because we do not put enough effort into keeping it alive.It is easy to get bored since all it requires is a hyperactive imagination which leads you to think that the grass on the other side is greener combined with plain laziness into making it work and once you start telling yourself," i am bored i am bored"it is easy to think of justifications how it is not your fault and this would further lead to chasing mirages.
not to state that genuine parting of ways is not correct or existing but mostly it is lack of effort that causes one to lose a relationship that has the potential to make life heaven.
"Monogamy becomes boring when couples become lazy"
Whether we want to admit it or not most of us look forward to getting to a place or time where we can "relax" and "take things for granted".
We can’t wait for the “probation period” to end at a new job. There is an element of stress that comes with trying to hold onto something. We look forward to a time where we don’t have to put in our best efforts to “maintain our position”. Some people see this as the time where you don't have to "worry" about what you "say" or how you "act" because their mate is not going anywhere. In their mind "love and commitment" means "forever" regardless of what happens.
In reality there is no such place or time! Marriage like a job is an "at will" contract. (Being in a committed relationship does not mean you can stop being good to your mate and they won't go anywhere.)
No one is "stuck" with anyone. You have to keep "impressing" someone to keep them. Competition never really goes away. A garden must be nurtured to remain alive.
I think the first thing that can happen is children. They take up all of our time and it is easy to let the "couples" aspect of marriage slide. It takes a lot of discipline to stay awake once the kids are down to have a conversation when all you want to do is sleep.
It is a lot of work to remain interested and together. It is easy to grow apart and not really notice it happening until it is a huge chasm in the marriage.
I believe monotony(staleness) in marriage happens in every marriage.Not just marriage- in all kind of relationships as well. -boyfriends-girlfriends- partners.Just the mere fact that "TOO CLOSE FOR COMFORT" with no privacy left is a reality in all marriages is a factor that contributes to the staleness of the marriage .It is not always as rosy as a lot of people tend to believe.You have to weigh the pros and the cons when contemplating divorce or separation .Personally, I believe marriage going stale and monotonous is not a reason to divorce because chances are, the next marriage or relationship will eventually become monotonous as well. So , how do you prevent this? I suggest going on "alone times "only for yourself.This is a luxury you can afford if there are no small children to take care of.
by adu sina3 years ago
Is divorce a best solution for marriage that is not working?all I know about marriage is for better for worse; I don't know why people try to escape the worse via divorce.
by richtwf21 months ago
With an increasing number of married couples ending in divorce - Do you think that divorce is a too easy way out and that a couple should work harder to make their relationship work?No marriage is perfect and couples...
by Elena3 months ago
If a person has divorced 3 times, would you conclude that the person has an underlying problem?
by dashingscorpio5 months ago
Is sexual incompatibility a valid reason for ending a marriage?Assuming everything else in the marriage is going fine and the kids are happy.I’m incline to believe most people would opt to cheat rather than go through...
by daug chibuye3 years ago
Why is it forbidden to have sex with your boyfriend or girlfriend??
by Jewels294012 days ago
I know that getting married young was probably the first sign that marriage was maybe a bad idea, but a marriage isn't going to work when only one person is putting forth an effort to make it work. I was 22 when I got...
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