No. I'll do it myself before trying to manipulate others to do something.
No. Manipulative and controlling behavior is often a sign that the person guilty of that behavior has a personality disorder. Even if the person's behavior isn't extreme enough to fall into the "personality disorder" category, manipulative behavior is a sign of poor interpersonal skills, lack of character, and/or any number of other undesirable traits in a human being.
People who engage in manipulative behavior don't have healthy relationships, don't make good friends, and usually end up not having any genuine, long-term, friends. They're not likable. They're seen as "sneaky" and under-handed. Even if they manage to get someone to do whatever it is they want, that person usually won't stay around for too long.
One way or another (and whether it's with family, friends, co-workers, or anyone else), people who use manipulative behavior end up being losers (and lots of times, they never even figure out why).
nope, because that's naughty.
ok, maybe to a few people
In all honesty i dont like to but when it comes down to it i have caught myself a couple times. i do when i have to.
I strongly disagree with Lisa HW. Manipulative and controlling behaviour is not a sign of a personality disorder. Manipulative people are not losers.
First and foremost manipulators are children, they learn how to use "their" power to get what they want. They are excellent judge of character and they will adjust their behaviour according to the person they deal with. Mom, Dad, grandpa, grandma - all people are different and the child knows "how to play each character". It only shows how clever, observant, adaptive children are. They don't yet have the advantage of brute force and power. Like women, they use their weaknesses to their advantage. Children manipulate using instinct and intelligence, the best tools.
Politicians? Do they all have personality disorders? I don't think so. That is the height of manipulative behaviour. Do they get what they want?
Advertising? You have been "manipulated" into buying "Gucci" or "Guess" or God knows what. Do advertisers all have personality disorders?
It is simply human nature to manipulate and, yes, we all do it. Consciously or subconsciously.
"The feeling of having no power over people and events is generally unbearable to us - when we feel helpless we feel miserable. No one want less power; everyone wants more. In the world today, however, it is dangerous to seem to be power hungry, to be overt with power moves. We have to seem fair and decent. So we need to be subtle - congenial yet cunning, democratic, yet devious.
Everything must appear civilized, decent, democratic, and fair. But if we play by those rules too strictly, if we take them too literally, we are crushed by those around us who are not so foolish. As the great Renaissance diplomat and courtier Niccolo Machiavelli wrote, "Any man who tries to be good all the time is bound to come to ruin among the great number who are not good."
[..] The game is still the same." Robert Greene "48 Laws of Power"
Are manipulative people likable? You bet. How about the special category of manipulative people - charismatic leaders? Pick your favourite person who has a lot of charisma and think how manipulative that person is (was). Knowing people is the toughest subject. Psychology and sociology still do not have all the answers. I doubt that the science will ever succeed in dissecting human nature completely...
I don't like manipulative people, nor do I manipulate people because it's not going to make them do what I want in the first place. It's like putting on this facade but not being true to yourself and to the other person.
There was a time in my life when I did attempt to manipulate people into doing what I wanted them to do. Now I know that was not only deceitful, it was the reason for my feelings of guilt when all was said and done. Now, I will present my strongest reasons for doing it my way, if they agree with me, good. If they fail to understand the situation from the perspective I'm attempting to share, so be it! I sleep better now.
I'm focused into manipulating myself to get what I want, being a chronic procrastinator with motivation issues can make getting anything done.
Ironically, I love to stay busy and be productive, I just can't get myself to focus on any one particular task when I need to.
As far as manipulating other people: no, no and no. Learned that lesson in high school, it's just a cheap form of dishonesty and cowardice. If you need something that you can't do, ask for it directly and be willing to negotiate.
Never! I figure if I have to resort to manipulation or trickery, I risk the possibility of it not being done properly.
No I do my best into not manipulating people into doing what I want. I am a mere mortal. God is the almighty. I leaving people and power to god rather than beliveing that people are there for me to get what I want out of them.
Not at all! I try to do unto others what I would like be done unto me. I just love to be treated with respect, therefore I am going to treat others with the utmost respect - no manipulation!
Only when I need them to do something for me, or when I need something from them...
Yes, when I can......................................................................
I don't believe in manipulating folks for any reason. I believe the Lord has given me feet and hands so I can do what I need to do without having to beg from others.
In this article you can read about the not-too-subtle marketing tricks that shops play on us to make us buy more stuff and spend more money in their venues. This is Part I. read more
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