Are you aware, have you minimized your baggage, and firmly know your deal-breakers?
Dr Phil provided advice to find Mr.Right:
Be Aware.Make sure you're aware of the first impression you're giving. People react to how you present yourself.
Check Your Baggage.Seven percent of communication is what you say, and the other 93 percent is non-verbal. If you're carrying baggage — insecurities, fear, desperation — people can tell.
Know Your Deal Breakers.While Dr. Phil cautions about expecting someone to meet a checklist, he does think it's OK to have deal breakers. Be open to someone who may not meet all your requirements, while recognizing what you're not willing to compromise on.
That is some sound practical advice. I agree with it.
Each of us (chooses) our own friends, lovers, and spouse.
If someone keeps having bad relationships they need to stop playing the "blame game" and re-examine their mate selection criteria. They need to become a "better shopper"!
Until a person figures out who (they) are, what they want and need from mate they're likely to allow "impulsive connections" and "happenstance" to dictate their relationship choices.
It's the equivalent of going shopping without a list! Odds are you'll throw anything in your cart as you check out at the register. A lot of people lack self-discipline when it comes to sticking to their own "shopping list"!
Everyone should have their own "mate selection process" which includes their "must have" and "deal breaker" list.
Having said that both lists are likely to change over the years as one gains more experience, maturity, and evolve in their thinking based upon lessons learned, their current needs and circumstances.
One's "ideal mate" at age 18 is rarely the same at ages 26, 36, or beyond. Things that we thought were so important mean less and things we never considered in the past become very important.
Know yourself, Love yourself, & Trust yourself!
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