We have this assumption that people "settle" for less than what they could have. The reality is if someone really (believes) they can have better they will do better. We are always where we (choose) to be.
Cost VS Rewards
If I presented you two cars in a parking lot and told you that you could have either one of them. Car (a) is a 2014 brand new Audi 6 and car (b) is a rusted out 1972 Ford Gremlin, odds are you would choose the new car.
However if I told you that you had to run a marathon in order to get the new car or you could simply take the old car right now; Depending on how you feel about the "cost versus reward" you might choose the old car or even (decide) to go without a car. Either way it would be a (choice) and not "settling". Essentially they don't believe it was worth expending the (effort) to get the new car! If someone decides it's not worth their time and effort it's not so much they "settled" as much as they've decided whatever it is not worth the price.
Whenever someone tells you that they "settled" it's always good to ask them why they (chose) to settle? Odds are when they answer you it will turn out that they really (believed) it was the BEST they could do under the circumstances.
On the other hand when we tell others they are "settling" what we are really doing is imposing (our belief system) on them. It's an uphill battle when we have to "sell them" on the fact that they can do better or deserve better.
Traits such as ambition, desire for change, and determination are not likely to be found in people who don't believe they deserve the best of what life has to offer.
Anyone who is flipping burgers at McDonalds and tells you they could have been a millionaire but "settled" for that job is lying to themselves! "I could have been a manager but I didn't want all that pressure and responsibility." Taking the "easy"way out" is a (choice).
Being where you want to be is not "settling". It's doing what you believe is best for you! If someone decides (it's not worth the cost) to get the "top of the line" and decide to get a lower end product that is a personal choice. Some people are always looking the (least expensive) way to live.
I suppose they might be lonely and afraid that their one true love will never come into their life. Some people are desperately lonely and in those cases, I can see someone might give into settling.
True. What I believe is most people who settle get comfortable with the theory of having someone by their side whether they are good or bad for them. It is like a child in a candy store wanting that candy on the shelves if it is not good for them.
I know of someone who had settled for his he did not marry the one he truly loves but instead the one who will be there serve him. They don't want to wait any longer.
i can be wrong, but to me true love mean sacrifice,people settled because they want love, not to wait for someone but to love someone.
I am hoping that true love really exists, but maybe on the movies. I think thanks to social media now the odds of us finding our true love may be better than not. Recently I met a couple who have been the story hubby and wife from two countries who only lived about 45 minutes from one another but would never have met if not for social media. Let's hope after 18 years they end up happy ever after forever.
by dashingscorpio 2 years ago
Is marrying someone you don't love the ultimate definition of settling?Recently a question was asked on HP: Is it more important for you to marry someone who loves you than to marry someone (you) love? A few folks stated they'd rather be with someone (who loves them) rather than they themselves...
by KevinC9998 7 years ago
Do you think most people are with their true love or just settled?
by Michele42 3 months ago
Why does my dog dig on me when I am settled down?
by DIYweddingplanner 7 years ago
Let's say you're strongly convinced the love of your life has come and gone, but you don't want to be alone forever. Is it ever OK to settle for that reason?
by kandylena 6 years ago
Why have women lowered their standards so much?
by Josh Makaveli 4 years ago
Do we need to first settle down before getting married?what does settling down mean? is it financial settlement like having a permanent job or mental settlement i.e. one needs to be mature enough?
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