How can you get over your ex when you still have feelings for them?
Especially when they won't leave you alone but their bad behavior never improves.
Sometimes I feel that if you truly care about someone deeply enough to try to make a long term relationship work, your feelings never go away for that person. When you spend so much time and energy on something, that energy still exists within us, and it is difficult to put it toward something else when the relationship fails or both parties decide it is best to move on from each other. Moving on is extremely difficult in some cases and one must first grieve it as a loss, and then you may be able to move on to better days. Take as much time as you need to grieve the loss, but do not dwell on the past, try to remember why the relationship didn't work and put some extra energy into the things that make you happy such as a hobby. Eventually you will be able to move on and find happiness with someone else (if that is what you desire). Distance between you and them is a must when you feel the need to move on. If you can not grow separately, you can not grow together, and if you can not grow together, you must try to grow separately.
I don't know if that answers your question, but that is the best answer I can give. This situation is never easy, but with time it will get better.
You probably will always have some feelings for a long-term ex but overtime those fade as you find love with a new person that treats you the way you want to be treated. When this happens you'll look back at all the drama your ex put you through and wonder why you stayed with them for so long.
Unless there is a major reason why you need to stay in contact with your ex such as having children in common, then you shouldn't feel obligated to take his calls, respond to his emails. You get to (choose) who you want to talk to or spend time with. It's possible to block email addresses, have caller ID so you can reject calls. Instead of blaming (him) for not leaving you alone you have to take responsibility for your taking his calls in the first place. It's your life! Take the wheel!
by jessyferari15 years ago
I am going through a difficult time in my relationshipI have chosen to stay with my boyfriend, after what he did to me. I say I forgive him, but deep down I still feel betrayed and will never forget the humilation, but...
by Steven Escareno18 months ago
Unlike my previous forum topics, this does have a lot to do with me. I just broke up with someone that I cared very deeply for. I can't say why I was the one that decided to end things, but I can tell you...
by wifelv16 months ago
My ex had an affair with married women and they are still together after it all began 3yrs ago. Our divorce was final 3 months ago. They are now living together. I keep waiting for them to get back what they gave out,...
by dazt996 years ago
How do I get over an ex that I work with that still isnt over her ex?I dated a girl I fell in love with 2 years ago, we finally got together after 12 months of knowing each other. Prior to this she was seeing a married...
by Georgina Shamon3 years ago
Is it wrong to stop talking to an ex the minute you find out he has met someone new?Personally, the minute I find out that someone who once liked me ..is talking to someone else, then I just decide right then and there...
by ms catatonia3 years ago
Is it ok for your husband to privately email an ex girlfriend and then lie about it?I have had a lot of trust issues with my husband one being that he was privately emailing back and forth many times with his ex...
Copyright © 2018 HubPages Inc. and respective owners.
Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners.
HubPages® is a registered Service Mark of HubPages, Inc.
HubPages and Hubbers (authors) may earn revenue on this page based on affiliate relationships and advertisements with partners including Amazon, Google, and others.