and also that I need an ultrasound because my left side of my pelvis is fuller than the right? And I know for a fact that I'm not pregnant.
   
   I'm scared and worried. I know I shouldn't stress but I can't help it...and I don't want to worry my mom by talking to her about and all my husband is saying is don't worry.
   
   What can I do to keep myself from stressing so dang much?

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      Faybe Bayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      First take a deep breath! Okay I am going to get a link for you. I'll be right back, it's not mine but another  hubber, so wait a second. Deep Breath!

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      sandra rinckposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      What did you go in for?

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         Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         I went in for my pap smear and my physical last Tuesday...he said to get an iltrasound and then called yesterday about the white cell count in my uraine test...

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            sandra rinckposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            Okay, I wasn't sure if you went in for something else and then got a pap and all the other stuff.
            
            For sure, don't worry about it right now.  About 6 years ago I went in for a pap and ended up having cervical cancer.  Anyways, good thing they caught it early enough to have it removed... twice.
            
            The point is, don't get too worked up until you find out for sure what the deelio is. 

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               Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

               I'm glad that they caught it early for you, chica! and twice? wow....I am really glad that u r good to go now..and trying not to worry but dang it's hard.

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                  sandra rinckposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                  It is.  I suppose I was trying to make you feel better by saying that it could be something easily taken care of and you could be getting your stomach all in knotts over something that will be just fine.
                  
                  Anyways, I will pray for you, already have and hope you find something to keep your mind off your troubles.  OOOh I know, watch 300, that movie usually makes me forget a lot of things.

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                     Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                     I do feel a bit better...I guess talking to you all about it helps. Thanks for the prayers and the positive thoughts. I will do my best not to worry too much. and will definitely keep u guys updated on what happens.
                     
                     dang it I don't have 300 here at my parents house
                     Will have to find a different one to watch hehehe

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                        sandra rinckposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                        How 'bout Gladiator, Troy, Braveheart. hehehe.

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                           Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                           Nope none of those either...my parents have the Fugitive, ooo maybe Dance with Wolves...haven't seen that one in a loooong time not gory but hey it's cute lmao

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                              sandra rinckposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                              How about comedy.  Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Nepoleon Dynamite, Blades of Glory.  OMG, Blades of Glory is too much.  I literally laughed out loud for about five minutes during the first skating duo.

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                                 Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

                                 I did see bits and pieces of that on one of my plane rides over to Hawaii. I was laughing too..trying not to too loud because no one else was laughing lol
                                 
                                 hahaha Dirty Dancing is on

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      Katrina Arielposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      As Faybe Bay said, take deep breaths. Remind yourself that you are probably perfectly fine, and even if there is a concern, your body is capable of amazing self healing.
      
      Worrying adds stress that increases all kinds of not so nice conditions. You are most likely well aware of this. What I like to do when I'm getting all worked up is to soften, breathe, and meditate. Tap into whatever you believe in your heart to be the goodness of the universe. Let yourself trust that you are totally taken care of.

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         Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         I'll try to breathe thanks for the advice Katrina

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      IzzyMposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Have a joint! Chill out
      Seriously, a raise in white cell count is indicative of an infection, and UTI's (urinary tract infections) are really common and absolutely nothing to worry about.
      Yeah if I were you I'd write more hubs or anything at all to keep your mind occupied. We are all here for you

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         Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         Keeping my mind occupied...that sounds nice too bad it working.
         Thanks Izzy I wish I oculd write more hubs..but my brain is dead on hubs right now..

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            Faybe Bayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            This is a quote my sister and I both use for fear. It is from Dune. Ironically we just reconnected after many years, and knew nothing about each other as she was raised by someone else. When she sent me the quote I was shocked. It was my favorite too.
            
            I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

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               Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

               I like that quote. I'll have to reread it again and again until I figure out what is going on with my body.

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      starme77posted 13 years agoin reply to this

      stress is not good for you in this situation , make a list of things you need to do around the house , or favorite things you like to do for fun, then start on the list, do one thing at a time , when you get finished with one , go back to the list and do the next thing on the list, things to help you keep your mind busy and off of the problem until you get the true results

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   Faybe Bayposted 13 years ago

   Okay this is the real deal. People have been following him for two years, asking advise etc. I can tell you the first thing he would say is go buy a pregnancy test. I know you're not pregnant and so do you, but if it comes up negative then you can be pretty sure you're fine. Cancer will show up as a false positive. I knew this to be true because an aunt of mine was pregnant for eight months before the docs found out it was a tumor.
   
   Fybroids will cause the same symptoms you are having, but they are not cancerous.

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      Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Wow Faye I didn't know that cancer would come up as a false postitive. that is very interesting to know. Thanks for telling me that!
      
      Sorry to hear about you aunt.

