What is the most effective way you have found to end an argument with your signi

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   OutsideTheLinesposted 13 years ago

   What is the most effective way you have found to end an argument with your significant other?
   
   Aftermthose long tedious disagreement how have you ended the argument?
   What is the best way you've found to end a disagreement before they escalate?

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   ubanichijiokeposted 13 years ago

   Just keep silent and feign uninterested. That really works or try ignoring the person in question. That works too. Thanks

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   hair benderposted 13 years ago

   I have found that if you can sit down quietly and ask your spouse exactly what is wrong and try to put yourself into their feelings works.  Also, don't get the idea that only you are right and that your spouse is automatically wrong.

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4. 58

   HattieMattieMaeposted 13 years ago

   Choosing your battles wisely is a good start. I have never had many arguments with my ex's or the present relationship now for this reason. Is it so important to pick out every little detail of another person. I concentrate on their positive sides, and the good things they have to offer in life. There is no perfect person, so if you wanted too, you could stand there all day arguing and pulling someone apart.  If that is your focus anyway.
   
   If you are arguing over important things like money, shelter, food, bills, clothing and the necessities of life I can understand the importance of standing your ground. But perhaps the way you communicate in a positive or negative manner really effects the outcome. You don't need to  yell, threaten, be little others to get your point across. But this is mainstream in our society we think we have to use force and be negative. It depends on your foundation you layed from the start as well. If you are both good communicators, open and honest, you will listen to each other and feel safe discussing things.
   
   But if you choose the other path, you will be arguing all day to prove whose right and whose wrong.
   
   You have to accept your differences and understand no matter how much you would like to change another person, you can't do it, nor fix them. Instead of focusing on what they are not doing, ask yourself what are you doing wrong. It's easy to say the other person is, but they are just a mirror of yourself. There is something to change about how you're percieving the moment, and you're belief system. You really have to step out of the box, and put yourself in their shoes.
   
   Although we would like to judge others for what they are not doing, what is it that your doing? lol It all comes down to looking at yourself, and being a good rolemodel yourself in the realtionship. If you expect them to do all the changing, I'm sorry to tell you, it will never work, and you will keep arguing to the point there is no relationship left. Now the question is, how important is the relationship? How much time and effort are you going to invest in yourself and your part, and allow them to work on themselves?

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   mandypooleposted 13 years ago

   If tension rises, the best thing to do is to have a hug. It's very hard to stay angry at someone when you are being held lovingly.

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   Jared Zane Kessieposted 13 years ago

   For me I have laid the guidelines to my wife that when I say I can't talk about it anymore, it means I am too mad and nothing will get solved. So laying the guidelines before the fight have helped.
   
   The extra time allows me to cool off to a point of being able to discuss it. If I am still upset I have always followed the counsel of my late uncle who said we need to serve those that we are upset at. If still angry I will usually do some type of service for my wife. It is difficult for me to stay angry when I am serving her, as well as for her to stay angry when I am doing something nice for her. Most of the time its cleaning or doing the dishes.

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   oopsydoopsygirlposted 13 years ago

   My husband and I talk about our problems, what is bothering us (yes, we argue) but we have an agreement...we agree to disagree. We listen to both sides and if we can't come to an agreement, we at least have an understanding of where one another is coming from.

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