Are you a jealous spouse?

1. 64

   Jynzlyposted 11 years ago

   Are you a jealous spouse?
   
   I am a jealous wife (shame on me and not that I like it) and I know why. Are you?

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2. 80

   dghbrhposted 11 years ago

   I am not a jealous wife. To be honest earlier i was heck of a jealous wife and even i know the reason why it was so :-)
   But one fine day i realized that jealousy only can ruin my inner side rather then making any change that is so much wanted in the counterpart. Then it may result into some unnecessary frictions. So i thought better of it and it was much easier to change me then expectations LOL.
   So now i am a complete changed personality to even surprise everybody around me. Try it out and lemme tell you its much fruitful and satisfying then being jealous.
   Best wishes
   Thanks you for this question:-0

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   1. 64

      Jynzlyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Yes, we all can always choose to change and can really change if we want to. Thanks for sharing.

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3. 64

   biznaposted 11 years ago

   It all depends on what you mean by jelousy. Mine is not directly jelousy but i think it's the concern of the future of my family. I can only protect my family's future if my husband does the same. If he goes running after girls out there what happens next? There is so much to fear.

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   1. 64

      Jynzlyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      You're right, meaning of jealousy is unique to an individual. My meaning of jealousy roots in my experience of having a womanizer ex-husband. I can only have a clean and sincere married life otherwise I'd rather be single and peaceful.

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   2. 81

      dashingscorpioposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Therefore your "jealousy" stems from a lack of trust in your husband to uphold his vows. Clearly if you don't trust someone it's wise not to become emotionally invested in them. Jynzly, an ex is not an ex if you project him onto your current mate.

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4. 81

   dashingscorpioposted 11 years ago

   No I'm not a jealous spouse.
   Jealousy to me generally occurs when someone feels like they love their mate more than their mate loves them.
   This makes them want to keep a close eye on them because they don't trust them. If I don't trust someone I'm not going to be with them. Life is too short!
   In other instances jealousy is used to fend off the "competition" by trying to control the personality of their mate. I've known guys to fly off the handle if their women smiled or were kind towards any man other than them. They expected them to walk around looking angry ready to level rude insults at anyone who says, "Hello" to them.
   If you have to "second guess" your every move or change your (core) being in order to keep someone happy then you are with the wrong person. One man's opinion! :-)

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   1. 64

      Jynzlyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Possibly. There is a kind of righteous jealousy mentioned in Songs of Solomon 8:6. That is the type of jealousy I got; not the insecure or stupid sort. I am completely assured of my husband's love, jealousy has a meaning unique to an individual.

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   2. 81

      dashingscorpioposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      If you have no (fear) of losing your husband and no fear of him betraying you then why be jealous? The only other form of jealousy I can think of is actually "envy" which makes no sense since he (belongs) to you. What is an example of your jealousy?

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   3. 64

      Jynzlyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Jealousy is as natural as love; people are scared to admit it in them because they want to project a wholesome personality when deep in them are suppressed true feelings . I have a hub on this to answer your question.

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5. 46

   Ericdierkerposted 11 years ago

   Yes yes yes! And every night she comes home to me. Wow I must be something special.

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   1. 64

      Jynzlyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      That's a more realistic and brave statement. Keep it up.

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6. 63

   Globetrekkermelposted 11 years ago

   No,i am not .I have no reason to be jealous.My husband's personality does not fit the category of a womanizing guy. I've been married to him for 28 years  and  I never had any suspicion of infidelity. I am a woman and Women basically have a pretty good sense when infidelity is an issue. I never experienced that with my husband. Even if he had been attracted to someone else and got involved just more than friendship , i would not know my reaction if  it ever got to that point .i probably will let him do what he wishes.but you never know what  the future holds.i don't even know if i will be jealous  or not.after all, i cannot stop him if he wants to have an affair or not. Men get bored and so are women.it's not that they don't love you.they need a diversion sometimes.you as the wife will just have to accept that.

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   1. 81

      dashingscorpioposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      "you as the wife will just have to accept that."? No one is stuck with anyone! If someone is unhappy with their spouse they always have the (option) to leave! Acceptance is just (one choice). We're all entitled to have our own "deal breakers"

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   2. 64

      Jynzlyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      We can always speak of what is right in the general sense but in the end the decision is still personal level. What applies to you does not necessarily applies to all. In my case I am assertive in every detail in my marriage relationship.

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   3. 63

      Globetrekkermelposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Luckily, i doubt if i will have the opportunity to be jealous with  my husband  as he is not that kind of a man . I know, been married to him him long time. I feel blessed that my  marriage with him is healthy overall. Can't complain much.

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   4. 64

      Jynzlyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      It is always situational. Your being married for a long time has made you well-adjusted to each other. My husband and I had just been married for less than two years and we are apart all this time.

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   5. 63

      Globetrekkermelposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Jynzlly, you're right. The longevity of the marriage has a bearing to the success or breakdown of a marriage.no marriage is ever perfect but  there is always the possibility of a happy one.Cheers on that one, lol! I'll take the latter.

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   6. 64

      Jynzlyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Cheers Globe...

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   7. 63

      Globetrekkermelposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      I have seen women stuck with their marriages even with big infidelity issues for different reasons -the children are one big reason like Jynzly said.i don't think men and women are programmed to be monogamous if you look at marriage statistics.

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7. 77

   Paul Maplesdenposted 11 years ago

   No, I'm not jealous at all. My wife has her own interests, friends and pastimes and we share time together when we both want to. I think that a lot of it comes down to trust and having the other person's best interests at heart.

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   1. 64

      Jynzlyposted 11 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks for sharing.

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8. 71

   Seek-n-Findposted 11 years ago

   In the way the word is typically understood, no, I'm not.  I trust my husband completely.  One of the reasons for this is because we have chosen commitment to be the foundation of our love.  We choose each other, whether we "feel like it" or not.  We are both people of our word, so we rely on commitment especially when the difficult feelings and frustrations threaten to lead us elsewhere.  We both have our minds made up--and this is the crux of the battle.  We are not 99.99 percent committed--we are 100 percent committed.  No matter who or what comes along, the power rests in us to respond from a place of where our minds are already made up.  When the mind is decisive, the rest of the life will follow.  An area where our stubbornness works to our advantage. 
   
   The "yes" part of my answer is related to time--I become jealous of what gets his time if we don't have enough quality time together.  Quality time is my number one love language so this is where "jealousy" is possible.

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