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I have been with my husband for 24 years. He has health issues and needs a new h

  1. profile image49
    meanoneposted 7 years ago

    I have been with my husband for 24 years. He has health issues and needs a new heart which this...

    causes impotence. I am too young to not have intimate sex with him. I know that marriage is for better or worse. and this is the worse. i need to know if it is wrong for me to want to find a friend. i love my husband and i want him to love me and do things with me. im lonely and sad because i miss my husband and all the things we used to do even without the sex. please help me.

  2. profile image0
    Butch Newsposted 7 years ago

    There is no easy fix for you.  You have to decide to have an affair and not tell your husband, have an affair and tell him, or not have sex.

    In the best situation you would talk to your husband and tell him you needed to find a sexual partner and he would agree.  But those things don't usually work out that way.

    Finding another sexual partner will not necessarily be easy either.  It's really a tough call.  But it's your life too and you should just follow your heart.  It is society's rules you seem to want to follow, but it's your life.  You will have to decide.

  3. patriciataylor profile image56
    patriciataylorposted 7 years ago

    This is definitely a tough situation.  As Butch News says the ideal situation would be to talk to your husband about it and see if you can come to some sort of agreement.  Conversely, you could just focus your energy on him for now and see where the path leads you.

    Best of luck!

  4. Dr. Wendy profile image67
    Dr. Wendyposted 7 years ago

    I think you and your husband need to talk, no matter how uncomfortable it might be at first.  You might find that he is worried about giving up this part of your marriage too... and maybe with enough communication, you won't have to.  It is possible that he could be emotionally satisfied with satisfying you physically.  He might still enjoy some physical touches, even if he can't bring them to completion.  Help him heal as best as he can.  Fix him healthy meals so his body can become as strong as possible.  Maybe things won't be as bad as you think, and maybe after he gets a new heart he will find he is able to do more than he currently is able to.