What would you do when you're in a situation where you meet a guy, then you both

1. 60

   Mtshali Sisiposted 7 years ago

   What would you do when you're in a situation where you meet a guy, then you both fall in love.
   
   You are both married you both love your spouse yet you also love each other, and you, the guy and the guy's wife are colleagues and you all three work hand in hand actually the guy is your senour and he has been quet about all this thing for years then 4 years later he comes and confronts you telling you how much he loves you and he has been trying to be professional but now he is failing the feelings has come out of his power and hands he can't keep this this to him self anymore. Would you tell him you love him too or you would ignore it and focus on you marriage yet you also die of his love

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2. 81

   dashingscorpioposted 7 years ago

   
   
   No. I don't believe one can be "in love" with two people.
   There are 3 reasons why most don't cheat.
   1. When someone is truly "in love" they simply won't (make the time) to get emotionally invested in someone else! They're too giddy with excitement about their future plans they have made with their mate.
   2. People say marriage requires hard work but the truth of the matter is finding the "right mate" is the really hard work!
   If you're "in love" and believe you have found "the one" the last thing you'd do is risk losing them!
   3. Lastly being "in love" means (you are vulnerable) and the very thought of how (you) would feel if your spouse cheated on you would destroy you.
   Having said that if someone is NOT "in love" with their spouse but simply just going with the flow, feeling bored, stuck in a rut, no passion or romance...
   This person might be open to flirting with someone or enjoying having someone flirt with them. Initially they tell themselves it's all (innocent fun) and gradually they start confiding in one another about things they don't share with their respective spouses or they bitch about their spouse's behavior and gain support from their "work spouse" until there is an emotional connection. 
   Secrecy and deception are the gateway to cheating.
   The first lie a "would be cheater" tells is to himself:
   The lie of justification!
   "We're just (friends)!", "Just because I'm married doesn't mean I can't friends of the opposite sex." I don't know all my wife/husband's friends...etc"
   The fact that they are both married only intensifies their desire for one another. {Obstacles are what romanticizes affairs!}
   "Life is so cruel! We both met our "soul-mates" at the wrong time!
   "We love each other but neither one of us wants to hurt our spouse...etc"
   "And yet I don't know much longer I could live without feeling your touch..."
   If the cheaters get caught they'll say:
   "We never meant for this to happen..."
   The bottom line is people cheat to compliment what they already have.
   Rarely do people cheat to replace one relationship with another!
   The goal of most cheaters is to hold onto all that is "good" in their primary relationship while addressing their other "needs" on the side.
   If they're "unhappy" in their marriage it's not at a point they want to run down to the courthouse to file for a divorce, move out of their home, lower their living standards, split up assets along with family and friends & become weekend parents.
   Cheaters don't think they'll get caught!

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   1. 60

      Mtshali Sisiposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      true cheaters don't think of the future or what might happen they only think of enjoying and satisfying their fillings. I like the your answer dishingscorpio

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   2. 81

      dashingscorpioposted 7 years agoin reply to this

      Very true!
      Cheaters are like immature teens in that they only think about what they want right (now)!
      Since (they don't expect to get caught) they don't consider any potential consequences!

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