You are handed a microphone and asked to make the toast to the Bride & Groom at

1. 59

   fpherj48posted 10 years ago

   You are handed a microphone and asked to make the toast to the Bride & Groom at their Wedding
   
   Describe word for word how you would present this important toast.

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   lorddraven2000posted 10 years ago

   Marriage is a three ring circus! engagement ring, wedding ring and then suffeRING! Nah but I did use this joke at my little brother's wedding. Really it is best to be persoal with it so for me I would have to know the individuals personally

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      fpherj48posted 10 years agoin reply to this

      That's pretty funny!  LOL....You could always start out with that just to get everyone's attention and set the mood.......Then, I guess you could do the serous philosophical toast!!!

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      MizBejabbersposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I hope I'm not asked to give the toast at my granddaughter's wedding this April. That's the one I'll use, thank you.

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      fpherj48posted 10 years agoin reply to this

      MzB......What I wouldn't give to be there!!    LOL

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   tsadjatkoposted 10 years ago

   
   
   I'd start with,
   
   "Well good evening ladies and gentlemen. I've been asked to make a toast to the Bride and Groom."
   
   Then accolades are screamed at me from the reception floor.
   
   "Who are you?"
   
   "Where's the best man?"
   
   "Who is this guy?" "We don't know you!"
   
   "Hey, that's Chevy Chase!"
   
   "Wow, yeah it's him! I recognize him!
   
   I continue, "Thank you, thank you, you're all too kind, now if you...
   
   From the floor, " Who's Chevy Chase?"
   
   "Not me I assure you, if you'll just settle down," I say as someone yanks hard on the microphone cord nearly pulling my arm out of it's socket. I pull back and for a few minutes we have a tug of war with the microphone, falling on the floor, knocking over chairs and pushing tables around. I try to calm things down by starting the toast and there is tremendous feedback over the speakers which causes everyone to cover their ears and scream.
   
   Two huge guys, Frik and Frak pick me off the floor by my arms and start to carry me out of the reception. I'm like, "But guys I was asked to give the toast!"
   
   Frik looks at Frak and says "Oh, he was asked to give the toast!" Frak quips back "Oh, he's toast alright". 
   
   You know, I had a toast to give, really, I just never know what will happen on these hub page Q&As.

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      fpherj48posted 10 years agoin reply to this

      T....ROFLMAO...I pictured this entire scenario. Sounds to me like it may have been the highlight of the entire event. Really funny, T. Now, tell me. TRUTH..is that a picture of you or Chevy?  Frik 'n Frak seem to follow where ever U go.!

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      tsadjatkoposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      That's Chevy, he got famous by recreating my misadventures. ;-)

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      fpherj48posted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Then I strongly suggest you send for your share of his millions!  He's got a a lot of nerve!

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      tsadjatkoposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I tried, Judge said alleged recreations were too absurd to actually have occurred in real life. I was so upset he threw the case out I tripped over my lawyer, grabbed his tie to break my fall,slammed his head on table,bailiff thought "gun shot' and

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      fpherj48posted 10 years agoin reply to this

      T...sounds to me that you are simply an accident-waiting-to-happen.  Best you decline all invitations & just stay home & watch football.

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      tsadjatkoposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      What invitations?Everyone knows to keep me away,despite the judge's ruling! Great Q&A though,I figured everyone would have a good toast to share,well give it time.lorddraven's is a good one I've never heard before,doubt I'll ever get to use it.

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      fpherj48posted 10 years agoin reply to this

      "despite the judge's ruling.".....LMAO!

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   tirelesstravelerposted 10 years ago

   To life, to love and to happiness! Lift the glass and drink.  Have been to two weddings where the best man talked for 30 minutes and never actually offered the toast. The D.J. stepped in and saved us at one wedding and the maid of honor, who was delightfully interesting. stepped in at the other and with a quick anecdote wrapped the whole toast in a couple of sentences.

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      fpherj48posted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I hear you..   Can't give a microphone or the spotlight to some people....they think they're filming a feature-length film, with them as the star!!  LOL

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