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Not Happy in Your Relationship? What you can do

Updated on October 27, 2010


Remember those old leather shoes you couldn’t live without, you absolutely loved them. After all these years you decided to pull them out the closet so you can wear those precious shoes again; only to see that the sole fell off, you felt awful because you loved those shoes. You decided to take action because they were your favorite, and sought help from your local shoe maker for quick repair. Ahh…just like new. That old suit that brought you a ton of compliments; you only needed an inch taken out on each side to fit nicely once again. You take it to a seamstress because you would never think of throwing it away; it’s far too special for that. Ahh… they fixed it perfectly.


Why not put that same thought into your unhappy relationship. Sit back and think of how snug you once felt with that special person. Think of how they once made you feel. Think of how the two of you used to laugh together, pray together, walked together, planned together, slept together, talked together, come on think of some more pleasant thoughts together.


So, how can you get back to that special place? The same way it took effort to get those shoes or suit fixed. It will take effort; it’s never too late to go back to what used to work. Put your stubbornness and pride on the shelf and say let’s make things back to the way they were. Communicate with one another without taking offense. Talk about what and how each of you felt you got to where you are. Problems cannot be solved without communication. Make it clear that nothing is said to hurt one or the other feelings. Put sensitivity aside and be ready to have truthful talk. Understand without honest talk it is virtually impossible to fix a problem. Stop taking everything personal and know that you two once shared a special love towards one another and you can bring that distance that has grown in between you two back together again.


Healthy but sometimes unhappy relationships always have the prospect of being repairable. Take time together; leave your everyday regular surroundings. Plan a nice reunion weekend with just the two of you. Pick a day that’s special, like the day you were married. Try this suggestion, go to a couple’s spa, followed by dinner for two and then for one on one talk stay at a bed and breakfast. Have your fireplace going and don’t stop the honest talk.


In the back of your mind while you talk, remember how you never wanted to give up those shoes or suit. Well your mate is worth fighting for. You two have probably gone through many good times as well as hard times. Don’t let it go. Don’t try and play tit for tat. Act grown up and have mature sensible talk. Nothing is ever resolved by trying to hurt one another. Try and talk it out even if it takes all night to get and answer to where and how your relationship began to turn unhappy. Then talk of a plan to get back to where you once were.


You two were attracted to one another for a reason, don’t quit on you. Remember we are talking about being unhappy, which can be fixed. We are not talking about an abusive relationship that most times cannot be fixed. Plan once a month dates to spend time alone. No TV, No video games, No sports and turn off the cell phones.


Make it special find a nice intimate spot that will now be your favorite spot of special new memories. Nothing happens over night. Work hard at it and make you relationship more of a priority than some inanimate object. Happy relationships make happy people, which in turn make strong happy families.   


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    • ccurry profile image

      Carolyn Curry 5 years ago from US

      Great info I love it.. excited to read some more of your work.

    • Captain Jimmy profile image

      Captain Jimmy 7 years ago from WV

      The most important relationship you can have is with Jesus then he will lead you to that special person that he has for you. Fro the beginning God ordained marriage with one man and one woman. Not try every shoe until you find one that fits! Seek him first.

      Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

      Genesis 3:20 And Adam called his wife's name Eve; because she was the mother of all living.

      Matthew 19:3 The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?

      Matthew 19:4 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female,

      Matthew 19:5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?

      Matthew 19:6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.