When faced with a bold faced lie - do you call the liar out or pretend to believe them?
Just curious about how we all handle liars and lying differently.
It really depends on the situation. My experience has been whenever I've called someone out for not being honest, I usually get turned on. So I carefully pick my battles. For example, a woman I knew once was constantly lying. If it was just about herself, I wouldn't have cared so much. The lies were so ridiculous, yet people started believing her. She actually did it to bully someone. So I stepped in and explained why no one was being rational about it and her lies were transparent. People I thought were my friends proved they weren't...until something happened 6 months later and they saw that she really was not being honest. Then the tides turned.
If the lie hurts no one then I may ignore it. My fiance's friend lies about himself with women. Though it annoys me we also think he's a bit crazy so we ignore him when he talks. It's really a big joke.
If the lie hurts someone then I call them out. My niece's baby father once threw rocks at the house one night. She was scared and called me over. When I was leaving the house I saw him hiding in the bushes but he denies having been there that night. My fiance also saw him along with our dog. I called him out on that lie.
It depends on the type of lie. If it is gossip, I will tell them you cannot always believe what you hear, and there are always two sides to every story. If the lie is intended to hurt someone or blemish their character, I will tell them to tread softly, this is someone's feelings you are dealing with. If it is a lie to boast, I will just change the subject.
I call them out on the spot if I know they still have brain cells left. Otherwise it is foolish to argue with a complete fool. I only argue with incomplete fools.
I'm a very honest person and I hate being lied to. If I know I've been lied to, I'm never afraid to call the person out on it. I do, however, try to be a little nice about it, although it really depends on the situation. I'll almost always give them a chance to redeem themselves too, kind of dancing around the fact I know the truth and giving them a chance to tell me before I finally let them know in a more direct faction that, hey, I know you're lying.
It is important to recognize that, in certain situations, people may be lying to you because they know you don't want to hear the truth. It may be because they know you're in denial, that the truth may hurt you, or it's just not their place to tell (like if it's a secret someone else is keeping from you). Sometimes taking a step back to recognize just why this person is lying can help you confront them more peacefully or just let it go. Lying isn't always meant to hurt.
It really depends on where the situation occurs and how much energy you are willing to spend on a liar (whether simply wrong/uninformed about facts or whether they are a lowlife with an agenda). At work, you'd handle it differently than at a party, out in public, or at home. I also find it funny to not call them out verbally and simply show irrefutable proof when applicable and necessary for the lie to be revealed. However, I do understand how it can sometimes be funny to verbally call a liar out in front of other people (oh watch how they squirm). That's more useful in more social settings.
However, if you have issues with confronting people or it just may not be appropriate in a certain setting, silence is a good tactic because often the liars know that you see through them when you say absolutely nothing after they lie. Also, abruptly changing the subject can show them you know they're lying without saying a word about them lying. Even worse they will often talk and talk to explain things with more lies, digging their hole even deeper. Again, it depends on the situation and how much energy you're willing to expend on it. Calling someone out may take too much energy and effort and can be risky in some settings with little likelihood that the offender will stop lying.
Call them out. I don't tolerate talking to a liar in the face. Either tell me the truth, or get out.
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