What Are You AFRAID Of? Really?

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   gmwilliamsposted 14 months ago

   
   Why are people content to be ordinary?   Why are people afraid to be extraordinary?   Are they fearful of greatness & prefer to be anonymous?

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      Nathanvilleposted 14 months agoin reply to this

      •    What’s wrong with wanting to be ordinary?
      •    Who’s afraid? and
      •    What people are afraid to be extraordinary?
      
      Apart from the fact that there is nothing wrong in being ordinary if you want to be, I know plenty of people who are ambitious and achieve things.

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         DrMark1961posted 14 months agoin reply to this

         Totally agree here. I think more of us need to be happy with what we have and not feel the need to be unhappy if we do not do something society considers extraordinary.
         After I read your post I had to go to my bookshelves to find a book I read years ago, "How to want what you have" by a PHD psychologist, Timothy Miller. Basically his thoughts were "let us appreciate what we already have and quit worrying about getting more stuff".
         There is nothing wrong with wanting to be ordinary in life, and I am not "ordinaryphobic".

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            Nathanvilleposted 14 months agoin reply to this

            Absolutely
            
            I haven’t read the book, but I did find a reference to it on the web which reads:-
            
            “How to Want What You Have: Discovering the Magic and Grandeur of Ordinary Existence.”
            
            “Convincing readers that wanting what they have is the secret of happiness, the author offers a practical method to achieve this end by applying principles of compassion, attention, and gratitude to everyday living.”
            
            In reading the above description it sounds like a great book, which if I had the time would no doubt enjoy.  And certainly accords with my philosophy on life:  “applying principles of compassion, attention, and gratitude to everyday living.”

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               gmwilliamsposted 14 months agoin reply to this

               Good morning, all.   Many people lead gray lives i.e. monotonous lives.   It is very sad to lead a gray life of quiet desperation.   One wants to make a significant mark.   It is totally dreadful to merely exist instead of being fully alive, living to one's ultimate human potential.

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                  DrMark1961posted 14 months agoin reply to this

                  Yes, as Thoreau said "the mass of men live lives of quiet desperation". However I think there is a big difference in that state of being and living an ordinary life.

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                  Nathanvilleposted 14 months agoin reply to this

                  Leading an ordinary life does not mean living a monotonous life; my life is far from monotonous.
                  
                  I might lead a relatively normal life, but I don’t merely exist, I am fully alive.
                  
                  What’s more important, making a significant mark, or enjoying life to the full?
                  
                  Yeah, sure, you can make a significant mark and live life to the full; but equally, you can leave a significant mark and be ill contented with life.  Whereas, I know plenty of people who live ordinary lives, and are very happy.
                  
                  Happiness is not measured by wealth or achievements.

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                  tsmogposted 14 months agoin reply to this

                  I think it is a matter of attitude and mindset.
                  
                  For instance, before arriving here to read the forums (6:30 am because of the heat wave here in sunny Southern Calif) I weeded section one of my landscape. It is about a 10' x 40' area with some weeds as tall as a foot or more with a 1/4"+ stalk. I have to use my weeding tool hit with a hammer to cut them off at the ground while pulling the rest.
                  
                  Background . . . I am 68 and have COPD/Emphysema, so it doesn't take long to huff and puff. And, I am not a spry young man.
                  
                  Well, I put on my cool-man-McGoo gardening hat, which is key and headed out. I was assured if any saw me they would know I was an expert with experience.
                  
                  I had the goal to be done in the typical 30 minutes and only take two breaks to catch my breath. I was determined to achieve victory with the hope of setting a new record.
                  
                  I did set a record. Hooray! Plus, when I went inside my blood pressure and heart rate were where they were supposed to be. The mundane became significant and I will have a smile all day today.

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                  1. 83

                     gmwilliamsposted 14 months agoin reply to this

                     Please take care of yourself.   It starts with baby steps.

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