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         Faybe Bayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         She went on to have twelve kids, two sets of twins.

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            Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

            12 kids? with 2 sets of twins? Wow that is amazing. So glad she could have kids.

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   Rochelle Frankposted 13 years ago

   The good news that you have your tests scheduled soon, so you won't have to wait too long.
   I don't know how you keep yourself from worrying, except to try to convince yourself that it will not help anything. If you want,some of us will volunteer to worry for you-- but, actually we will be sending good thoughts your way.
   Write! Either about your feelings, or about something else that is completely different.

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      Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      THanks Rochelle and no I don't want anyone else to have to worry for me...that is why I didn't talk to my mom about it because I don't want her to worry.
      
      And yea writing might help some...I'll have to try that. *sigh* I am going out later with friends and I want to have fun..not sitting there lost in my worry and thoughts.

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   goldenpathposted 13 years ago

   Face the fear, head on.  You are an individual, a special one at that.  Fear only serves to destroy.  Starting now, learn all you can about cell counts.  Become well informed and on top of it.  Just remember, your dignity is your own and is nurtured solely by you.  No matter what the cell count is or the result may be, it cannot change who you are at heart - unless you let it through fear.  I have every confidence in your stamina to overcome whatever ails you and I believe you shall reign victorious in both body and spirit.

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      Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks Goldenpath. I will definitely check out the info about cell counts. Might help calm me down a bit

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   Rochelle Frankposted 13 years ago

   I like goldenpath's advice-- read it  a couple of times.

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   Faybe Bayposted 13 years ago

   You know, you could start a hub about how you are feeling right now, in this way regardless of the outcome you will have it started. As you deal with your stress, write about what you can do to cope, and as Goldenpath said, do some research, bookmark that and add to your hub as you feel ready.
   
   In this way you are taking positive action, and should the question come up later for another Hubber, you will already have the hub ready to help them face their fear and walk through it.

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      Crazdwriterposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      THat is a good idea...I might have to do that. but right now I am working on my netbook and dang it tiny lol getting use to it all over again

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   KCC Big Countryposted 13 years ago

   I had been having a dull ache/pain in my lower back on the left side.  I went in about 2 weeks ago now and I was sent for an ultrasound and CT scan.  They discovered I have a golf ball-sized cyst on my left ovary.  After getting the results back, I was sent to my OB/GYN.  He still can't detect it with his exam.  So, we've caught it very early.  There is a blood test called "CA125" that he sent me for to determine the liklihood of it being cancerous.  I got the results this week and all is good.  He said they like to know that before going in.  So, now I only have to decide when to have surgery and how much I want him to remove.  Due to my age (nearing menopause) he recommends removing both ovaries and my uterus.  For younger women, he said he would only remove the cyst.
   
   Crazdwriter...you'll feel tons better just having the test done.  I wish you luck!

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      SandyMcCollumposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      Let the doctor take them out! Seriously, my life has been so improved since I had mine out. I was only 38 then, and if you take HRT the resulting surgical menopause isn't so bad. I recommend it to everyone who's finished having kids. ;~)

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         KCC Big Countryposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         Thanks for your advice!  I do intend to have the full hysterectomy.  I am very much looking forward to it.  My doctor said the body should be put on hormones within 4 hours of surgery.  He said I will wake up with a patch.  He said we can decide later whether I want to do the patch or the pills.  He said it is usually a 5 year treatment.

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            Beth100posted 13 years agoin reply to this

            My sister had a full hysterectomy three years ago due to cancerous fibroids (yes, they can be).  She did not go on HRT immediately as her oncologist told her that some women require the treatment, and others don't.  She was told to be aware of the signs:  hot/cold flashes, sweats, fever, etc. If she experienced these, then she would need to go on HRT.  However, she never did experience any of these symptoms and has not needed to follow HRT after her surgery.  Again, it depends on the person and what the situation is.  Good luck KCC!
            
            And Crazd, keep breathing.  The answer is drawing closer. xox

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      Rochelle Frankposted 13 years agoin reply to this

      I was thinking about ovarian cysts, too, because I had several different kinds and had them all out at once when I was 26. I already had one child.
      After I had my second baby, two years later, my Dr. said he was surprised I had another child because of the extensiveness of the surgery. He wisely did not worry me with that information, and did not tell me until after my second son was born whole and normal.
      I healed quickly and did not have any additional problems in that area.
      This was all in the days before CT scans and any of that stuff-- they know so much more now.

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         KCC Big Countryposted 13 years agoin reply to this

         
         
         That's really what I was trying to convey to Crazd....being as young as she is, her doctor's advice may be different than mine (assuming she finds out she has cysts). My own doctor said his advice would be different for a young woman still wanting to have children.  Those days are long over for me.
         
