After commitment, what is the best attributes to a quality relationship?
Does loyalty count more than forgiveness? Any other attributes that make a better relationship?
Initiate showing the love, trust, giving and devotion unconditionally. It is important that these attributes be done unconditionally to prove that they are genuine.
Love is the greatest of all; yet it is indeed that type of unselfish love sometimes referred to as Agape Love.
I believe there are 6 key attributes needed for a lasting commitment. Honesty, Trust, Loyalty, Love & Devotion, Intimacy, and emotional security. Remove one of these and you're in trouble!
Forgiveness means to "let it go" and no longer allow whatever it is to dwell on your mind. It doesn't mean one has to stay in a relationship. That's a personal choice.
A commitment is a pledge or agreement to dedicate one’s efforts to insure a desired result.
Some believe it means once you make a decision you stick with it (no matter what) you learn along the way.
Assume someone asked you to ride with them to watch the sunset and a few miles into the trip you realize the two of you are heading east instead of west. You point this out to your friend but they insist on continuing in the same direction. If the goal is to watch the sunset it makes no sense for you continue riding towards the east with them!
A commitment is only good for as long as both parties agree on a strategy to reach a desired goal. Being committed to someone does not mean you “turn off your brain ”. You are still entitled to have “deal breakers”. In fact if you don’t have them odds are you don’t love yourself or you have low self-esteem. It takes courage to walk away from bad or toxic relationships.
I've heard of people staying in verbal/physical abusive relationships, during infidelity, alcohol/drug addiction, and mismanagement of family finances.
In other instances the couple stopped having sex or don't even sleep in the same room of the house. And yet people on the outside admire them and want to know what their "secret" is for having a lasting marriage.
If someone is willing to be another person's "doormat" and has sworn they'll never walk out (no matter what) their mate does and their mate loves this arrangement then I suppose they'll be together for life!
Communication is the GPS for relationships. It lets you know whether you are "growing together" or "growing apart".
The goal is to be with someone who shares your same values, wants the same things for the relationship, naturally agrees with you on how to obtain those things and last but not least there is a mutual depth of love and desire for one another.
"Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."
- Oscar Wilde
Relationships are living evolving things. New information changes everything.
“Being with no one is better than being with the wrong one.”
Answering the second question first I lean toward forgiveness as the greater when compared to loyalty. I guess one could speculate with logic asking to answer that question with two additional questions seeking a truth for oneself. I tend to lean that there is greater power with forgiving loyalty than there is with loyally forgiving. hmmmmm . . .
Can one forgive loyally?
Can one loyally forgive?
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