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jump to last post 1-1 of 1 discussions (6 posts)

Why do people say that friends are the family we choose?

  1. deecoleworld profile image80
    deecoleworldposted 3 years ago

    Why do people say that a best friend or even friends are the family we chose? Do you agree or disagree with this statement? I used to believe that but I'm not sure if I do anymore. The distinction and boundaries between family and friends seem very clear and very separate? What are your opinions?

    1. Sed-me profile image82
      Sed-meposted 3 years agoin reply to this

      Hmmm... not sure what kind of explanation would help.

      We can't choose our family. Some of us don't have good relationships with our families.
      We can become very close to our friends. They can become as close as family, some ppl having life long relationships.

      Do I agree? It hasn't been my experience, but I don't put it past others.

      1. gmwilliams profile image83
        gmwilliamsposted 3 years agoin reply to this

        A multillion percent in agreement!

      2. deecoleworld profile image80
        deecoleworldposted 3 years agoin reply to this

        @Sed-me: I often feel as though we don't treat friends the same way we treat family, even though a lot of people claim that friends are the family we choose. There is a very clear distinction between family and friends. Sometimes I feel we let family get away with a lot more then friends (not all the time, and it depends on the situation).

        Picture this scenario: Imagine if your mom used to be a crackhead that caused terror in your family. She abused, lied, deceived, stole from you among other things. Years and many rehab stints later you see her and she's clean and she wants a second chance for a better relationship. You give her that .......... but imagine if it had been a friend?"

        I know if that was a close friend that hurt me like that I don't think I'll be able to even listen to what she had to say, let alone forgive her. I'll probably give that chance to my mother though. Like if you had to choose would you choose your best friend or your mother?

        We are tied to family by blood and obligation. We aren't bind to our friends; technically there is nothing to hold us to our friends except choice. Friends come and go, family will always be there (even if they are shitty/don't get along) and you can't deny that fact. How can friends be the family we choose? That is a bit unfair to put them in the same category

    2. gmwilliams profile image83
      gmwilliamsposted 3 years agoin reply to this

      BTW, love that avatar of the sweet little kitty.

      1. deecoleworld profile image80
        deecoleworldposted 3 years agoin reply to this

        @gmwilliams thanks!!!

 
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