Should I ask him why he hasn't called me?

1. 51

   Erika29posted 14 years ago

   Should I ask him why he hasn't called me?
   
   It's been 2 months that I have been dating this man. He is divorced and has a 13 and 10 yr old. He is busy with work traveling. We live about 60 miles apart so because of the reasons stated above we don't see each other too frequently.  Also, I work and go to grad school twice a week (night). We make plans to see each other when he doesn't have the kids and I work around his schedule to make things easier. Last week he went to Utah for work. He didn't call, but text one time to say he was very busy. I got used to him calling every night to say good night. Should I call & ask why he hasn't call

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2. 61

   Shelby Alynposted 14 years ago

   I would say give it a couple of days, then ask. Men don't normally like being asked why he hasn't called, he was probably just extremely busy with work.
   Just give it a bit more time, and next time the two of you talk bring it up in conversation. Don't be too overbearing about it either, because that too could scare him away.
   Good luck with the situation!

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3. 60

   duffsmomposted 14 years ago

   I think the writing is on the wall so-to-speak.  If you are genuinely worried about his welfare, text him, or email to be sure he is all right, then move on.  If he contacts you or calls again, then you can ask why so long between calls.

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4. 38

   dianne143posted 14 years ago

   Yes, you have to do that and same time  both of you should talk the real score between you and him. Busy schedule would always be there in our life, if you are in a relationship you have to balance your career and love life to have healthy relationship. Communication is important no matter what. By the way in a relationship it  should be give and take. God bless you

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5. 60

   JayDee Sterlingposted 14 years ago

   Don't call him to ask him why he didn't call.  That's like having a meeting to discuss having a meeting. Or taking a vote to decide if you should vote.
   
   If you are going to call him, then just call him. Although I don't recommend it.  Everyone is busy, so what, we make time for things that are important to us.  It takes less time to dial the phone, especially when the number is on speed dial, than it does to send a text. Honestly who cares about him sending you a text that he is busy, if he was sending a text, it should have been much more personal than that.
   
   If he started this call to say goodnight business, then he has to continue doing it until he tells you point blank he can't do it anymore.  It is a phone call to say goodnight, he isn't calling with instructions on how to conduct open-heart surgery.
   
   Stop working around his schedule, you have a schedule as well, you work together around each others schedules.  And if that can't happen, well then you need to be busier than you are.  Best wishes

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6. 59

   MariRiposted 14 years ago

   Don't ask why he hasnt called, he might have a lot going on you know: kids, ex wife, work  and his life... a lot right?
   plus guys dont like that.
   this is also a fresh relationship; also divorced men are more complicated than regular ones (i know).
   give him time and space and he"ll come around. dont contact him for like a week, if you cant wait that long send him one! friendly text.
   and honey you sound young, go out with girls and have fun, live your normal life. if he is really interested he'll contact you, if not at least you didnt waste your time waiting...
   go out! your beautiful and deserve someone who gives you all the time you want!

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7. 65

   ThunderKeysposted 14 years ago

   I think its very important to communicate your core-relationship needs, because the relationship science proves that you break-up if they aren't expressed effectively and met mutually. It's just a matter of time.
   
   Sound's to me that what you're experiencing here is an unmet attachment need, one of the most profound and healthy needs that a relationship is built upon. Expressing your underling need for connection, may enable you to negotiate a strategy for meeting your need in a way that cooperates with his busy schedule. That would give him an oppertunity to show he really cares in a way that allows him to meet his other commitments as well.

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8. 0

   reeltaulkposted 13 years ago

   Although this may seem one way (which may be obvious to all) people have a tendency of thinking (in their own head of course) that their actions should set off whatever action from you.  Maybe he does want you to call and ask why he didn't call.  Ugh!!! writing this is even more sad than the situation at hand but if this is or isn't so you don't want to entertain or know someone like this.  It's always going to be a drain game to keep up with or understand them.  Entertain people who communicate in a "normal" way.  It may be hard to accept someone that says what they mean and mean what they say, but in the end there will be know discrepancies or "misunderstandings"

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9. 74

   moonfairyposted 13 years ago

   I wouldn't call, I would just leave it alone. When you chase people they tend to run. Just turn the situation around and maybe you'll understand it better. If you don't call someone, what would be the reason???

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