What are the warning signs of emotionally abusive or manipulative people?
Are there any warning signs before the beginning of a relationship that could indicate that a person is emotionally manipulative or abusive?
Well the first thing is, in order to recognize it, you have to have some portion of that characteristic yourself. (Experience taught me that, taught me a lot about myself.)
Manipulative people twist their words to make it seem like they're the victim and you're the one at fault, no matter if you did anything wrong or not. They (I really should say we) tend to blame our defects of character for their (our) inappropriate actions.
It is very easy. criticism takes place at every moment whether it is right or wrong. showing displeasure on dining table and in bed room. always giving short cut answers and pointing /commenting abusively on your physical look and comparing with other woman. always remains suspicious and searches cause to taunt /hurt the partner. these can be resolved at the beginning stage with open /healthy discussion, keep in mind that the argument may be unhealthy, yet one of the partner must with draw to keep home pleasurable.
You aren't likely to learn much at the "beginning" in most relationships. Our society teaches us to "put our best foot forward" or "bend over backwards to impress" those we are attracted to initially in hopes of winning them over. Your first clue may come when you witness how that person handles disappointment, stress, or someone simply cutting them off while driving. If they go over the top with their anger, hitting the walls, cursing excessively, slamming doors, or even shutting down... Don't ignore it just because it's not you they are upset with (this time). Eventually (your time) will come when you are at the center of the storm. The mistake a lot of folks make is they believe the person may treat everyone else like crap but will always be kind and considerate towards them.
Yes, I definitely believe there are some but they can sneak by you if you're not prepared. I've noticed that sometimes it starts when someone seems to be controlling and overly attached. When you're not around them constantly, they become angry and upset. When this occurs, it's important to either correct it immediately or simply walk away. By feeding into the behavior it only lets the other person know they can get away with it. Worse, the person becomes even more attached. By the time you are ready to walk away, the situation can turn very uncomfortable, even dangerous. Unfortunately, many people (like myself) don't prepare themselves for this kind of relationship until they've been hurt multiple times. I know the feeling.
Abusive or manipulative people always use the word "me" a lot. For example, "Why do you always do this to me?"
Many times these types of people think their partner is cheating... even when they're not. They are sort of paranoid. They make up things and say them just to see if they're true. They may not hit you but their yelling and cursing is much worse than physical pain anyways.
They always are sorry and will buy you things to "start over" and so you wil "stop causing the relationship problems".
They keep a very close eye on you, even when you are at work. They may even put a GPS on your car. I know I've had this done to me!
They will accuse you of doing something if you are 1 minute late getting home. And throw the biggest fit ever...then apologize for "you" bringing that out in them! But they say it's because they love you so much that they don';t want to lose you...but they push you away with all the nonsense!
Insecure, immature people with a low selfesteem, who like to blame others for their own misadvantages. They cling to people and feed on their love but are not prepared to give one in return. Remind me of a mistletoe, a parasite - beautifuly green plant who climb up the other strong plant and take all its nutritions to grow and strive, while the strong plant slowly but surely loosing its strength...until there is nothing left...
WHEN THAT INSTINCT TELLS YOU THE OTHER PERSON IS 'BAD BUSINESS' TRUST IT! SIGNS:
1- most of the times you do what he/she likes
2- he/she is always getting you to do things for him/her
3- when you speak your refuse to do something or go somewhere the other person prefers, he/she starts the guilt trip on you and you don't even realise it.
4- slowly but surely he/she strays you away from the people who really love you
5- points out all the negative traits of your best friend, because she/he influences you and wants them out of the picture
6- sweet talk in order to ask a favour
7- remembers only what suits him/her
8- after a while behaves as an outright bully
9- when he/she keeps nagging for a favour in a variety of ways because they know you'll give in.
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