Will more children make a happy home?
Many people now opt for two children or one child. In the olden days couples had more children and such family atmosphere was often innocently endearing and emotionally self-sufficient.
I think that TV is largely responsible for making large families look like they are having more fun.
The Brady Bunch
I think that the happiness of the kids would directly spring from the happiness of the parents. If they are providing a nice home environment, nurturing love, and caring-- kids can flourish and become much more happy than otherwise.
Personally, I feel that we have enough kids on the planet. There are so many kids that need a good loving home, that I would feel guilty having a child of my own-- when there are so many kids that need to be adopted.
Have you seen the movie "The Dying Rooms"? You can find this on youtube in a 4 part series.
It's about a number of abandoned girls in China, that ultimately end up in orphanages where they have a very slim chance of survival. It is a very tough film to watch, but I feel everyone should see it.
The Waltons presents a very realistic image of the large family as impoverished and struggling. More children do not make for a happy home as evidenced in this tv series. In fact, it makes for a highly stressed and chaotic and impoverished home!
It's nice that you see it that way, but it's a different reality than the one I know. I'm keenly aware of an "olden days" family of eight children in which the father and the eldest brother forced the eldest sister to incest with both of them...and that household was definitely not just an isolated example.
Unless that's what you meant by "innocently endearing and emotionally self-sufficient".
Another example, six children, all girls--five remained after one blew her own brains out when she was twenty-something.
I could go on, but....
No. The number of kids you have has nothing to do with your happiness. People often have kids because they think that it will improve things around the house. A child ads to the responsibilities as much as it can bring happiness if not more.
People have to be willing to gladly accept all of the responsibilities and be able to devote the necessary resources to the child. This puts a heavy financial burden as well as time management on those living there. It can often increase stress and make things worse.
The premise that the more, the merrier is totally atavistic. Large families often add more stress to the family, especially if the family is a one income family. The father is stressed out because there is a large number of children to support!
In the old days we had not moved to the nuclear family (core family, mother, father, kids). It was more of an extended family situation where kid, parents and often grandparents live together or in very close proximity.
I think more kids are great if the parents have the right personality to handle it.
If you really look into history, families have always had the same problems we do today. But when we look back, it is so easy to remember only the good stuff.
I wish it was like in the movies, but it just isn't like that in real life with various personalities trying to live together.
There may be truth in your observation, but it is not because of the number of children in the family. It was a different mindset in the "olden days". There was far less distraction to whittle away at the family, the neighborhood, and the community.
To expect children to make a happy home is to place FAR too much responsibility upon their childhood.
Children should be a reflection of a happy marriage, not the ties that bind a family. They should be viewed as a reward , not a scorekeeper.
Large families used to be glorified and idealized as evidenced by early television shows such as THERE IS ALWAYS ROOM FOR ONE MORE and THE BRADY BUNCH. However, the reality belies the glorified images of large family life. Large family life is often chaotic and stress ridden for the parents and children alike in more ways than one. read more
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