Can two men or two women raise a child as a same sex couple?

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  1. Rakim Cheeks profile image59
    Rakim Cheeksposted 9 years ago

    Can two men or two women raise a child as a same sex couple?

  2. jlpark profile image77
    jlparkposted 9 years ago

    Yes. I've even written hubs on it, but I'll answer as fully here as I can.

    Yes they can. Just as a solo mother or father can, a grandparent can, an aunt can, a foster parent can, and a mother/father combination can. They are as qualified to parent as anyone - you learn as you go, children do not come with instruction manuals and everyone who has children has  been a first time parent at some point.

    If you are worried about needing the opposite gender involved with the child than that of their same sexed parents - gay people don't exist in a 'Bubble of Gayness' - we have siblings, uncles, aunties, grandparents, our own parents, friends etc who all have a role and influence in the life's of our children. We don't just hang with our own gender or sexual orientation.

    Some same sex parents have involvement with the other bio parent of any children conceived using one of the parents sperm or egg, so they can be involved in the life's of those children they helped to produce.

    Some, like my wife and myself, don't - though for us it's mutual - he doesn't want to have input, but will be available when our child/ren are 18 and wish to meet him. We know who he is, and are all happy with the arrangement. I have 7 sisters - all straight, all married, strong male figures in our daughter's life including my dad and my stepfather.

    It has been studied and found that teenagers who were raised in same sex parented households fare just as well, if not better than, as their heterosexual raised peers. They often have more empathy, and social awareness due to the stigma still attached to being gay, or associated with someone who is gay.

    Short answer to yr question - yes they can. Just as well as everyone else.

    1. Rakim Cheeks profile image59
      Rakim Cheeksposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Great answer! However, I must ask how do you expect for a child to call both women mother and father, or both men mother and father. I'm curious to know.

    2. Austinstar profile image85
      Austinstarposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Why can't the child call them mama and mom or mother and mommy or something else they agree on. Why do you think one has to be the "mom" and the other has to be the "dad"? They are both moms!

    3. Rakim Cheeks profile image59
      Rakim Cheeksposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      @Austinstar it is Inappropriate. More than likely they're going to grow up thinking dating two women or dating two men is the way to date in life. Not to mention, it's likely to runied a child's mind seeing to individuals of the same sex.

    4. jlpark profile image77
      jlparkposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      I'm Mum, my wife is Mama. Yr last comment is offensive. My daughter will have whatever sexual orientation she was born with. I grew up with str8 people - am gay. It is fine 2 date whom u r attracted 2 is what she will learn. Not hatred of difference

    5. dashingscorpio profile image81
      dashingscorpioposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Rakim, It's nonsense to believe if two women raise a girl she'll become a lesbian & if two men raise a boy he'll become gay.
      If this were true there would be no gays and lesbians.
      Most gay and lesbian people had {heterosexual} parents!

    6. jlpark profile image77
      jlparkposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Exactly Dashing! I have 7 sisters all straight and straight parents. But I'm gay. Sexual orientation of parents has no bearing on sexual orientation of their offspring. It's not a choice, so if my daughter is gay or straight - she'll be accepted.

    7. profile image0
      jonnycomelatelyposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Rakim, please don't go away assuming that you cannot present your point of view.  As you can see that view has been criticized, and you can thus get more knowledge about the subject and hopefully understand it more.  Keep writing, please.

    8. jlpark profile image77
      jlparkposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Thanks Jonny - I didn't mean for him to go away - I was a little annoyed that I took the time to answer his question nicely, and got insulted for my troubles (over that now!). Happy to discuss if Rakim still wants to.

  3. prettynutjob30 profile image85
    prettynutjob30posted 9 years ago

    Yes they can, I believe they are just as capable as anyone else at being a good parent. Being a parent is based on your abilities, to raise a child, not what gender you are. I have met some pretty incredible same sex couples, who are awesome parents, and then I have met a few straight couples, who should have never procreated at all.
    To be a parent all one really has to do is love, and take care of their child, the gender of whoever is raising them, has nothing to do with that.

    1. Austinstar profile image85
      Austinstarposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      I have met many parents that should not have been parents. Children need to grow up with intelligent and caring people, no matter what sex they all are.

  4. profile image53
    peter565posted 9 years ago

    Why not, I don't see how that make them lousy parents.  I mean, personally I think a person must have a loose wire in his/her head to be gay, but I don't see how that is relevant to their parenting skills.  In fact, even some animals make better parents them humans.  You heard a story, about a girl raise by wolfs?  During WW2 there is this Jewish family attack by Nazi's and killed the parent, but the little girl's life was saved by a pack of wild wolfs attacking the Nazis.  The wolf pack then raised the girl as their own, until she was found by allied troops in the end of the war.

    1. profile image0
      jonnycomelatelyposted 9 years agoin reply to this

      Peter565, there is no loose wire in my head I can assure you!  But I have never had/desired sex with a woman, and I am almost 74.  But thanks for supporting equality in principle.

    2. profile image53
      peter565posted 9 years agoin reply to this



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