How does one learn to love oneself?

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  1. Dim Flaxenwick profile image77
    Dim Flaxenwickposted 8 years ago

    How does one learn to love oneself?

    Have just been listening to the song ´The greatest love of all¨ but if your natural personality is shy, self-worthless, always thinking the other person knows best. , your opinion doesn´t matter... How can one love oneself? Can it really be learned.?

  2. Daniel J. Neumann profile image61
    Daniel J. Neumannposted 8 years ago

    Dim Flaxenwick,

    See God within yourself. If you're in love with perfection (which, would be the case, if you believe you're worthless, always wrong), then notice perfection within you. Now, obviously, you're never going to have a perfect thought or anything like that (and thinking that way got you into this mess)—but appreciate the functionality of your vessel, your body: how atoms materializing you come together, cells harmonizing, and your flawless heartbeat.

    Realize that you're a work of art from the ultimate Creator. You're beautiful. Love this.

    Thanks for the question,


  3. Apostle Jack profile image61
    Apostle Jackposted 8 years ago

    What you do in life that make you feel Good about yourself will cause you to love yourself.But God is also within ourselves finding Him therein would be a greater love that you will have for yourself for doing so.

  4. CoCoV profile image60
    CoCoVposted 8 years ago

    I've found that surrounding yourself with positive people and good friends is a big help. But to start off, you can not think that you're self worthless.  We all have a purpose here, and for whatever reason it is, it should be good enough for you to know that you deserve happiness, self respect and confidence! Trust me when I say that we ALL are self conscious about something.

  5. profile image0
    PWalker281posted 8 years ago

    Hi Dim Flaxenwick, yes, you can learn to love yourself.  Your self-description sounds a bit like the one I gave myself for many years (I'm also a bit of an aging hippy :-)).  I grew up shy, without a sense of who I was, always putting other people's needs before my own and believing they knew better than me. 

    What did I do?  After years of being a doormat, I finally decided that I'd had enough.  I don't believe this shyness and self-loathing  were aspects of my "natural" personality.  I think a lot of it is learned behavior, especially for women who have been enculturated (i.e., taught by social institutions) to put other people's needs before our own and to believe that other people (i.e., men) know better than we do.  These views have been changing over the last 50 or so years, but we were born in a generation when they were a lot more entrenched than they are now. 

    So, for me, it was simply a matter of deciding that I was going to give myself permission to learn how to love and appreciate myself, regardless of any perceived faults or imperfections.  And yes, there was a spiritual component to it as well.  I had some notion that there was "something" greater than me that I was a part of that loved me unconditionally, and it has helped me love myself unconditionally as well.  When I start feeling like I'm not being perfect enough for some reason, I tell myself, "You're doing the best you know how given what you know right now.  And that's good enough for me."

    So if you can learn to hate yourself, you can also learn to love yourself.  It's just a matter of deciding that you are "worth it."

  6. toknowinfo profile image85
    toknowinfoposted 8 years ago

    Every day take a few minutes to pay yourself 10 compliments. There are things about you that make you special and valuable and it is good to make a note of them to yourself.  Relying on others to learn to love yourself makes you vulnerable to them being able to give it and take it away.  To know the value of a piece of art, you have to be an expert.  To the rest of us, we can't appreciate what makes that art valuable.  You are an expert about you.  No one truly knows all the things you have had to do to be you! So take the expertise about yourself and love all that you are, flaws and all, because nature made nothing perfect. And you are a wonderful part of nature. Hope this helps you. and feel free to contact me if you need.

  7. easylearningweb profile image92
    easylearningwebposted 8 years ago

    Yes, I believe anyone can learn to love themselves. I think it starts by first believing in yourself and recognizing your positive traits. If you're not sure what you best it, it's time to discover and try new things. The more you try, the more you will discover what you're best at. Happiness is doing what you love, so once you discover your niche, you will radiate happiness.  Other people will recognize this too. I agree with CoCoV's comment that it's important to surround yourself with positive people. Buy "The Secret" book or DVD, which is excellent reading and learning about the law of positive attraction.

    Finally, know that all things are possible, by having faith, love in others and loving yourself.


  8. KnowledgeSpeaks profile image61
    KnowledgeSpeaksposted 8 years ago

    By loving that part of yourself that is in everyone else. None of us is perfect and all of us need forgiveness, mostly from ourselves. Don't know who you are, but I do know, with 100% certainty, that you are not worthless.


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