How do you re-establish lines of communication?
In a relationship, how do you get communication started again, properly, if it was bad to begin with? If it has affected the relationship itself because of poor communication, how do you turn it around to make things better?
You simply communicate what you would like and see if that person wants the same things you do. If not, and you still desire a relationship (business or romance) you can continue to try. It won't always succeed, but at least you will know.
You try and let the person know how it affect you and how you feel about them ,But you do it in a polite or nice way and if the person truly love you even acting like they might not want to hear what you are saying they will try to make it better..!
Hello there Well we need to analyse the mistakes and dig deeper into our mind to see what exactly went wrong in the first place and why. An aggressive speaker only hears and not really listens to what the other has to say. Most of the times they only hear to reply or fight back or to simply win an argument. Now if the person at the receiving end is sensitive he may clam shut. There are people who take a lot of time to open up to someone, but when they do, they want support, love and trust. They fear getting hurt and being let down tremendously. Or worse ! They might feel exposed and insecure and step up their defense mechanism by building a wall around themselves.Its a very sensitive issue and I would act very slowly and steadily,one careful step at a time. I would pretend I have a problem and ask them for help or opinion. So that they feel that now I am in a vulnerable position and they are no more that insecure regarding the relationship. Or I might just talk about something which is not threatening but interesting and casual to both of us.The key here is to gain trust, understand and be a good, patient listener. I hope that helps
crayon, so how do you gain their trust? What if the other person is doing a no contact because they don't trust?
Invite feedback and questions. Accept responsibility for any wrongs you may have done. Listen...with both ears and actually hear the person. Accept that feelings might interfere and do your best to acknowledge and validate them.
re-establishing can be tricky. if neither of the parties think they were 'at fault' then one of them will need to be willing to risk making the overture first.
a huge rift existed in my family for years between myself and another family member. after way too many years, and way too many people had left the planet, one of us, and honestly i do not recall which one of us it was, wrote a letter to the other which resulted in a letter back from the other. and gradually the 'lines' reopened. it took several years for the wounds to really heal but they did and we are very close and have been for about twelve years now.
so it can be done....
my first response to your question was.....VERY CAREFULLY ...and i still feel that way...
There is often something no one wants to be the first to say. Just go ahead and say it, get it done so things can move on - for better or worse. My husband didn't speak to me for five months because he didn't want to say he had changed his mind about being married. That was an awful five months in my life that didn't need to be completely miserable if he had just communicated instead of being silent.
keep in touch, make the first move.. be friend to them via fb or any social networking site in the net..know their number if you can but social networking is the easy way..
The answer to your question about reopening lines of communication got a lot to do with the status of the relationship. Most often lines of communication should not be reopened if the relationship ended badly and should not be re-established. Usually it is one person trying to cling on while the other moves on. A better case scenario is to move on just as the other person has and accept that the relationship has ended without making new attempts to establish communication.
I have gone straight to people and told them I was sorry we didn't understand each other and made it clear that I wanted a healthy relationship with them. It worked with some...and others I guess just didn't really like the relationship or the character. I know that with in laws, family, work relations, it is often necessary and I am not shy or to proud to go the extra mile to make things healthy, but if the person shows that they really don't want any of it, I leave them alone and make peace with it.
There's a West African say and song that says : "Mogho te dya be ye" "You can not be liked by every body or every body can not like you".
Check the song is beautiful and meaningful for the singer:
this is a new dance version!!! Enjoy
If the communication was bad to begin with, chances are it will happen again given the opportunity. History has a funny way of repeating itself in relationships, and sometimes it's just not meant to be.
In saying that, if a guy wanted to re-establish the lines of communication with me, he just needs to pick the right time (ie: Not during office hours) and call me to talk to me about it. And if what he says shows me he is genuine and it's not a spare of the moment thing, he's really thought things through, then I would be likely to listen to him... And that's the first step.
If he was fairly sure I wouldn't want to speak to him, he could also write in a card or send a letter. I would be less likely to reply (Or pay much attention at all) to his contact if he sent me messages about it via SMS or even a email. I would likely be quick to hit the delete button and not bother with it. I would probably not appreciate flowers (Because I like to receive them in happy moments, not when there's problems involved). BUT when someone shows they are making a genuine effort to re-establish contact I'd be respectful enough to listen to what they have to say.
Hope this helps!
First impression is the last impression is an age old saying and stands true in most cases.
But the hope must remain alive give it a chance with open heart keeping ego aside for some time it may work.
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