         The doctor said the ultrasound is much better at detecting things in this area than the CT scan is anyway.  It's all rather remarkable equipment that has greatly helped women today.

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   Shadesbreathposted 13 years ago

   That's why god invented alcohol and gave it to man in prehistoric times.  Like everyone else has said, I bet this all turns out perfectly fine.  However, because YOU are the one dealing with it, all that optimism doesn't change the fact that you are going to worry anyway.  That's what we humans do.  And that is why god gave us booze.  So drink up.

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   Ghost32posted 13 years ago

   Crazd, it sounds like on the medical and maybe even the mental side(s), you've got plenty of support on here already.  I did have one thought as I was reading the posts:
   
   Why not, if you can't eliminate the nerves, at least USE that stress to create a hub series.  You know, like: 
   
   1.  How To Get News On A Pap Smear (Bet that'd grab readers by the gazillions.)
   
   2.  What A High White Cell Count Means (Subheading:  Or Does Not Mean)
   
   3.  Etc. Etc.
   
   Just a thought.  Might earn you a Pulitzer of sumthin'....

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    Beth100posted 13 years ago

    Hey Craz'd!  Take a deep, deep breath and let it out slowly.  Nothing is gained by worrying, expect anxiety, nervousnous and fear.  Goldenpath is correct -- read about it, and ask questions (direct and pointed) to the doctor when you see him.  The tests are around the corner, which is great.  Make a list of questions, but most importantly, gain knowledge of what you could be dealing with.  It's amazing how we can stop the worrying once we understand what we are facing.  In the end, I believe that you will be fine.  All my prayers and love my friend!  xox

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    SandyMcCollumposted 13 years ago

    Crazd, what can I say that everyone else hasn't said? Ditto all of them, but some good healing waves from my direction. It'll all turn out good, you'll see. I knew someone who went through quite a bit and it turned out he had blocked gas, causing his pain. I hope it's something as simple as that.

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    Brenda Durhamposted 13 years ago

    Hoping for a good report from the doc, Crazdwriter.

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    K Partinposted 13 years ago

    Best of luck to you Crazd. I wish nothing but the best to you. Positive thoughts! K.

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    skyfireposted 13 years ago

    CW, stop taking things so seriously, let's spam ...

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    emievilposted 13 years ago

    Hey crazd, you'll do fine. Please try not to worry too much. I'm sure everything's all right.

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    ThoughtfulSpotposted 13 years ago

    Crazd - as others have said, try to keep busy.  If you're a worrier, you're a worrier.  I know I am.  In the past couple years, I've had 2 suspicious breast lumps. (One biopsied, and one went away on its own - turned out to be a clogged milk duct as I was expecting my first child at the time.)  I also recently had a suspicious mole biopsied.  All 3 turned out to be nothing, thankfully.  I tried everything I could to tell myself not to stress, it won't do any good, blah, blah, blah.  But, I worry.  Its what I do.  I've gotten better about it over the years because I know the stress isn't good for me.  But, I've also become a little more accepting of who I am, because otherwise, I'd start worrying about worrying!   So, here's what I do... I hope it helps:
    
    1) Tell someone - you already did that.  Us!
    2) Research - Not too much though, I'll convince myself I have 5 other things.  I research enough to hopefully eliminate some of my biggest fears.  For example, finding out how far they've come in treatments for even some of the worst scenarios.
    3) Give myself a positive talking to and commit to not wasting any time sitting around having an anxiety attack.  (My brain my not follow instructions, but at least I've laid down the law.)
    4) Make plans and keep busy.  Think about everything except that stupid test.  (At this point, I figure I've done all I can, and I can't take any more positive actions until the app't is done with.  Anything else I do involving my worry will be a step backwards.)
    
    So, lame as it is to say this, try not to worry.  Focus on each moment (a one day at a time, kind of thing, but even more minute... one task at a time.)
    
    Meanwhile, I'll be thinking of you and sending positive thoughts your way.

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    Crazdwriterposted 13 years ago

    Thanks everyone for the advice...I did keep myself busy yesterday went out with friends and then today helped my mom with my paranoid alzheimerezs grandma...wasn't fun but it did help me keep my mind off of it for a while.
    
    and skyfire you're on let's go spam
    
    and yes I am breathing....slowly and trying to calm myself with other thoughts
    
    and yes Ghost I am thinking about some hubs...might not write them now but later...seriously sadly not in the mood to write

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       Faybe Bayposted 13 years agoin reply to this

       Sometimes I just open a hub, give it a title and write. I don't have to publish it, I can even delete it.
       
       Another good one is going to YouTube, and looking up old funny stuff, or songs you haven't heard in years. This is an outtake from the Carol Burnett show. They are playing a game like trivial pursuit or password and Tim is trying to justify his answer of Elephant
       
       http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qqE_WmagjY

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