What are the signs when your boyfriend doesn't love you anymore?

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  1. syche profile image58
    sycheposted 9 years ago

    What are the signs when your boyfriend doesn't love you anymore?

    He says he loves me. If we fight, he always do something to make it up to me and be forgiven. But after I forgave him, he then wont show some effort just to be with me until I decided to broke up with him. But he dont agree with it, he'll say things that will surely make a girl's heart soft. But again, next day he wont even text me or message me in facebook. I dont know what do. I want to be free from him, but he wont let me. I guess im starting to fall out of love for him. Please, I need suggestions.

  2. dashingscorpio profile image80
    dashingscorpioposted 9 years ago

    There is no "universal way" of expressing love or feeling loved.
    Essentially what we do is seek out someone who naturally expresses love the way (we) want to be loved.
    Just because a person doesn't behave the way we want them to does not mean they don't love us or care about us. There are many women who wish their husbands were more romantic, thoughtful, or helped out more around the house and with the children. And yet if an intruder entered their home these husbands would lay down their lives to protect them.
    Therefore you have to examine this issue in two ways.
    1. Do you sincerely believe he is cheating on you or no longer loves you?
    2. Are you just frustrated over the fact that he doesn't love you (your) way?
    During the "infatuation phase" of most relationships both people are usually "die hard" romantics. They bend over backwards to impress one another, shower each other with attention, and seldom if ever use the word "no" to any suggestion made. Laughter comes easily, cards and gifts are exchanged "just because", snuggling & kissing are the norm, and sex is off the charts!
    We believe we are "the same". We've found "the one"!
    Overtime however each person reverts back to their "authentic self". At this time we start to see our (differences). Arguments and fights breakout when we're not getting what we expected or believe should be "normal" behavior.
    We feel boundaries have been crossed, we've been disrespected, neglected, or taken for granted and essentially they no longer make us feel "special" and so you argue or breakup.
    With each fight or breakup the relationship loses something. You'll know he no longer cares for you when he stops trying to "make up" with you. Eventually a person gets tired of playing the role of always being wrong and needing to "change" in order to please others. They want to be loved for who (they) are.
    You said: "I want to be free from him, but he wont let me."
    No one is "stuck" with anyone! We are always where (we) choose to be! You love it when he comes crawling back to you and making promises he can't or won't keep. If you cut things off don't have anymore communication.
    There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships: We either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have. Stay or move on the choice is up to us!
    You either accept him as he is or find someone who naturally is what you want. Each of us (chooses) our own friends, lovers, and spouse.

    1. syche profile image58
      sycheposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Actually, I already tried to avoid him after I broke up with him. I blocked him on Facebook and I changed my number, but he knows where I live, he'll just go here and act as if nothing happens. He doesn't take the things I say seriously.

    2. dashingscorpio profile image80
      dashingscorpioposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Why should he take you seriously if you take him back. Get out and start dating again! You get to (choose) who you let into your home or spend your time with. You are giving this guy way too much power over your life. No contact means no contact.

    3. syche profile image58
      sycheposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      I really wanted to do it, but I just dont want to commit to another person just to be free from him. I dont think it will be the right idea for me to do.

    4. dashingscorpio profile image80
      dashingscorpioposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Dating is not the same as being in a "relationship". It just means you go out and about with other guys. Having dinner, going to a movie, or concert, and so on. The purpose of dating is learn about others in order to decide if you want to commit.

    5. syche profile image58
      sycheposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      okay, but still, I cant find the right guy to do it with. Maybe I could just be with my friends instead. Its not easy for me to be with a guy alone, except for him.

    6. Barine Sambaris profile image75
      Barine Sambarisposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      You should call him and have a heart to heart discussion with him. Even if you were to get back with him, he has to take you seriously and consider your feelings and fears. He probably means well but doesn't know how to show it, or is only trying to

    7. syche profile image58
      sycheposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      I guess you're right. Talking about it with him would be great. Thanks for the advices. I appreciate it so much!

  3. Old-Empresario profile image69
    Old-Empresarioposted 9 years ago

    Mine is sort of an odd answer given our cultural understanding of love, but there is really no way to show love for someone on a day-to-day basis. One can be considerate and polite, but that isn't the same thing as love. And it sounds like what you want is consideration and politeness from your boyfriend. One can give displays of affection and fondness and one can enjoy someone's company, but these types of things can just as easily be empty gestures no matter how good they make a lady feel emotionally. In short, someone can love you and still get bored from time to time. Some people call this taking one for granted. Whatever you call it, it is a fact of life that happens. Facebook in particular is definitely not the gauge for how much someone loves you. Think of Facebook as a giant forum with 20 million people shouting through megaphones about themselves with no one else listening to what anyone else is saying. Also, sometimes boyfriends and girlfriends are just busy with work or friends and don't have a great deal of time to devote to a relationship. I think you'll find that your complaint is not an uncommon one. But entering into a new relationship with another boyfriend will have positive and negative consequences. A negative consequence will be that after a few months, your new boyfriend will also seem busy all the time and won't give you the attention you expect. In short, 90% of men are all the same. A positive consequence will be that you will come to learn and accept this fact of life the more people you date.

    1. syche profile image58
      sycheposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      I get your point. Im just so confuse about his feelings about me. It seems that he's just taking me for granted. He dont anything that makes him so busy except his' dota. He wont sacrifice his game for me even just for few minutes, he'll make me wait


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