How do I stay out of friend-zone after confessing about my feelings.
I was friend-zoned by this girl I love so much. She broke up with her ex and when I told her my feeling she said that she don't feels that way. I left and trying to move on but its so hard and I miss her a lot. I wanna talk to her but don't want to get friend-zoned again. What do I do?
Time is required and you rushed into confessing to her now you got to be friendly and no more. Try to stay away for a while after a break up she needs to be on her own and eventually would figure out her life.
When someone puts you in the "friend zone" essentially what they're saying is you are NOT "the one"! They're not physically attracted to you. If she had thought you were "hot" she never would have put you in the "friend zone". The truth of the matter is it's all in her hands as to whether you remain a friend or become her lover.
The best you can do is stop acting like a "friend" and behave more like the guys she (is) attracted to. Stop hanging on her every word or looking at her with puppy dog eyes. In fact your stock increases when she sees you are dating other women and having FUN. I'm not talking about faking it I mean really get out there and start occupying your time with other women.
Keep the friendship very casual with no deep heart to heart conversations and refuse to be a shoulder for her to cry on. If you (act) like a "best friend" you will be treated like a "best friend" so avoid oversharing things going on in your personal life and when she attempts to share with you cut her off without being too rude but let her know you have somewhere else to be. Give her a hug and a kiss on the forehead and leave.
There are really only two ways to escape the "friend zone".
1. The most common way it happens is when the woman gets tired of being hurt by the men she normally is attracted to and (decides) to settle down with a guy that worships the ground she walks on even though she does not (feel) the same about him. For her it's a "practical decision" to protect her heart. She may even tell herself that she can (learn) to love the guy.
2. The male friend (becomes) the kind of man she is naturally drawn to. Forget about everything she has told you about the kind of man she claims she "wants" and instead focus on being the kind of guy she chases after. Rarely are they the same. Most women are initially attracted to men of mystery. They want to earn your attention. Their being uncertain how you feel about them makes you interesting and a challenge.
I've often said if you stick a woman in a room with five guys and have four of them get on their knees extending their heart out towards her while the fifth guy sits in a corner sipping a cocktail acting as though she does not exist....etc That will be the guy she wants to get to know!
Its as if they live by that old saying:
"We ignore those who adore us and adore those who ignore us."
Always be the cool confident magnetic mysterious fifth guy in the room! In the future always go for a kiss on the first date. This makes your intentions known. Rejections keep you from wasting time in the "friend zone" hoping for things to change.
My advice would be to stop being friends with her. Even if you somehow managed to become the friends you were before, your feelings won't go away and you'll just repeat this scenario over and over again until someone gets seriously hurt. There is a woman out there who will love you back, and it is a disservice to her (and you) to follow the one who doesn't.
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by Steven Escareno 4 years ago
Okay folks. I'm bored again, and I'm having a bit of writer's block at the moment, so amuse me with your answers on this thread, and I'll gladly read it. Thanks for your time gang. Peace out.
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