Do YOU believe that human beings are monogamous and committal by nature?

1. 84

   gmwilliamsposted 10 years ago

   Do YOU believe that human beings are monogamous and committal by nature?
   
   

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2. 40

   ChristinSposted 10 years ago

   That's a tough one.  Biologically I'd say no.  Mentally and emotionally many are and many aren't.  I think I personally am. I don't like the idea of being with a lot of people.  I love the stability and friendship my partner provides to me and he is a very loving, awesome person. I have no problem feeling I can be with this one mate for the rest of my life.
   
   That being said, when I was married the first time, I hated being married after a year. We were not compatible, but it had been beat into my brain, that women want to get married and have children - so I thought that was what I was supposed to want and convinced myself it was.  It was a bad fit and I was lonely and miserable. I felt trapped because I wanted to be with someone different.
   
   I think it depends on the person(s) involved and their needs and wants. Some do not want a monogamous relationship for life and that's fine. Others don't and that's fine and natural for them too. Regardless, the two people need to be up front and honest about their needs and expectations. Far too many women try to "trap" men that don't want to be committed to one woman and how can that possibly work?

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   1. 84

      gmwilliamsposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Again, GREAT answer, excellent philosophical input, ChristinS!

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      dashingscorpioposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I agree great answer! Also sometimes people make promises without knowing themselves well enough. No one gets married "planning" divorce. The same is probably true for monogamy. Circumstances have a way of changing people and their goals.

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   JThomp42posted 10 years ago

   I would have to say no. This is where "commitment" comes into play. It is too easy for people to divorce in this country, way too easy. My Grandparents were all still together until they passed away. This in my opinion is the way it should be. Love should overcome our own urges and selfishness.

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      dashingscorpioposted 10 years agoin reply to this

      Actually JT I think it's a lot easier to get married than it is to get divorced in this country. In Las Vegas it's done in a hour. I've yet to meet anyone who thought getting divorced was easier than getting married. Choosing the wrong mate happens.

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      JThomp42posted 10 years agoin reply to this

      I agree dashing. But, in my state; if there are no children involved, it can happen in as little as 60 days. Apparently, many of us have chosen the wrong mate my friend.

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4. 73

   AMFredenburgposted 10 years ago

   I think some are and some aren't; the trick is figuring out who is who. It's a tragedy in the making when someone who is naturally monogamous marries someone with a roving eye. Our culture needs to stop foisting this notion of monogamy as required on people and allow players to be who they are and leave the monogamous types alone.
   
   Of course, people don't always get it right the first time; even monogamous people make mistakes. I've known people who had bad first marriages, then found the love of their lives and stayed happily married for the rest of their lives - sometimes many decades.

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